Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Feeling So Ugly/ Nose Job

29 posts in this topic

Your nose is kind of large but it suits you. I don't know what you mean about the asymmetry. In any case, you're a very beautiful girl.

Your post reminds me of something someone who's had a lot of relationship experience once said namely that the greater a woman's beauty the more insecure she is about her looks. Don't know if that's true but you're definately very beautiful and you're definately very insecure.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Why isn't she a 10/10 in your eyes then? lol.gif

I'm basically just messing with you. Your post was/is well meant.

lol girl coming from a decent looking male here you look perfectly fine, hot even. 9/10. The accutane is messing with your emotions. Don't take it again. Try and stay clear through diet changes instead.

Thank you. And yes, it is kind of big, lol. And I am insecure. I definitely need to work on that.

>I think you are suffering from BDD. I looked at your post Accutane pictures and not only does your skin look PERFECT (not even kidding, I'm jealous) but you are a VERY pretty girl. Your nose is not 'bulbous', it is perfectly fine. You have very big, beautiful blue eyes and very pretty hair and skin. Honestly, I can think of a TON of guys who would think you were cute, hot, beautiful, etc. I'm telling you, this is all in your head. You should definitely seek therapy and maybe consider anti-depressants or anti-anxiety meds before you get any plastic surgery done. People with BDD often turn to plastic surgery as a solution, but not only does this fuel their obsession, they are often even more depressed after the surgery. PLEASE think about this and get help before you get a nose job.

You are beautiful and I hope you realize that one day.

Thank you, thank you! You're a sweetheart! wub.png I realize you're probably right. I used to obsess over my acne, and I thought that once I got rid of it I would feel good about myself. Boy, I was wrong. I just found other things to fixate on. Again, thank you!

Hey sorry you're feeling so crappy. I too know how it feels to look in the mirror and hate every little thing, pick out each perceived flaw. But seriously, it is all in your (and our) heads. We pick ourselves apart and it just adds to the frustration. You're a beautiful girl. It really is a waste of time, energy, and overall life to fixate on tiny things that in the grande scheme of things, do not matter. Don't waste the time or money on a nose job. You'll feel the exact same afterwards. Its not an issue of appearance, its an issue of attitude and depression it seems like to me. You'll be so much happier if you can learn to accept yourself for exactly how you are, right now. I know that is easier said than done. I know exactly how you're feeling, you're not alone. I'm two years clean from self harm and I thank my therapist for that, but also myself. I put in a lot of work into accepting myself and now I really focus on improving my inner self and qualities, and my appearance follows suit. I don't look perfect and there are still things I don't like about my appearance but they don't carry as much weight anymore. My advice would be to see your therapist. I know talking can be super hard so I often write down what I'm feeling instead. Then she can read it and its easier to open the door for discussion. Also surround yourself only with people who lift you up. Friends who concentrate on who you are as a person, not what you look like. People who place less importance on their appearance as well. I hope you feel better soon!

Thank you so much! This is such great advice. It's nice to know I'm not alone, and that you know what I'm feeling right now. You're right that it probably really isn't about appearance. I really hope to make peace with myself. I'm so glad to hear you've successfully overcome cutting, and two years clean, that's incredible! I've only been clean for six months, and it hasn't entirely been by choice, but I'm glad I've stopped. I still have a lot of urges, which kind of scares me. I don't want to go back to that dark place. That's such a great idea to write down your feelings. Probably the greatest hurdle I've faced in therapy is opening up and feeling comfortable enough to talk about my feelings. Thank you for talking to me! <3

