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Overwhelming Negativity In This Section

negative positive progress bad feeling good stop please help advice

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#1 mrnegative

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Posted 13 June 2013 - 02:31 PM

First of all, I'd like to say that I've already noticed the irony of my username. I know this is easier said than done, but the overbearing negativity in this section of the forum is very destructive to some people's perception of themselves. When people go to this site, they do so for support and for good vibes. They are most likely down about their acne and are actively looking for solutions. In the meantime, when one clicks on this section, he or she shouldn't have to be bombarded with topic titles like "Dead," "Dying," "Life is over," "No pussy," "Acne is the worst thing that has ever happened and could happen to me in my life." These sorts of emotions are understandable in the midst of an acne breakout, but shouldn't be the be-all, end-all of any situation. I know that my words are unlikely to transform the nature of this section, but I've decided to put in my 2 cents worth pertaining to an issue I've been bothered by for a while now. What do you guys think? 



#2 fatalbert911

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Posted 13 June 2013 - 03:10 PM

Well bud i see where your coming from. Here is my opinion i myself have gone back and read some of the earliest post's on here like from 2003 & i was amazed at how similar some of their stories were to mine & others. i'v only read around four pages so perhaps it will get more positive later on but i doubt it. 

 

The way i see it there's only one good thing about acne, but the rest is just @#$%. i knew before coming into the emotional ans mental section, that it would be filled with negativity. But that was a given i mean can you really expect for this area to be mostly positive? everyday is practicality negative so why would people write otherwise? i for one am glad it is the way it is, because it's raw it's true & uncut. 

 

other people's experience with acne, have taught me what to expect in the real world & you know what? it's exactly how people on here say it is, i myself learned it the hard way from years of my own personal experience's. i want dan to keep the whole archive alive as long as acne is still around the amount of information on here about real world situations, what to expect & even how to cope with some are to me priceless.

 

I say if a person easily gets depressed from reading about the daily realities of what people like me and others have to go through then, perhaps they shouldn't be here & instead come back when they are ready.


Edited by fatalbert911, 15 June 2013 - 09:48 AM.


#3 Frank*L

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Posted 13 June 2013 - 07:40 PM

if the emotional and psychological effects of acne made us feel awesome then I'd agree with you. We come on here complain and let our feelings be known and others relate or try to help. Sometimes its cool to know that other people are out there going through the same sh*t. Also some of us have no one to turn to in real life to get our feelings out there. so whatever.



#4 aanabill

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Posted 14 June 2013 - 02:12 AM

u're right.there is at times a lot of negativity directly and indirectly.

but u see people here come to vent and this place is where they expect some understanding and support.

having said that i'd add that i feel people should be a lil' more stable and accept the fact that are explained.

some dnt really get the positives ever!

they keep suppressing it by minuses.

in fact at times i feel the urge to prove their minuses right prevent them from seeing the pluses.

 

one needs to understand that he/she is more than their skin and a good person/persona etc also plays a big role.

there are people with severe acne who r happy and are moving on and thus ready to achieve so much.

its sometimes pointless to sit and cry  and show the negatives all the time!



#5 AbstractFactory

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Posted 14 June 2013 - 01:11 PM

I don't see the problem. If acne's getting you down, then why not get it off your chest. At least here you'll get people who understand how shitty it can be.



#6 mrnegative

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Posted 14 June 2013 - 02:11 PM

The problem I have with the section is not the fact that it's not sparkling with positivity, laughter, and good vibes. It's the fact that many people basically seem severely depressed and do not respond positively to any sort of advice anyone gives them about how to go on and live life by not letting acne absorb all their energy. Yes, acne is quite a sensitive issue for a lot of people but this section gives the impression that those suffering from acne literally have nothing to live for. 



#7 snsdgirl14

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Posted 14 June 2013 - 02:37 PM

I know what you mean. Acne sucks - no doubt about it. But the overwhelming negativity in this forum does seem to create a sense of hopelessness in this place. I think it's because people that have acne BUT are optimistic about it aren't going to come to an acne forum, because they probably don't need to. Happy people don't get on the Internet and vent about their acne - mostly unhappy people do. So it's natural that this forum would be filled with negativity, but at the same time, it doesn't really help anyone. It's a vicious cycle.

