21 replies to this topic

[Rafiki3]

I apologize if this is the wrong thread and for writing such a long post. I just can't take this anymore. I first started getting acne 4 years ago towards the end of sophomore year in high school. Now I am in my 2nd year of university and I've missed out on so much of my life because of acne - mainly the red spots/scars that it has left me with.

I've ALWAYS had and gotten these horrible red marks and spots. I've been to a dermatologist 3 times and it's NEVER helped me really. I have been on tretinoin and BP along with pills before. Perhaps it's helped control my breakouts but I still seem to ALWAYS get a whitehead of something on a cheek and then that just ruins my whole day because I KNOW that whenever it goes away it will leave a discolored ugly mark. I believe BP is NOT good for me because I have heard it marks redness stay longer and is not good for spots. I suppose I still get a bit of active acne but it just feels like everything turns into a spot or whatever they are.

I truly do not even know where a lot of these little ugly red spots came from. I don't recall having acne in those spots. It's so weird, but I must have. These are honestly worse than acne to me because I'm stuck with them day in and day out. Maybe some I had originally 3 years ago have faded I really don't know. But it seems like none are ever improving and they will never go away. I also see from some pictures I have indents. Those are scars right? I am stuck with those? When I feel my face its basically smooth, but after taking these pictures, I see I have a lot that are 'in' my skin. That makes me even more depressed. As you can see it looks absolutely disgusting. Under certain lighting it's even worse. These bright red spots on my face seem permanent and I can't take it anymore. I'm absolutely sick of it. It ruins my face on both side of my cheeks and jaw and even under my jaw a bit. I have lived a boring alone life for the last 4 years because of this. I stay inside all the time and can't be a normal university student.

I'm going to be halfway through university soon and I look like an ugly teenager still in high school with acne. Everyone else looks like an adult, with smooth beautiful skin and all the other men have typical skin, nice scruff or a bit of roughness to their skin with no acne problems. Why can't I just be like that? What did I do to deserve this. I honestly dread waking up some days. In high school I always prayed this would be gone by university so I could be a new person. It's funny, I had some friends who had acne too, maybe not the red spots like mine but they had problems. Now I see them on Facebook and they are completely clear and enjoying university life...

I haven't shaved in 2 years because I am scared to go over my horrible skin and red spots. Plus when I did use to shave regardless of what I do I would always get some whiteheads afterwards which would turn into more discolored skin. I've been trimming my hair, not that it matters becuase my facial hair isn't normal. It grows in patches and scraggly, hard to describe but that's not the main point of this.

For the ones that are indented, is the color in them ever going to go away? I have seen people with indents from acne but it's not red, they're the same color as the person's skin. Why are mine different? I'm EXTREMELY depressed and I just want some solid advice. Are the red spots and these all of my marks scars, PIH, roscaea, or what? It seems like they will NEVER go away. I know my skin will never be nice like everyone elses. I just want to have a somewhat normal, enjoyable life already and I can't have any confidence until I can look a LITTLE better. I can NEVER be up close with someone so therefore my social skills suck because I hate having conversations while I see people examine my face with their eyes. Plus I will never have a girlfriend when I look like this. I just want to know what to do. Nothing seems to help. As of lately I have broken out bad because of stressing over university work and the fact I look so disgusting. And the acne i got from the stress has probably led to more of these ugly spots and discolored marks. It's like I'm trapped...

I need to know what this all is and what to do. I'm completely desperate at this point. Overall my life has been miserable for the past 4 years. Every single day I have lived I have thought about my disgusting face for a good portion of the day and I hate the person I've become because of this. I want to change in the next year and enjoy life and I need to get this all figured out and fixed for good so I can't get a bit of confidence back. These pictures don't do the marks justice. They look worse sometimes, and I didn't get my full cheeks which may have missed some other spots I have.

If I could just get rid of these horrible bright red spots and discolored marks I could live a somewhat normal happy life. What do I have and what do I need to do?

PLEASE HELP

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Edited by Rafiki3, 06 January 2013 - 05:34 PM.

[andrewbleah]

Scars + pih,i can't see any rosacea.
The pih will fade in time , if you want to cut some time of that frame make sure to use daily sunscree,aha and even retin-a or differin.
for the scars i would reccomend laser tratment .

[Rafiki3]

Can I go ahead and do laser treatment now? I am 20 years old. And is that something that effectively gets rid of scars and brings the skin back to the same surface? Or does it just get rid of the color in the scar?

I am using sunscreen and a tretinoin but it never seems to look any different. I have more scars than pih right? What would be a good AHA and how do I use that?

I can't live with this anymore I will do anything. More insight to laser treatment would be appreciated.

Would Accutane make any sense? I still get active acne every once in a while? Accutane would not do anything for pih and/or scars though?

Edited by Rafiki3, 07 January 2013 - 04:21 PM.

[drewfish01]

By any chance do you have social anxiety?

[Rafiki3]

I've never been diagnosed for anything like that, why do you ask? I would say my acne has changed me as a person and while I wouldn't put 100% blame on it, I would put like 90%. I know my life could have and currently could be so much different and better if I didn't look like this. The marks and scars have definitely affected me negatively socially and that's why I am here pleading for help so I can try to shake all of this and get somewhat clear for the future because with how things are going, it makes me very depressed and worried. Sometimes I can't even describe the anger and pain I feel and I'm trapped

Someone please answer my previous post?

Edited by Rafiki3, 07 January 2013 - 09:52 PM.

[whoartthou1]

I feel your pain brother. I feel your pain

[Rafiki3]

Someone help me I hate myself. I'm scared for my future. I can't function normally I have no self confidence. My skin is never going to be like a normal person but I just want to reduce these marks on my face to be able to hold a conversation with someone face to face and not feel like killing myself. I hide every day and resent everyone else in my classes for hacing normal nice skin. I'm scared and unsure of what to try to do because every recommendation I get that sounds good, I find a thread with bad side effects or that it made someone worse. I don't even know where that freakin big red patch scar came from. It's new and I'm so mad.

I'm at the end of my line I need to reduce these marks or otherwise I know ill never have a social life and never get a wife or be successful or make my family proud. Why me

[Rafiki3]

SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME GOD

[IvyHawk]

The best, risk-free remedie is to find something you love to do. It will truly help free you. At one point, My red marks were very similar to yours. They showed absolutely no improvement. Then I took up Guitar, Piano, and concentrated on Acedemics. Make your life worth living.

 

You say you want to kill yourself. So why are you scared about Treatment side-effects? The WORST that they can do is kill you. And only Hydroquinone has Ever been seen to cause severe Ailment. What I use for my marks is as follows:

 

I put a Glycerol Alpha Hydroxy (8%) on my red-marks. I leave this on over night. When I wake up, I rub my skin with a dry wash cloth until my face is clean. Then, I put on a sunscreen. The particular one I use has vitamins A, C, &E in them. (remember this by the abbreviation "ACE") This sunscreen also has Aloe-vera and is Oil-free. (The brand name is Aveeno) 

 

Most importantly, no treatments offer results over-night. Stick with it. After three months, my red marks were about half as bad.

 

Don't mind all those fair-skinned people. Sure, some might think they are better than you. But they are not. Not even for a second.

 

Motivate yourself. Do well in school. At my College, no one cares about your skin. But it is a right of passage to be a top student here. 

 

Your family should already love and be proud of you. If not, find a group of people that are.

 

If you motivate yourself and realize that you are more than your face: I will see you, one day, standing in the Hall of Fame.

 

And I mean that.

Edited by IvyHawk, 05 February 2013 - 06:11 PM.

[whoartthou1]

The best, risk-free remedie is to find something you love to do. It will truly help free you. At one point, My red marks were very similar to yours. They showed absolutely no improvement. Then I took up Guitar, Piano, and concentrated on Acedemics. Make your life worth living.

 

You say you want to kill yourself. So why are you scared about Treatment side-effects? The WORST that they can do is kill you. And only Hydroquinone has Ever been seen to cause severe Ailment. What I use for my marks is as follows:

 

I put a Glycerol Alpha Hydroxy (8%) on my red-marks. I leave this on over night. When I wake up, I rub my skin with a dry wash cloth until my face is clean. Then, I put on a sunscreen. The particular one I use has vitamins A, C, &E in them. (remember this by the abbreviation "ACE") This sunscreen also has Aloe-vera and is Oil-free. (The brand name is Aveeno) 

 

Most importantly, no treatments offer results over-night. Stick with it. After three months, my red marks were about half as bad.

 

Don't mind all those fair-skinned people. Sure, some might think they are better than you. But they are not. Not even for a second.

 

Motivate yourself. Do well in school. At my College, no one cares about your skin. But it is a right of passage to be a top student here. 

 

Your family should already love and be proud of you. If not, find a group of people that are.

 

If you motivate yourself and realize that you are more than your face: I will see you, one day, standing in the Hall of Fame.

 

And I mean that.

Great post

 

BTW, what type of severe side effects can hydroquonine cause?

[IvyHawk]

Thanks, lol.

 

Hydroquonine was banned by the EU for causing Cancer.

 

It is generally used as an industrial metal cleaner anyway.

[Zusak]

Mild ones only frustrates you because lack of results, thats why it requires stronger products.

 

Suggesting http://www.makeupartistschoice.com

Edited by Zusak, 06 February 2013 - 04:26 PM.

[Rafiki3]

Thank you for your post. I just can't get my mind off this though. I want to be normal I just will never be able to interact with others face to face in society when I am so red, indented and in confident. I will try anything I guess.

Is there anything that can help indented scars that are red? I have done TONS of reading hear and have either found that indented scars are a lost cause or that people who said they have indented scars don't even have any problems and just red dots that are pih and will go away on their own.