Hey 6 months is amazing! At first I didn't stop for myself either. I stopped because my roommates and friends were starting to suffer because of it and the therapist was all like "blah, blah, blah you've got to make a change". And at first it was hard, and I had no coping strategies, and everything still sucked. But eventually, and slowly... other things started to overshadow the dark thoughts and the sun shone through and things started to look up. Classes were important again and I started finding it easier to vent to friends instead of hiding in my room. Finding friends who can act as a strong support system is super important. Things I found super helpful and some sound stupid were spending time in the sunshine (I know, it sounds weird, especially when people like us are usually stuck in long sleeves and pants) but the literal sunshine really helped me. I started spending time at my local SPCA walking dogs and it gave me such a good feeling to spend some time with some animals. They needed the love I had to give and I needed the love they had to give! Plus the light exercise really helped as well. And of course, my therapist, it really does help to talk things out because sometimes people like us can be a little delusional and have a hard time seeing things in other ways besides black and white. I found an antidepressant that worked for me and after a year, I didn't need it anymore. I won't lie though, I still think about it sometimes. The thought will invade when something hard happens and it is sometimes the first thing I think of to do. But now I've got a support system that can help me talk things out and find some other ways to get out the bad energy besides taking it out on myself. We are better than that and we deserve to be happy. Sorry for the long reply, I just wanted to let you know that even if it seems SO hard right now, it doesn't mean tomorrow isn't the day where things will turn the corner. I really hope things get amazing again really soon for you :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You are so right - Conformity isnt so great!!!!!

You have a look that sets you apart from everyone else. Dont question your unique beauty, find a way to get to a place within yourself where you can embrace it!!

It will take time but you WILL get there. Today, your first step was to write this post and get feedback from this community that GETS YOU... that was a huge step FORWARD. Keep moving in that direction and when the negative thoughts get the best of you, go to a playground and swing on some swings or put a mind-numbing show on TV (like some sort of reality show hehe) and keep yourself moving in the direction you, deep down inside, YOU KNOW YOU HAVE TO GO... Things will get better! It will - You have a lot to be thankful for and im sure when you have those few moments of clarity, you see that! Lets get you to a place where you can feel those few moments every single day!

smile.png


Am:

Cetaphil

ceraVe lotion

PM:

Cetaphil

ceraVe Lotion

Differin

wash my face with cetaphil before and after working out

sometimes add Glytone - mild gel wash to the regimen and then Glytone alphy hydroxy lotion at night

Finished my Accutane Course in August 2010!!


Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ugh, I've felt so down on myself lately. I feel so ugly all the time, and it's not just my skin that's bothering me. I hate pretty much everything about the way I look. My nose is HUGE and bulbous and it's crooked, and I really want to get a nose job, but it's so expensive, and I'm worried about what effect it would have on my skin. Even my mom and one of my friends thinks I need a nose job, and my sister's boyfriend likes to make subtle comments about how huge and ugly my nose is. Plus, my face is really asymmetrical, to the point that it's really obvious. I had juvenile arthritis that caused jaw problems, and it's caused my face to develop kind of weird, so my face is kind of crooked. One side of my face is bigger than the other, and my right eye is smaller than my left and is kind of lazy. My eyebrows are too thin and low-set. My eyes are too small, and I look disgusting without makeup. My lips are too small. My thighs are ginormous, and I'm super flabby. I went from 130 lbs at 5'7 to 105, and now I have no muscle. I have stretch marks. My breasts are too small, and they too are very different sizes (sorry). I'm even insecure about my freaking labia!! (Sorry again). I just don't know what to do. I went through a really tough time in November, and I'm afraid all of the progress I've made is going down the drain. I made a suicide attempt in November and was sent to a psychiatric hospital to be treated for depression and self-harm. My therapist there said she had never seen a patient which such severe/so many cuts. I have to wear long sleeves all of the time because my scars are so bad. I just really hate myself. Sorry to rant, and for sharing such personal information, but I really, really need support right now.

You are beautiful. PLEASE don't mess up your lovely nose! I used to want a nose job too but I eventually learned to like my nose and now I'm so thankful that I never let some money-hungry "doctor" hack away at my individuality! There is nothing wrong with your nose. It isn't unnaturally big or weird and these people who make fun of you for it are insecure and ABUSIVE little fuckheads. You would be better off staying away from people like that.

I've also struggled with cutting so I totally understand. And I have the whole crooked jaw thing which drives me crazy also. sad.png But it's definitely not very noticeable to other people. Mine is really obvious to the point that I look different depending on which side you are looking at me, but it doesn't really matter. A lot of people are nice looking, but you have a look that many women would envy.

You are so sweet, thank you! Gosh, I'm shocked that you ever disliked your nose, you're so beautiful! And I've definitely never noticed the jaw thing.