 

Really, the best way to avoid the negativity is to simply stop coming to the forum, or at least to the Emotional section. I've found that there's been periods of time where I haven't visited the forums, and that's when I was thinking the least about my skin. 



#8 AghhNe

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Posted 14 June 2013 - 03:34 PM

I am depressed most of the times, but i come here to read positivity and to read some success stories. My favorite ones are the ones who endured so much more than a normal person with acne. If i read posts like that, I would feel i can do it too, that I can be happy.

Sad posts makes me sad and i don't like that feeling.

But oh well, not all people can be strong. Some needs to vent, or needs someone to talk to. 

IT WOULD BE GREAT if more post are positive.



#9 mrnegative

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Posted 14 June 2013 - 08:32 PM

I'll certainly take it upon myself to try to bring some positivity to this forum. Aw yeah, mrnegative bringing the positive. 



#10 freja

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Posted 14 June 2013 - 08:36 PM

Well, life is full of negative and positive emotions. And acne is mostly something that causes negative feelings, so it's no wonder really. This is really one of the only places a lot of people can go to vent about their frustrations when it comes to their skin.

 

I feel like if you're feeling negative and need to talk about it, that's a good thing. Bottling it up for the sake of being fake-happy doesn't do anyone any good.



#11 snsdgirl14

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Posted 15 June 2013 - 12:51 AM

There's a difference between getting down about it and thinking it's ruined your life, though. As distressing as acne is, it doesn't have to be debilitating, and you have to be able to cope and deal with life's troubles. It's not healthy throwing in the towel and thinking everything's over because of acne.



#12 Cyberpile

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Posted 15 June 2013 - 02:31 AM

First of all, I'd like to say that I've already noticed the irony of my username. When people go to this site, they do so for support and for good vibes. They are most likely down about their acne and are actively looking for solutions.

Your username is perfect. You're even being negative about negativity.

 

I was told so many positive things that might benefit most people, but harmed me. I was always told not to worry, it will go away soon and that my scars weren't permanent. My acne didn't go away and I wasn't aware that my face would end up being permanently covered with atrophic scars and enlarged pores for the rest of my life. Struggling to find a cure is the only reason my face isn't still covered with blackheads and whiteheads.

 

Some of the positive posts are harmful and depressing. I see posts saying that some movie star has severe acne scars and that the scars didn't hold him or her back, so acne scars basically don't matter. Then I look at the picture and the person has a few tiny irrelevant indents around the jawline and otherwise glowing, flawless and attractive skin with unnaturally small pores. I've heard an unbearable amound of bad positive arguments like this and I think these posts might bother people with severe scarring.


Edited by Sisyphus, 05 July 2013 - 07:33 PM.


#13 LewisS

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Posted 15 June 2013 - 05:01 AM

I guess that it's just the nature of this forum, after all it is the 'Emotional and Psychological Effects of Acne'. It's an area that we can just lay our emotions on the table rather than tormenting ourselves with them.

 

Maybe there should be a new forum called 'Emotional and Psychological Effects of being Clear'. Now that would be one happy forum! 



#14 aanabill

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Posted 15 June 2013 - 08:35 AM

First of all, I'd like to say that I've already noticed the irony of my username. When people go to this site, they do so for support and for good vibes. They are most likely down about their acne and are actively looking for solutions.

Your username is perfect. You're even being negative about negativity.

 

I was told so many positive things that might benefit most people, but harmed me. I was always told not to worry, it will go away soon and that my scars weren't permanent. My acne didn't go away and I wasn't aware that my face would end up being permanently covered with atrophic scars and enlarged pores for the rest of my life. Struggling to find a cure is the only reason my face isn't still covered with blackheads and whiteheads.

 

Some of the positive posts are harmful and depressing. I see posts saying that some movie star has severe acne scars and that the scars didn't hold him or her back, so acne scars basically don't matter. Then I look at the picture and the person has a few tiny irrelevant indents around the jawline and otherwise glowing, flawless and attractive skin with unnaturally small pores. I've heard an unbearable amound of bad positive arguments like this. I think these posts might bother people with severe scarring.

i would suggest u try to take things a lil; more positively my frnd.

will sad stuff make u happy?

and happy stuff make u sad.

since there's no third way,i'd say try a new angle.



