15 Year Old Female- Roaccutane Uk- Let's Do This! (Pictures Included)

120 posts in this topic

Day 24

Thanks for the advice smile.png

I brought some eye drops from Boots today that are designed for dry eyes so I'll see how I get on.

I have the strangest rash on my foot. It's only on my last 3 toes and it's made the skin is lumpy. It's not at all red but it is really itchy. I have never had anything like it, the side of my toe is an odd shape because of a large squishy lump on the side of it. It's so weird.

I tried putting insect bite cream and Sudocrem on it to help the itching but they had not effect.

I was planning to make a appointment to see my GP about it, but I'll see my derm at the hospital on the 17th May and I don't suppose I'll be able to get a Dr's appointment before then anyway. I will show my derm when I see her next Monday.

Hey Accutane Buddy!

How have you been? wink.png

Have you tried taking fish oil with the pills yet? I stopped taking my pill with olive oil, only with fish oil pill now~ ( The olive oil was too much work! I need to pour it on the spoon and all that... I am too lazyyyy, haha!!! Would be better if it were in pill form though... )

I haven't experienced any dry eyes so far on my course .( In fact the only things that I am experiencing are some random break outs, and dry lips, )

Maybe the fish oil plays a role in this! It's even supposed to help with joint pain on Accutane which I haven't experienced.

Hope all is well! smile.png

Edited by Helton

Helton's Accutane Log:

: )


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Dry soe hydrocortisone ointment or cream


Regimen:

AM: CeraVe foaming face wash, 100mg Spirolactone

PM: CeraVe foaming face wash, witch hazel, Acne.org AHA+

Been taking Sprio since 1/2013


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Day 24

Thanks for the advice smile.png

I brought some eye drops from Boots today that are designed for dry eyes so I'll see how I get on.

I have the strangest rash on my foot. It's only on my last 3 toes and it's made the skin is lumpy. It's not at all red but it is really itchy. I have never had anything like it, the side of my toe is an odd shape because of a large squishy lump on the side of it. It's so weird.

I tried putting insect bite cream and Sudocrem on it to help the itching but they had not effect.

I was planning to make a appointment to see my GP about it, but I'll see my derm at the hospital on the 17th May and I don't suppose I'll be able to get a Dr's appointment before then anyway. I will show my derm when I see her next Monday.

Hey Accutane Buddy!

How have you been? wink.png

Have you tried taking fish oil with the pills yet? I stopped taking my pill with olive oil, only with fish oil pill now~ ( The olive oil was too much work! I need to pour it on the spoon and all that... I am too lazyyyy, haha!!! Would be better if it were in pill form though... )

I haven't experienced any dry eyes so far on my course .( In fact the only things that I am experiencing are some random break outs, and dry lips, )

Maybe the fish oil plays a role in this! It's even supposed to help with joint pain on Accutane which I haven't experienced.

Hope all is well! smile.png

I'm surprisingly good thank you Helton!

No, I'm not taking my pills with oil. I tried to take a pill with a spoonful of olive oil a few days ago, but turns out that extra virgin olive oil tastes AWFUL on its own so I gave up on that idea. I looked into buying olive oil pills but they're quite hard to get hold of. They're also not cheap (or the ones I could find were not cheap anyway) and at the moment I'm spending (well my mum's spending...) so much on vaseline, moisturiser and now eye drops that I didn't really want to ask her to buy me more Accutane paraphernalia. It's going to be an expensive few months... ;)

If in a couple of months I don't think my body is absorbing this drug then I'll definitely invest in some fish oil pills.

How's Accutane treating you so far? Judging by your log you're pretty good, right?

Dry soe hydrocortisone ointment or cream

Thanks for the recommendation :)

Are you sure I am okay to use this since my skin is so sensitive at the moment? I think I'll see what my derm says, but I'll mention this to her :)


16th May-27th October 2013

15 Years Old/Female/52kg

Month 1- 20mg

Month 2- 40mg

Month 3- 40mg

Month 4- 50mg

Month 5 and 1/2- 50mg

Also see page 4 on my log for the before and after photos :)

"You can't make a rainbow without a little rain"


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Day 26

My hand is now covered in tiny bumps, almost like a rash, but it's not itchy, red or sore, just really strange and it only covers one hand.