It really sucks that I hated myself so much that I cut myself. I'm so sorry you struggled with this too. It's really rough, and it took me a long time to stop. I hope this time it is for good. I cut on and off for five years. Thank you for your kind words, I really appreciate it! <3

>

Ugh, I've felt so down on myself lately. I feel so ugly all the time, and it's not just my skin that's bothering me. I hate pretty much everything about the way I look. My nose is HUGE and bulbous and it's crooked, and I really want to get a nose job, but it's so expensive, and I'm worried about what effect it would have on my skin. Even my mom and one of my friends thinks I need a nose job, and my sister's boyfriend likes to make subtle comments about how huge and ugly my nose is. Plus, my face is really asymmetrical, to the point that it's really obvious. I had juvenile arthritis that caused jaw problems, and it's caused my face to develop kind of weird, so my face is kind of crooked. One side of my face is bigger than the other, and my right eye is smaller than my left and is kind of lazy. My eyebrows are too thin and low-set. My eyes are too small, and I look disgusting without makeup. My lips are too small. My thighs are ginormous, and I'm super flabby. I went from 130 lbs at 5'7 to 105, and now I have no muscle. I have stretch marks. My breasts are too small, and they too are very different sizes (sorry). I'm even insecure about my freaking labia!! (Sorry again). I just don't know what to do. I went through a really tough time in November, and I'm afraid all of the progress I've made is going down the drain. I made a suicide attempt in November and was sent to a psychiatric hospital to be treated for depression and self-harm. My therapist there said she had never seen a patient which such severe/so many cuts. I have to wear long sleeves all of the time because my scars are so bad. I just really hate myself. Sorry to rant, and for sharing such personal information, but I really, really need support right now.

I just want to say that look like Scarlet Johansson. Has anyone told you that? You are really pretty! Believe me, I am telling you the truth! There is nothing wrong wit your nose/face. Your nose is actually unique in a beautiful way. We are here for you! XOXO!

Gosh, what a sweet compliment! Thank you! I've never hear that, but I'm told A LOT that I look like Lady Gaga. I'm not sure how I feel about that. I've also been told I look like Phoebe from "Friends," Stevie Nicks when she was young, and, ugh, Chelsea Clinton o.O. I don't think I look like any of them. I would love to look like Scarlett Johansson though. She is sooo beautiful.

Yep, lady! YOU DO look like Scarlett! She is beautiful, just like you :) XOXO!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Your nose is kind of large but it suits you. I don't know what you mean about the asymmetry. In any case, you're a very beautiful girl.

Your post reminds me of something someone who's had a lot of relationship experience once said namely that the greater a woman's beauty the more insecure she is about her looks. Don't know if that's true but you're definately very beautiful and you're definately very insecure.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Why isn't she a 10/10 in your eyes then? lol.gif

I'm basically just messing with you. Your post was/is well meant.

lol girl coming from a decent looking male here you look perfectly fine, hot even. 9/10. The accutane is messing with your emotions. Don't take it again. Try and stay clear through diet changes instead.

Thank you. And yes, it is kind of big, lol. And I am insecure. I definitely need to work on that.

>>I think you are suffering from BDD. I looked at your post Accutane pictures and not only does your skin look PERFECT (not even kidding, I'm jealous) but you are a VERY pretty girl. Your nose is not 'bulbous', it is perfectly fine. You have very big, beautiful blue eyes and very pretty hair and skin. Honestly, I can think of a TON of guys who would think you were cute, hot, beautiful, etc. I'm telling you, this is all in your head. You should definitely seek therapy and maybe consider anti-depressants or anti-anxiety meds before you get any plastic surgery done. People with BDD often turn to plastic surgery as a solution, but not only does this fuel their obsession, they are often even more depressed after the surgery. PLEASE think about this and get help before you get a nose job.

You are beautiful and I hope you realize that one day.

lockquote>

Thank you, thank you! You're a sweetheart! wub.png I realize you're probably right. I used to obsess over my acne, and I thought that once I got rid of it I would feel good about myself. Boy, I was wrong. I just found other things to fixate on. Again, thank you!