#15 mrnegative

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Posted 15 June 2013 - 11:56 AM

Damn, well this topic blew up. Being positive has nothing to do with ignoring your acne. If you have acne, you should seek out treatment to minimize long-term damage to your skin. It's really as simple as that. The rest is psychological. If you wallow in negativity (something I'm prone to doing), you depress yourself and suck the energy out of your life. This is how acne can become debilitating. Also, Sisyphus, some movie stars DO have acne scars and many others are not very attractive in person sans make-up. Yes, there are actors and actresses with perfect skin, but there are also many that have skin issues just as serious (if not worse) than people on this site. snsdgirl14, I like our matching perspectives :) 



#16 snsdgirl14

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Posted 15 June 2013 - 07:40 PM

Damn, well this topic blew up. Being positive has nothing to do with ignoring your acne. If you have acne, you should seek out treatment to minimize long-term damage to your skin. It's really as simple as that. The rest is psychological. If you wallow in negativity (something I'm prone to doing), you depress yourself and suck the energy out of your life. This is how acne can become debilitating. Also, Sisyphus, some movie stars DO have acne scars and many others are not very attractive in person sans make-up. Yes, there are actors and actresses with perfect skin, but there are also many that have skin issues just as serious (if not worse) than people on this site. snsdgirl14, I like our matching perspectives smile.png

 

Exactly--the ideal thing to do is to try your best to help your skin and seek out new treatments if needed, but in the mean time, live your life. It's imperative to accept that your skin's not perfect, but then again, no person's is. Everywhere I look I see at least a few flaws on people's faces. And there are manyyyy celebrities I can think of that do not have perfect skin, by any means. Cameron Diaz, Anna Lynne Mccord, Harry Styles, Pixie Lott to name a few. Even celebrities known as being the "most beautiful" like Jessica Alba have skin problems...just google "Jessica Alba acne".

 

I am by no means Miss Positive or anything like that. Most days, it's hard for me to even get up in the morning because I don't want to deal with my skin. I've dealt with far too much anxiety and depression over acne though, to the point where I'm actively trying to be more positive about it, if only for my mental wellbeing. I have way too much that I want to accomplish in life, and I can't let acne hold me back, so I've chosen not to. That doesn't mean I don't get bummed over my skin, but it also doesn't mean I give up on everything. It's just learning to have a healthy balance. 



#17 mrnegative

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Posted 16 June 2013 - 07:08 AM

Damn, well this topic blew up. Being positive has nothing to do with ignoring your acne. If you have acne, you should seek out treatment to minimize long-term damage to your skin. It's really as simple as that. The rest is psychological. If you wallow in negativity (something I'm prone to doing), you depress yourself and suck the energy out of your life. This is how acne can become debilitating. Also, Sisyphus, some movie stars DO have acne scars and many others are not very attractive in person sans make-up. Yes, there are actors and actresses with perfect skin, but there are also many that have skin issues just as serious (if not worse) than people on this site. snsdgirl14, I like our matching perspectives smile.png

 

Exactly--the ideal thing to do is to try your best to help your skin and seek out new treatments if needed, but in the mean time, live your life. It's imperative to accept that your skin's not perfect, but then again, no person's is. Everywhere I look I see at least a few flaws on people's faces. And there are manyyyy celebrities I can think of that do not have perfect skin, by any means. Cameron Diaz, Anna Lynne Mccord, Harry Styles, Pixie Lott to name a few. Even celebrities known as being the "most beautiful" like Jessica Alba have skin problems...just google "Jessica Alba acne".

 

I am by no means Miss Positive or anything like that. Most days, it's hard for me to even get up in the morning because I don't want to deal with my skin. I've dealt with far too much anxiety and depression over acne though, to the point where I'm actively trying to be more positive about it, if only for my mental wellbeing. I have way too much that I want to accomplish in life, and I can't let acne hold me back, so I've chosen not to. That doesn't mean I don't get bummed over my skin, but it also doesn't mean I give up on everything. It's just learning to have a healthy balance. 

 

Great post once more. I really wish to encourage everyone to take on this sort of view of acne. If you're prone to it, accept that you'll have to deal with it in one way or another. The first step is getting a professional opinion so you know you're not wasting your time on dead-end treatments. After that, it's all about following a regimen religiously to keep your skin at bay. Your mental happiness will likely result from the power you'll feel you have over your skin while performing your strict routine. There will likely be bad days - there always are. The important thing is, those bad days won't last when you find the treatment that works for you. There is no cure for acne, there are only temporary solutions aimed at keeping it suppressed while the body naturally moves past that stage. Yes, even Accutane isn't a permanent solution. 



#18 UnacceptedRealist

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Posted 16 June 2013 - 05:02 PM

I'm not sure I understand the premise of your thread.  Is it not natural, and appropriate, for a sub-forum titled "emotional and psychological effects of acne" to contain negatively titled topics?  What did you expect? 

 

Also, although many of the topics in this section are negatively titled, I've found that many of the responses are the complete opposite---they promote a much more positive outlook.

 

Basically, I think it's a bit silly to come to this sub-forum and expect "positively" titled topics.

 

Furthermore, with regards to this post:

 

The problem I have with the section is not the fact that it's not sparkling with positivity, laughter, and good vibes. It's the fact that many people basically seem severely depressed and do not respond positively to any sort of advice anyone gives them about how to go on and live life by not letting acne absorb all their energy. Yes, acne is quite a sensitive issue for a lot of people but this section gives the impression that those suffering from acne literally have nothing to live for.

 

I, again, don't agree.  In fact, people telling me how to feel about my acne is one of my biggest pet peeves.  What if I am depressed?  Is this not allowed to be part of my "emotional and psychological effects of acne"?  Should you come to such a forum looking for something to live for?

 

 



#19 Cyberpile

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Posted 16 June 2013 - 09:43 PM

i would suggest u try to take things a lil; more positively my frnd.

will sad stuff make u happy?

and happy stuff make u sad.

since there's no third way,i'd say try a new angle.

 Do you enjoy sad movies and books? Yes, sad stuff does make people feel better. Research shows listening to sad songs helps people recover from breakups. So, maybe sad posts help people recover from breakouts.rolleyes.gif Furthermore, listening to sad songs can make you feel like someone out there knows how you feel and that can help you feel less alone when you’re depressed. I think people like knowing someone out there sort of knows what it’s like to have their severe acne, instead of someone with decent skin telling them what they foolishly believe they should do. There are also plenty of reasons why expressing yourself is beneficial, even if some people can’t really relate and perceive the posts as off-putting and negative.

In my previous post I was just giving reasons why positivity isn’t necessarily helpful for those with severe acne and scarring.  I have nothing against positivity. I’m just against all the spurious arguments and bogus beliefs that people have about severe acne. The misconceptions are harmful.  People need to know how much of an impact acne can have on an attractive person’s life, so parents will bother to take their kids to a dermatologist. Studies show acne significantly affects a person’s quality of life especially for those who have had acne for years. Studies also show skin blemishes strangely make a person’s face appear less symmetrical and therefore less attractive.  A study also shows healthy even toned skin trumps masculinity for male attractiveness. Also, acne and severe scarring can significantly decrease a person’s mate value. There are so many reasons people automatically wrongly dismiss all acne scarring as being nothing serious, which is why I hope these posts, which some people consider negative, might help increase social awareness. However, positive posts might help increase traffic to this section of the forum since severe acne and scarring isn't nearly as common as mild acne, and most mild acne sufferers might come here for a good vibe.

"There is no single disease which causes more psychic trauma, more maladjustment between parents and children, more general insecurity and feelings of inferiority and greater sums of psychic suffering than does acne vulgaris."  --Sulzberger & Zaldems"



#20 Sum1killme

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Posted 16 June 2013 - 10:51 PM

I agree with sisyphus if your acne is mild and acne still fucks with you just imagine having severe fucking acne all over your motherfucking face for goddamn years, fucking years of a fucking human beings life whith disfiguring shit on your face and trying to be positive and skip around like everything is nice and dandy. Trust me that shit is hard to do when people will talk shit, give nasty looks, reject you,laugh,ect. And then you think well fuck what people think, but when you look in the mirror and you realize how hideous and alone you really are, when death seems refreshing that's when you find out how bad acne can fucking destroy a mind body and a hypothetical soul.