Please help me

I don't even look in mirrors anymore because it destroys my day. Ill never be normal for the rest of my life and it hurts deep inside. I can't explain the pain I feel. I need to try to get this redness GONE its a million times worse than acne. I hide at home because I can't bear society. It's much more complex than "suck it up and don't care". I appreciate and acknowledge those viewpoints but I simply cannot do that. Maybe someone understands. Please help god bless

[IvyHawk]

Please don't think that I'm telling you to just 'Suck it Up'.

 

I have red-marks about the same as you. AHA will get rid of the redness within 8 months. However, more aggressive treatments are required for indents (But it can be done. My sister completely eradicated hers, and they were worse than yours.)

 

Also, My friend has REALLY bad scarring. I'm talking about 5X as worse as yours. However, all the girls flock to him. Why? He has a GREAT personality. You are not a failure because of your scars. Just try to take that first step in breaking out of your shell. It won't be easy, but it is well worth it.

[Green Gables]

Laser. Only thing that can actually give you normal skin again. You will pay $$$$ for it...but it will be worth it.

[Rafiki3]

I don't understand what I did to deserve this. It consumes my life now. What laser do I need, I am desperate. Everyday I try to be optimistic but when I see myself in the mirror I can't even describe how I feel anymore. I will never be able to enjoy life and start maturing and growing up with an appearance like this. I am so scared.

What lasers do I need will they help or am I going to look like this forever. I am seriously scared. I plan to see a derm soon and tell them how I feel but I truly don't think any person can feel my pain at this point oh my god. What did I do to deserve horrible red indented scarring all over my cheeks? What did I do to deserve clogged pores and facial hair that grows disgustingly?

Please help thank you god bless.

[IvyHawk]

Bro, you don't have to do anything to deserve something. Some things just happen. 

 

Anyway, Im nut sure what laser you need. I would look it up on the interwebs or ask that derm of yours.

 

And don't be scared. If you have the $$$ then im pretty sure laser treatment will help.

 

And up until then, apply Alpha Hydroxy to your scars overnight. 

[Wasawawa]

Pretty much the same boat as you bro. I'm 18 and in college in the U.S. I know about the social issues over acne. It has made me introverted when I am naturally an extrovert. I definitely know it has hurt me in the girl department. But probably more because of my insecurities. I think about my acne/scars all the time and I think about what others think about my face all the time. It's like some sixth sense shit. It fucking sucks. I want to be more sociable but it holds me back. I was talking with someone about my scars one time and they said there are people with cancer out there that are living life to the fullest with no care in the world. Or children without parents and food. I think the real truth behind all this pain is that it will all balance out, whether in this life or the next. Keep your head up man. I'm trying to keep my depression/insecurity over acne scars in my back pocket while I pursue music and other things. Currently I'm on retin-a and it has helped my acne but I'm thinking about going to a derm to ask about laser or microderm treatments. One day we will have beautiful skin and we will be even greater people because we know what pain is.

[Rafiki3]

Thanks man. Ya this is all I think about. I look fine in the dark, like I think I actually look good if light is very dim. But when I'm in those bright lighted areas like classroom I am dying because I know how red and uneven I look and it just makes no sense because everyone else is perfectly smooth. I've been on tretinoin for a while which is basically retin a and it hasn't helped redness at all. Furthermore I learned it thins the skin which makes it weaker and more prone to problems. I believe this is true because I just got a damn white head on my cheek and I can tell its going to leave a nice mark or scar that will last forever like the rest I have. Just wonderful....

Even when my mind is able to not focus on my acne scars, it's still in the back of my head. I'm literally trapped in my own mind and can't live. I hide on weekends and don't have any friends at this point because I can't be face to face with anyone. I will never have a relationship I can't believe this. All I want is normal pores, less scars and normal facial hair. But nope. It's so discouraging because AHA thins skin like retin a. It seems every possible solution is harmful and I just know my scars have somehow gotten so bad and indented and red that ill be like this probably forever. I can just tell my skin is different I don't get it. I wish so badly I just had a normal guys rough skin. God DAMMIT

I NEED TO MAKE A DERM APPT BUT IDK WHAT TO EZPECT. EVEY POSSIBLE SOKUTION SEEMS DANGEROUS AND MAY MAKE THINGS WORSE. AT THIS POINT I MIGHT AS WELL TRY BUT IT HURTS DEEPLY INSIDE TO KNOW ANY PPSSIBLE FIX TO THIS UNBELIEVABLE SCARRING MAY NOT WORK OR CAUSE IT TO BE WORSE.

This is the worst pain ever in life. I will never have a normal life. I still have many years but if I can't live normally now I am scared I will not be able to create a normal future. My god I just don't understand. Thank you all god bless.

[IvyHawk]

AHA is supposed to thing the skin. Seriously, that's how you get rid of scars: By peeling away the top layers of the skin to get to the fresh and un-damaged layers.

 

God bless you too.