>Hey sorry you're feeling so crappy. I too know how it feels to look in the mirror and hate every little thing, pick out each perceived flaw. But seriously, it is all in your (and our) heads. We pick ourselves apart and it just adds to the frustration. You're a beautiful girl. It really is a waste of time, energy, and overall life to fixate on tiny things that in the grande scheme of things, do not matter. Don't waste the time or money on a nose job. You'll feel the exact same afterwards. Its not an issue of appearance, its an issue of attitude and depression it seems like to me. You'll be so much happier if you can learn to accept yourself for exactly how you are, right now. I know that is easier said than done. I know exactly how you're feeling, you're not alone. I'm two years clean from self harm and I thank my therapist for that, but also myself. I put in a lot of work into accepting myself and now I really focus on improving my inner self and qualities, and my appearance follows suit. I don't look perfect and there are still things I don't like about my appearance but they don't carry as much weight anymore. My advice would be to see your therapist. I know talking can be super hard so I often write down what I'm feeling instead. Then she can read it and its easier to open the door for discussion. Also surround yourself only with people who lift you up. Friends who concentrate on who you are as a person, not what you look like. People who place less importance on their appearance as well. I hope you feel better soon!

Thank you so much! This is such great advice. It's nice to know I'm not alone, and that you know what I'm feeling right now. You're right that it probably really isn't about appearance. I really hope to make peace with myself. I'm so glad to hear you've successfully overcome cutting, and two years clean, that's incredible! I've only been clean for six months, and it hasn't entirely been by choice, but I'm glad I've stopped. I still have a lot of urges, which kind of scares me. I don't want to go back to that dark place. That's such a great idea to write down your feelings. Probably the greatest hurdle I've faced in therapy is opening up and feeling comfortable enough to talk about my feelings. Thank you for talking to me! <3

Hey 6 months is amazing! At first I didn't stop for myself either. I stopped because my roommates and friends were starting to suffer because of it and the therapist was all like "blah, blah, blah you've got to make a change". And at first it was hard, and I had no coping strategies, and everything still sucked. But eventually, and slowly... other things started to overshadow the dark thoughts and the sun shone through and things started to look up. Classes were important again and I started finding it easier to vent to friends instead of hiding in my room. Finding friends who can act as a strong support system is super important. Things I found super helpful and some sound stupid were spending time in the sunshine (I know, it sounds weird, especially when people like us are usually stuck in long sleeves and pants) but the literal sunshine really helped me. I started spending time at my local SPCA walking dogs and it gave me such a good feeling to spend some time with some animals. They needed the love I had to give and I needed the love they had to give! Plus the light exercise really helped as well. And of course, my therapist, it really does help to talk things out because sometimes people like us can be a little delusional and have a hard time seeing things in other ways besides black and white. I found an antidepressant that worked for me and after a year, I didn't need it anymore. I won't lie though, I still think about it sometimes. The thought will invade when something hard happens and it is sometimes the first thing I think of to do. But now I've got a support system that can help me talk things out and find some other ways to get out the bad energy besides taking it out on myself. We are better than that and we deserve to be happy. Sorry for the long reply, I just wanted to let you know that even if it seems SO hard right now, it doesn't mean tomorrow isn't the day where things will turn the corner. I really hope things get amazing again really soon for you smile.png

Yeah, stopping was hard. Like you, when something hard happens it is the first thing I think to do. Even though I still have urges, overall I am so glad I stopped. It really hurt my parents, and I think my sister took it especially hard because she cut for a while herself. I totally understand what you mean about getting sunshine! It's kind of funny actually, because I hate going out when I depressed especially when it' sunny, but it always makes me feel sooo much better. Maybe it has to do with getting vitamin D? Whatever the reason, it works. I would love to volunteer at an animal shelter! I'm so lucky because I have two of the cutest, sweetest dogs at home and nine (yes nine!) cats, and I love them all probably more than anything in the world! We also started taking care of a colony of Ferrell cats around the same time I got really depressed, so I was surrounded by lots of animal love!! :) The cats basically live on our porch now, and four or five of them will come into the house on a regular basis. One of them, a chubby orange little boy, comes inside in the mornings and cuddles up with me in bed. I know, I'm a crazy cat lady, but I can't help it! Four of the nine cats that are actually ours were the kittens of two of the Ferrell cats, and they are the cutest dang things in the world! Anyway, it sounds like you put a lot of work into getting better, and I'm so happy for you. You've been so helpful, and I hope you know how much I appreciate it!! I don't mind your long response at all. It's nice that you gave me such a thoughtful reply. Thanks you so, so much. :)<3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites