Hi, this is my first post here. I'm a 17 (18 next month) years old boy who had pretty severe acne. However, after dealing with it for almost a year and a half i got prescribed accutane. I had been on accutane for 10 months, as i finished last july. I really thought it was a miracle, my face was completely clean, and i only had the scars, that i planned to treat this winter. However, my acne has come back. Since december, i started to have little breakouts that didn't really bother me. After christmas my face gotten worse, it's been getting really oily and dirty since then, so i started with the regimen. But this last three weeks my face has completely changed to the worst (not like pre-accutane, but quite bad). I went to the dermatologist and put me on doxycycline for two months (I'm not taking it since i've been told that when it's done the breakouts will be much worse), as they won't put me on accutane again (even though i didn't even reach the right dosis 6800/7800 mg)
So here i am, i don't know what to do, i'm so depressed, i don't wanna leave home, and i need to get really high marks this year, but i can't study, i can't stop thinking about my acne, i've been crying for days. I really don't know what to do, i have the healthiest diet, drink 2l of water everyday, clean my face twice a day, don't smoke or drink alcohol, i don't exercise much though (but i do exercise a bit).
I know that i just have mild to moderate acne now, but I just start thinking how everything is gonna evolve, and if my acne will be worse than before or if it will ever fade away (i know it's genetic, i got it from my dad, who still has to deal sometimes with cystic acne), i don't know, i think i just lost the hope. I really feel this stupid thing is taking my "best years" away, i want my skin to be like it was just a few months ago, but i can't help to be so self conscious, i just can't.
I don't know what i'm gonna do, but now i have my acne back + mild depression + all the stress because of the marks, and there are moments when i just wanna jump off the window, and i'm not even joking.