If it gets any worse I will try and get an appointment with my GP because I still have that itchy, lumpy rash on my foot.

My acne has definitely got worse sad.png I'm getting spots on areas of my face that I never used to get them. My skin is dry if I don't slap on a load of moisturiser and my lips feel like they will fall off if I forget to take lip balm with me when I go out. My eyes need eye drops every few hours and the inside of my nose is dry and crusty.

I have to keep telling myself that it will be worth all this in the end.

On the plus side, my hair is great! Before if I washed my hair on Monday, it would need washing again on Tuesday as it used to get oily so quickly. Well, not any more! I washed my hair 4 days ago, and it still feels fresh and shows no signs of grease.

I'm wondering if it's normal to get these side effects so early in my treatment? Especially since I'm on such a low dosage at the moment. It could be because I'm so young?

Edited by EatsRainbows

16th May-27th October 2013

15 Years Old/Female/52kg

Month 1- 20mg

Month 2- 40mg

Month 3- 40mg

Month 4- 50mg

Month 5 and 1/2- 50mg

Also see page 4 on my log for the before and after photos :)

"You can't make a rainbow without a little rain"


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Day 24

Thanks for the advice smile.png

I brought some eye drops from Boots today that are designed for dry eyes so I'll see how I get on.

I have the strangest rash on my foot. It's only on my last 3 toes and it's made the skin is lumpy. It's not at all red but it is really itchy. I have never had anything like it, the side of my toe is an odd shape because of a large squishy lump on the side of it. It's so weird.

I tried putting insect bite cream and Sudocrem on it to help the itching but they had not effect.

I was planning to make a appointment to see my GP about it, but I'll see my derm at the hospital on the 17th May and I don't suppose I'll be able to get a Dr's appointment before then anyway. I will show my derm when I see her next Monday.

Hey Accutane Buddy!

How have you been? wink.png

Have you tried taking fish oil with the pills yet? I stopped taking my pill with olive oil, only with fish oil pill now~ ( The olive oil was too much work! I need to pour it on the spoon and all that... I am too lazyyyy, haha!!! Would be better if it were in pill form though... )

I haven't experienced any dry eyes so far on my course .( In fact the only things that I am experiencing are some random break outs, and dry lips, )

Maybe the fish oil plays a role in this! It's even supposed to help with joint pain on Accutane which I haven't experienced.

Hope all is well! smile.png

I'm surprisingly good thank you Helton!

No, I'm not taking my pills with oil. I tried to take a pill with a spoonful of olive oil a few days ago, but turns out that extra virgin olive oil tastes AWFUL on its own so I gave up on that idea. I looked into buying olive oil pills but they're quite hard to get hold of. They're also not cheap (or the ones I could find were not cheap anyway) and at the moment I'm spending (well my mum's spending...) so much on vaseline, moisturiser and now eye drops that I didn't really want to ask her to buy me more Accutane paraphernalia. It's going to be an expensive few months... wink.png

If in a couple of months I don't think my body is absorbing this drug then I'll definitely invest in some fish oil pills.

How's Accutane treating you so far? Judging by your log you're pretty good, right?

That's great to hear! smile.png

My Accutane's treating me well so far; I agree with you completely on the hair part~ My hair feels so niceeee, I used to have to wash it everyday or it gets greasy X_X

My skin is going through the stage where the break outs died down and they are slowly peeling off which is a good sign to know they are renewing, scrubbing is no good during this stage so I am just going to look crazy biggrin.png

You don't really have to do the fish oil/olive oil thing as long as u r eating a meal with fat in it. I just get lazy some time and eat like a piece of toast for breakfast then rush out to school, that's when the fish oil pill comes in handy wink.png

But I like fish oil because of the omega 3 + the fat content, I also eat alot chia seed for the omega 3 too, they are good stuff smile.png

And I agree olive oil tastes awful on its own, it burns my throat too X_X

Maybe u can have a spoon of avocado when taking ur pill, it's full of good fat too :)

I hope the rash/bumps on ur hand and foot will heal soon!

And it will FOR SURE worth it at the end! smile.png

Edited by Helton

Helton's Accutane Log:

: )


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Hi! Do you remember me! You gave me advice on my post!

For the nose - I've heard a lot of people put vaseline/aquaphor up there on cutips.

^^^

I feel in any other context that would sound really creepy.

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Hi! Do you remember me! You gave me advice on my post!

For the nose - I've heard a lot of people put vaseline/aquaphor up there on cutips.

^^^I feel in any other context that would sound really creepy.

Hi! Yes I totally remember you! NIce you see you here smile.png

Thanks, great advice, been using that little trick every night before bed and it seems to be helping.

Day 33

So... my rash is driving me crazy. It's unbelievably itchy and is now on both feet and both hands. I've been putting a ice pack on it before bed and this helps numb it and stop the itching so I can sleep. I will see my derm tomorrow and this will be the first thing I ask about.

This is my little army of supplies... (sorry the picture is terrible quality). Will be interesting when I have to take this lot on holiday...

post-197330-0-57332900-1371390703_thumb.

My recommendations so far have to be:

  • Wash with Aqueous cream
  • Use baby oil as a body moisturiser
  • Buy Palmer's cocoa butter as a moisturiser to use on face
  • Use an intense moisturiser on your hair (mine's been incredibly dry). I use John Frieda's intensive repair
  • I use Sterimar's nose spray as it helps to moisten and clean the inside of your nose

And as for the lips... you can see my vast collection of products I've tried (e.g. Nivea, Vaseline) I can say that Burt's Bees is the best lip balm out there. I also use Blistex intensive lip repair treatment twice a day which is quite good.

Just ask if you can't read the label on a bottle in the picture and I'll upload a better one of the product you want smile.png

As for my mood, I felt really down on day 29/30 and I just didn't feel myself. On day 29 everything just got to me and I cried (which is very unusual for me). My mum and dad were so worried about me and asked me every 5 minutes if I was 'okay', However I'm so happy to report that after those 2 rough days I feel completely fine now.

So far... it's been okay. Derm appointment tomorrow so I'll see how it goes.

Edited by EatsRainbows

16th May-27th October 2013

15 Years Old/Female/52kg

Month 1- 20mg

Month 2- 40mg

Month 3- 40mg

Month 4- 50mg

Month 5 and 1/2- 50mg

Also see page 4 on my log for the before and after photos :)

"You can't make a rainbow without a little rain"


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I was really overly emotional when I was on accutane. It was weird. I wasn't depressed or anything but I would cry over anything. I would get into a tiff with my sister and I would be crying and I would read something touching and cry like a baby it was weird, things I wouldn't normally let get to me affected me more more. Lots of people I talks to during my course had issues similar to this or being bitchy and not being able to stop even though you knew you were over reacting. Accutane is crazy medication.

Have you tried bag balm on your lips yet? It's cheap and works wonderfully. If there is one thing I could recommend during a course would be bag balm.


Regimen:

AM: CeraVe foaming face wash, 100mg Spirolactone

PM: CeraVe foaming face wash, witch hazel, Acne.org AHA+

Been taking Sprio since 1/2013


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I was really overly emotional when I was on accutane. It was weird. I wasn't depressed or anything but I would cry over anything. I would get into a tiff with my sister and I would be crying and I would read something touching and cry like a baby it was weird, things I wouldn't normally let get to me affected me more more. Lots of people I talks to during my course had issues similar to this or being bitchy and not being able to stop even though you knew you were over reacting. Accutane is crazy medication.

Have you tried bag balm on your lips yet? It's cheap and works wonderfully. If there is one thing I could recommend during a course would be bag balm.

I'm experiencing the exact same thing, and I'm not really an emotional person. The day after my super bad day I had an argument with my sister and she when she came to make up with me I cried as she hugged me. It was crazy. I'm not worried though, as you said, I don't feel depressed just tearful and silly things.

No, I'm not sure where to buy bag balm in the UK so I think I'd have to get it online. For the moment, Burt's Bees is doing the job fairly well but if I get fed up of it then I'll look into bag balm more so thank you for your recommendation.

Day 34

Had a hospital appointment this morning. I went expecting to see my derm but I saw a specialist nurse instead, who I have to say, was much more knowledgeable than the doctor I had seen previously and she was very helpful.

Turns out the rash on my hands and feet is a strange type of eczema, caused by my skin being so dry. The nurse gave me three different samples of intensive moisturisers to try and she wrote down the name of a steroid cream that would help. She said that if in a few days my rash has not improved then I should get an appointment with my GP so he can prescribe me the steroid cream. I'll let you know how I get on with the moisturisers.

My dosage has been increased from 20mg to 40mg. I had to do another pregnancy test today (even though I opted out of the pregnancy prevention plan) and you'll all be pleased to know that they gave me a marginally larger pot to aim for! ;) Then the nurse confirmed that I am in fact not pregnant (surprise surprise...) and the other good news is that I don't have to have a blood test next month (Whoooop!).

Just a word on blood tests, if you're a wuss like me and you're worried about taking this drug because of the blood tests, don't be. They get less nerve racking every time and they're always not as bad as you think they'll be.

I strongly recommend Palmer's Cocoa Butter (I buy the original solid formula) as it is such a nice moisturiser for my face and it makes your skin feel so smooth even once you wake up in the morning and the cream's all rubbed off.

Finally, all the tiny spots that I used to get all over my forehead are gone and my skin doesn't feel as horribly rough as it did a couple of weeks ago. It's hard to tell if the rest of my skin's improved, but I think it has. I can't explain how nice it is to not have to worry about oily, shiny skin like I used to have to do aaaall daaaay long.


16th May-27th October 2013

15 Years Old/Female/52kg

Month 1- 20mg

Month 2- 40mg

Month 3- 40mg

Month 4- 50mg

Month 5 and 1/2- 50mg

Also see page 4 on my log for the before and after photos :)

"You can't make a rainbow without a little rain"


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Day 39

I'm finding all this a bit rough. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't expecting an easy ride when I signed up for this, nor am I even considering quitting at this point but this is tough.

My eyes are dry, itchy and sore. My eczema is still awful. I did go and see my GP for the steroid cream that I've been using for 3 days now but I haven't seen much of an improvement yet. Now it's on my feet, hands (especially my fingers), my wrists and my elbows. I have never experienced anything like it. If anything's going to make me give up it will be this.

No one can tell you how dry your lips are once you take this. I read countless logs with people telling me about this side effect but I definitely wasn't prepared for this.. Yesterday I went to a friends house without any lip balm. I was only there for 2 hours, but by the time I left my lips were dry, flakey and one side of my mouth was bleeding. My dad thought I had food on my lip. I had to tell him, no, that's just my face falling off.

Please don't think I'm moaning, no pain no gain, right? Also, for anyone else out there who's finding this hard, remember that nothing worth having comes easy, it's all about that final goal.


16th May-27th October 2013

15 Years Old/Female/52kg

Month 1- 20mg

Month 2- 40mg

Month 3- 40mg

Month 4- 50mg

Month 5 and 1/2- 50mg

Also see page 4 on my log for the before and after photos :)

"You can't make a rainbow without a little rain"


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Sorry to read you're having a rough ride. Just hang in there :) the early days seem to go really slow, but before you know it you'll be approaching the end of the course. Out of all the lip stuff I tried, I found the Blistex ammonia treatment worked the best. If you want me to tell you the proper name, let me know and ill grab it from my make up bag and have a look. Think it was under a fiver from Boots.

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Thanks for the support :) I believe that's the one I have! It's Blistex relief cream, aromatic ammonia solution or something vaguely along those lines. I agree, that's the best thing I've tried.

Day 46 (if my maths is correct!)

My skin looks bloody awful: I am breeeeeaaking out like crazy. I've read that this happens to people after their dosage has been increased and mine's just been doubled so I guess that'd explain it.

Not much change side effects wise. I went to my doctor and have been using a strong steroid cream for almost two weeks. My hands and elbows are almost back to normal (hooray!) and my feet have improved (although the skin on my feet is still a little itchy and is unbelievably tough and dry). Just when I thought it was all getting better I ran out of the cream goaway.gif I have an appointment with my GP in two days and in the meantime I'm using hydrocortisone cream. Obviously, I'll keep you updated :)

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16th May-27th October 2013

15 Years Old/Female/52kg

Month 1- 20mg

Month 2- 40mg

Month 3- 40mg

Month 4- 50mg

Month 5 and 1/2- 50mg

Also see page 4 on my log for the before and after photos :)

"You can't make a rainbow without a little rain"


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Day 52

Went to my GP and got two more tubes of steroid cream which seems to be really helping my feet.

The cream I've been using is Betnovate RD Cream, here's a little pic for youuu

post-197330-0-15364100-1373212623.png

My skin is really bothering me now. I am going on holiday in a few weeks and I want nothing more than to stand in front of a camera and feel vaguely good about my appearance. It doesn't look like that will be happening this year with my skin looking so disgusting.

Is there anything I can do to help my acne at this stage?

I know I shouldn't really use powerful spot treatments, but has anyone has any success with treating acne with anything whilst on Accutane? I know I have to be patient and just let this drug work it's magic, but I'm finding this quite difficult to handle.

Please suggest anything you can guys, I'm getting desperate.

Edited by EatsRainbows

16th May-27th October 2013

15 Years Old/Female/52kg

Month 1- 20mg

Month 2- 40mg

Month 3- 40mg

Month 4- 50mg

Month 5 and 1/2- 50mg

Also see page 4 on my log for the before and after photos :)

"You can't make a rainbow without a little rain"


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You are not alone hun. Unfortunately for many people, a horrendous IB is just a part of the process. All i can say is to stick with it and try to go about your everyday life. What helped me when i was on accutane and things weren't going great was telling myself that apart from making sure i took my pills and moisturized my face, everything else was out of my control. This made me feel less guilty about the condition of my face and i wasn't too busy blaming the weather, humidity, food, etc, etc, etc.

By the third and fourth month, things should start looking up


It's a rocky road but like everything else in life, there is always a beginning and an end. Here's to finding my end.

God is good to me..........more than I deserve.

James 1:2-4

Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.


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You are not alone hun. Unfortunately for many people, a horrendous IB is just a part of the process. All i can say is to stick with it and try to go about your everyday life. What helped me when i was on accutane and things weren't going great was telling myself that apart from making sure i took my pills and moisturized my face, everything else was out of my control. This made me feel less guilty about the condition of my face and i wasn't too busy blaming the weather, humidity, food, etc, etc, etc.

By the third and fourth month, things should start looking up

Really appreciate the encouragement, thank you :) Trying to stay positive.

I just had a thought. I'm taking Dianette to control my acne too. I used to take my BC pills in the morning, but since I've been taking my Roacc pills in the evening after dinner, I've been taking my BC in the evening too. This means that the time I take it can vary from 5-7:00 each day. They do say that you should take your BC pills at the same time every day, so is there a possibility that the varying times I've been taking them has been confusing my hormones and therefore messing up my skin?


16th May-27th October 2013

15 Years Old/Female/52kg

Month 1- 20mg

Month 2- 40mg

Month 3- 40mg

Month 4- 50mg

Month 5 and 1/2- 50mg

Also see page 4 on my log for the before and after photos :)

"You can't make a rainbow without a little rain"


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Day 56

It occurred to me today that this log is pretty much just me moaning about all this, and for that I'm sorry, I doubt it makes interesting reading :/

I have been feeling down recently but I'm almost sure that this is due to the horrific condition of my skin, rather than the drug making me depressed.

I have been very achey these last few days. It's been worst in my lower back but also my knees and the join where the top of my leg meets my hip have been hurting.

I had a hospital appointment yesterday, she decided not to increase my dosage due to the side effects I've been having and I'm glad she made that decision because I really can't take my skin getting worse before my holiday.

It's reached a point where I can go through the information booklet and tick off the side effects I've had.

Dry, bleeding lips. Check.

Dry skin. Check.

Eczema. Check.

Dry inside of nose. Check.

Initial worsening of skin. Check.

Dry and itchy eyes. Check.

Mood swings. Check.

Aches and pains. Check.

Arggggh I'm really sorry, I sound so negative. I've actually been lucky, my blood tests came back okay and there are far worse things that I could be experiencing, I just hate this so much. I think I'll begin to cope with the side effects better once my skin improves and I start to get my positive outlook on life back.eusa_pray.gif

Edited by EatsRainbows

16th May-27th October 2013

15 Years Old/Female/52kg

Month 1- 20mg

Month 2- 40mg

Month 3- 40mg

Month 4- 50mg

Month 5 and 1/2- 50mg

Also see page 4 on my log for the before and after photos :)

"You can't make a rainbow without a little rain"


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Yeah just hang in there, you're still relatively early in the treatment so just take it one day at a time and keep going as long as the side effects remain bearable. In the end you'll have much better skin and no side effects, just focus on that.

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Yeah just hang in there, you're still relatively early in the treatment so just take it one day at a time and keep going as long as the side effects remain bearable. In the end you'll have much better skin and no side effects, just focus on that.

God, I love you guys, thanks Tim smile.png

Day 57

My chin is by far the worst area of my face so I've been using a lot less moisturiser on it in an attempt to dry it out. Now my spots are all surrounded by a dry, flakey ring of dead skin which just adds to the disgusting look of my skin.

Today I have noticed, not just one, but three people looking at my chin rather than my eyes as they talk to me. Yes, I know I have acne. Yes, I know it's horrible, but please have the decency not to stare at it... I hate this.

When I started this log I'd hoped to update you guys with pictures but I'm really sorry I just can't make myself do it. However, I will be more than happy to post photos when my skin improves, if that day ever comes.

I never thought it would hurt so much to smile. The combination of my ridiculously dry face and sore lips makes smiling a painful experience, not that I've been smiling all that much these days anyway.

This morning things reached a whole new low. I had an argument with my mum. It sounds silly but I got an award in this ceremony at school and I'm supposed to go up in front of a hall full of people and get it. I refused to go the the ceremony because I really can't face an audience of people with my skin looking like this. I didn't quite explain this to my mum though because I feel like she doesn't understand what I'm going through. She thought I was refusing to go because I was ungrateful about receiving an award. By the end of the argument with her I was sobbing and I eventually told her the real reason why I don't want to go. She was really understanding and I wish I had just told her in the first place.

In conclusion, instead of going out on Thursday night to receive a prestigious award in front of a hall full of parents and my peers, I will be sitting at home with a bag of Doritos. Thanks acne.

Spots, can you not? Rant over.

Edited by EatsRainbows

16th May-27th October 2013

15 Years Old/Female/52kg

Month 1- 20mg

Month 2- 40mg

Month 3- 40mg

Month 4- 50mg

Month 5 and 1/2- 50mg

Also see page 4 on my log for the before and after photos :)

"You can't make a rainbow without a little rain"


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No problem :) but I think you should reconsider going to the award ceremony. I know how it feels to want to hide away in your room when your skin is bad to avoid social events and everytime I've done that I've felt like crap about it afterwards. More recently, I've been going wherever I'm invited regardless of how my skin looked and it can be tough at times but it's so much better than hiding away from everyone. Now nobody has given me any awards or anything (congratulations) but if I was in your shoes, I'd feel much better if I went and faced my anxiety then if I played it safe and avoided the whole thing. At the end of the day, it's just skin and although people may look, they don't care about your acne. Even if they did, it would be their problem, not yours.

I'm not saying it's easy and you just gotta suck it up and go, it will probably be really uncomfortable at times and it'll be a challenge. I just think you should meet it head on, accept your award and enjoy it. Again, just remember that it's not permanent, you're already addressing the problem. It's just a matter of time.

So when you're on your way home at the end of the night and you have that trophy/plaque/certificate/cookie/whatever in your lap, I bet you'll be glad that you went and got it. I totally get not wanting to go, but you can hadle it.

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Your "before" pictures look a lot like what my skin looks lie now.. I was wondering, was it very dry then? I find that muy skin is always feeling so irritated and looks super red (either from dryness or from hyperpigmentation underneath the spots).

I feel so ridiculously sensitive and embarrassed about my appearance most of the time. But I'm going away on holiday next week and even though I'd love for it to be clear I know it's just not going to be. Anyway, I've seen what having this problem has done to me recently, becoming basically a shut in during daytime, keeping my head down in public... and I'm pretty sure it's just making me feel worse. I really hope you went to your awards ceremony because as hard as it seems to overcome, it's really horrible to let something like your acne completely overtake your life.

Tim's response to this actually made me cry, I'm so emotional these days.. He's so right about facing the anxiety.

I'm typically pretty calm about things, hardly ever crying... but I think it comes from just really really knowing what it feels like to be so embarrassed and ashamed even, and how horrible it is that any of us have to feel that way. :(

Anyway, this is depressing! haha! I guess I just wanted to let you know that (yet another) person is dealing with the same self-confidence issues (and itchy face!) as you right now... *sending virtual hugs* :)

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My BCP Diary -


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Go get that award. I know what it feels like to not want to go out in public because of my skin, but you CANNOT stop living! life will go on either way. I've learned that I have to take joy out of what I can in life becaue I definitely have not learned to take joy from my skin and appearance. So things like awards and honors can bring you a little joy in your life. No matter what your skin looks like, it feels good to get an award. Believe me, I was valedictorian and got to make a speech in front of an entire stadium of people. Of course I hated my skin but guess what? Most people could barely see my face much less my skin because they were so far away in the stadium, and my class who could see my skin since they were on the ground really didn't give a crap because they were graduating and guess what? they only cared about themselves! I also got so many kudos on my speech...everyone said it was "epic" and unforgettable because I really did try to make it the funnest and best speech I could think of. Did I want to go stand in front of all those people with bad skin? No. Did I end up enjoying the experience? Yes. Do I regret making the speech? No. Would I have regretted not making the speech? yes. GET THAT AWARD.

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I just read your entire log and can totally relate. It sounds like we are about the same size and on the same dosage of Accutane. I am in my fifth month now and am 30 years old but it sounds like we have had similar side effects.

I can tell you that my second and third months were the worst. I had a lot of trouble with eczema and body aches, especially my lower back and hips. In my case, those issues mostly resolved on their own in my fourth month so hopefully the same will happen for you. When my lips were at their worst I used hydrocortisone ointment on them and it really helped, brought them nearly back to normal. You could probably try the cream if you have it but I like the ointment because it goes on clear like lip balm. (Follow the directions on the label though--you're not supposed to use it too much). My only problems now are fatigue and I'm a little emotional. I'm just buying time until I can get off this stuff....but my skin is CLEAR. You will get there too!

Good luck to you!

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Wow. I'm amazed that anyone actually reads my log, but the fact that complete strangers took the time to help me out with all this is utterly incredible. I sat here and cried at how kind and helpful you people are and I am so grateful for all your responses, thank you so much.

I want you all to know that I genuinely changed my mind about going to the award ceremony for a second there. That was until I got up and looked in the mirror where I burst into tears and quickly changed my mind back again. I'm so sorry, now I feel like I'm not only letting my parents down, but also all you amazing people who took the time to try and help me improve my life. I'm so disappointed in myself.

Thinking about this has made me realise how much I've let my skin control my life the past couple of years. I may not be going to the awards ceremony, but in a couple of weeks I'm doing an exchange programme and staying with a host family for 2 weeks. I hate meeting new people because I feel like they'll judge me because of my skin so this will be a massive challenge for me. I did even have thoughts of cancelling that too but these replies have made me realise that people out their believe in me even when I don't believe in myself and for that I am eternally grateful.

Your "before" pictures look a lot like what my skin looks lie now.. I was wondering, was it very dry then? I find that muy skin is always feeling so irritated and looks super red (either from dryness or from hyperpigmentation underneath the spots).

I feel so ridiculously sensitive and embarrassed about my appearance most of the time. But I'm going away on holiday next week and even though I'd love for it to be clear I know it's just not going to be. Anyway, I've seen what having this problem has done to me recently, becoming basically a shut in during daytime, keeping my head down in public... and I'm pretty sure it's just making me feel worse. I really hope you went to your awards ceremony because as hard as it seems to overcome, it's really horrible to let something like your acne completely overtake your life.

Tim's response to this actually made me cry, I'm so emotional these days.. He's so right about facing the anxiety.

I'm typically pretty calm about things, hardly ever crying... but I think it comes from just really really knowing what it feels like to be so embarrassed and ashamed even, and how horrible it is that any of us have to feel that way. sad.png

Anyway, this is depressing! haha! I guess I just wanted to let you know that (yet another) person is dealing with the same self-confidence issues (and itchy face!) as you right now... *sending virtual hugs* smile.png

I think my skin looks dry because I took that photo straight after washing my face because my skin used to be very oily (especially my t-zone) smile.png

Thanks for your response, I find it comforting to know that I'm not the only person out there who's struggling with all this and I just hope that one day we can all get to a point where acne is no longer a problem. Unfortunately, acne is still a problem for me and this time, I just couldn't face up to it. One day in the future I'll beat this bitch, I know I will. *hugs returned!* and thanks again smile.png

I just read your entire log and can totally relate. It sounds like we are about the same size and on the same dosage of Accutane. I am in my fifth month now and am 30 years old but it sounds like we have had similar side effects.

I can tell you that my second and third months were the worst. I had a lot of trouble with eczema and body aches, especially my lower back and hips. In my case, those issues mostly resolved on their own in my fourth month so hopefully the same will happen for you. When my lips were at their worst I used hydrocortisone ointment on them and it really helped, brought them nearly back to normal. You could probably try the cream if you have it but I like the ointment because it goes on clear like lip balm. (Follow the directions on the label though--you're not supposed to use it too much). My only problems now are fatigue and I'm a little emotional. I'm just buying time until I can get off this stuff....but my skin is CLEAR. You will get there too!

Good luck to you!

Congratulations on the clear skin! This response was so helpful, the thought of putting up with this for many more months was killing you (and yes I know everyone's different but it's so promising to hear that you got through this and came out the other side with skin to be proud of! smile.png )

Ohhh I'll definitely look into hydrocortisone ointment for my lips if they get much worse. Thank you and good luck with the last bit of your course too! smile.png

Day 60 (2 monthsss!!)

No big changes in side effects. My back was aching like crazy today, I don't think it's helped by the fact that I'm so tired (got that end of term feeling!). Eczema wise, looking pretty good. Still using steroid cream on my feet but only once every one/two days as the irritation is nearly gone. The skin on my feet's a bit weird, all the areas that were covered with red lumps a few weeks ago are now covered with skin that's falling off. I think it's a good thing, like I'm shedding the old layer of horrible skin and hopefully making way for some normal-looking flip flop feet!

My mood has been a lot better today, thanks to all you beautiful people. The acne on my cheeks seems to be getting better (no change on my chin though) and the PIH seems to be fading too.

Thank you again to everyone who has written to me so far and to everybody out there who is reading this. I feel like I've developed a kind of virtual safety net of people who are willing to listen to me moan and moan and moan. I can tell you things that I can't tell anyone else because I feel like you people truly understand what I'm going through. Muchas gracias amigos ;)


16th May-27th October 2013

15 Years Old/Female/52kg

Month 1- 20mg

Month 2- 40mg

Month 3- 40mg

Month 4- 50mg

Month 5 and 1/2- 50mg

Also see page 4 on my log for the before and after photos :)

"You can't make a rainbow without a little rain"


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get that award and i promise u will feel good.

u will regret not doing so later,which none of us want!

stay calm(use self hypnosis if needed).

and just take care of ur diet and water intake along with the meds,topicals u use.

i was on accutane and it does effect health in more than one ways.

*hugs from me too*


Itchy red raised skin - dermatitis??

huge pores

indented scar

oils used for cooking

inflamed whiteheads & clogged pores

my balanced diet chart and skincare routine(medications taken & products used now)


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Day 62

My mum just doesn't understand me. I know that's like the most stereotypical thing that all teenagers say but it's so true at the moment. Yesterday I came home from school early because my back was aching so much and I felt like I hadn't slept for 3 weeks... but I've slept loads. Everything just felt so weak and tired.

Anyway, she just looked at me and asked me "is all this really worth it?". She has obviously never had acne.


16th May-27th October 2013

15 Years Old/Female/52kg

Month 1- 20mg

Month 2- 40mg

Month 3- 40mg

Month 4- 50mg

Month 5 and 1/2- 50mg

Also see page 4 on my log for the before and after photos :)

"You can't make a rainbow without a little rain"


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