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My Life Is A Nightmare

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#1 notacnefree

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Posted 21 December 2012 - 01:38 AM

It all started when I became 14. My face was breaking out, acne everywhere. My forehead looked like a pizza. I was not insecure about it, but then it started and alle the people around me were laughing and making fun of me. Even my FAMILY. When I went to school I was spending the time all alone, cause I was scared to get teased again about that. Okay, so it goes over 3 or 4 years and I've tried every single product and someday the acne was gone, but I think the credit goes to none of these products. In 2005 my life was nearly perfect. "Normal" skin, maybe a little bit uneven. Here the story could end, but no, the nightmare began. In 2009 I got a red zit on my nose and I was so happy that I was acne free and I went to a doctor to get it removed. I said: could you remove it via laser? No, that would leave a bigger scar. We cut it out and you won't see anything. It looked horrible. Like a chucky-scar from that movie. I was so sad and I can't believe what the doctor did to me. I tried lasers and at the end of the day kyrotherapy was the one thing that changed the appearance a little bit. Someday I thought: okay, you have that stupid scar on your nose, so get your moles and one thing from your forehead removed. The drama goes on. Red marks after laser treatment and the acne mark that was on my forehead was just a red tiny mark and now there is a hole in the center of my forhead. And when people tell me it's not that bad, I don't believe them, cause 99% of the people were making fun of me in the past and today these people are older and they don't tell things as they are. I'm really really worried about my life and my family does not understand that. Maybe you can help me!!!
Here are some pictures.

#2 Rawhide

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Posted 21 December 2012 - 02:36 AM

Can't see any pics

#3 notacnefree

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Posted 21 December 2012 - 03:02 AM

Posted Image

as for the scars from the laser treatment i will upload them very soon

#4 Ilovemesomevanity

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Posted 22 December 2012 - 12:00 AM

OHMYGOD YOURE A MONSTER

.....so wheres the horrible acne/scars you were talking about??

#5 notacnefree

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Posted 01 January 2013 - 10:34 AM

Now I wish I just have this ONE scar! After the mole removal thing there was one growing back and the docter lasered a zit beneath it instead of removing the mole! -.- The doctor corrected that hole on my forehead... nothing happened.And now I have a scar where I had a fucking pimple!!! That would have gone away on its on
That was in in october now I went to hamburg to get treatment for that forehead scar and he used a fractional laser for it and he did my nose. Now look under my nose scar there is peeling or whatever and it looks like some of the "normal" skin is also peeling. NEW SCARS?! Its so horrible. http://www.bilder-up...-1357056847.jpg, http://www.bilder-up...-1357057135.jpg

http://www.bilder-upload.eu/show.php?file=aea6bc-1357057424.jpg all the redness started in september and i think it will never ever fade away. Maybe I will have some white big spots there -.- The fractional laser treatment is 2 weeks ago. Is it normal that I still have this "peelinglook" it looks like someones stretching the skin. And some heathly skin is destroyed by that laser?! I have to say that I'm so depressed right now. Nobody cares about these things. I was so happy with ending my acne-thing in 2005 and now look at me...

you still can see my othes scars. I want to die. http://sphotos-f.ak....219831339_n.jpg That was before it happended. I still got these ance scars on my forehead but they were so tiny.

#6 Ilovemesomevanity

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Posted 01 January 2013 - 12:36 PM

OMG SHUT UP that last picture is so cute

and um, theres nothing there??? LOL really i only see like two spots, the ones where you went to the doc to get them removed, hmmmm coincidence? i think not. and yeah ive heard that laser surgery causes peeling and stuff, ive even heard depending on the surgery it can cause a ton of scabbing D: im not sure how long its supposed to last but make sure you wear sunscreen when you go out and stuff

stop getting all those treatments! just reading about them makes my face hurt omg. just let your skin take a breather for a while

but seriously your skins like pretty much clear! i dont understand how people made fun of you but stop being so depressed about your skin! easier said than done i know but at least dont let on that it bothers you so much, when people see you worrying about it you become an easy target

#7 notacnefree

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Posted 01 January 2013 - 01:32 PM

Actually I was removing 4 moles, one grew back and instead of doing it again he lasered a zit. Its near the nose
as you can see. So I have 4 red marks on my cheek. And one red mark above my lip. 5!!! And on deep scar in my forhead
wrinkle. I think theres no way I'm going to look the same again. I had good experiences with laser for other things so I
decided to get these face marks removed. But now it's like I'm in my early puberty. Oh I had a face full of acne back then
but just on my forehead. It looks really bad in closeup. Posted Image I start laughing when people say my forehead looks good when
you can clearly see thousands of mini marks on it. I'm ill at the moment so I kinda look fucked up but that just matches my mood right now: http://www.bilder-up...-1357067963.jpg

I'm really angry about the doctor lasering a fucking pimple. I mean it can heal without a scar. When you open something with a laser there is always a scar or a little thing. But I thought at first that will fade away. -.- When I now read storys like: you cant remove something without leaving a scar then i could cry, why cant a dermatologist cant see the difference between a mole and a zit?! I was calling the office and the assistant says: oh thats nothing to worry about... She hasn't got anything in her face... It's okay for me to have 2 or 3 scars, but when I look at others I have a lot of facial scars. And I don't know... can skin become the same as it was before?

The thing is I never ever worried about my skin. When it was very very very full of acne I didn't care but then it stared... one person says something and you dont care. The second says it and you dont care. But someday my family was asking me too what is wrong with your skin. And then I was buying all these crap.... nothing worked. After some years my skin changed and I dont think a product has done that. When I look back i was a pizza face. But when that can clear up why do my laser scars not heal?

Edited by notacnefree, 01 January 2013 - 01:36 PM.


#8 Ilovemesomevanity

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Posted 02 January 2013 - 03:08 AM

cuz lasers cause more damage than just regular topicals! id say just stop with the lasers! and i honestly cant see "thousands of mini marks" on your forehead, just that one from the scary laser

you probably just grew out of it! but really, i would stay away from the lasers, if the scars they left bother you that much just avoid the lasers causing them! and it doesnt seem like theyre really deep (ahem even though i can only see like two of them cough cough) so theyll probs fade with time! staahp worrying, you look guuud :D and you have good facial features so really be glad youre not butt ugly AND have acne hahaha

#9 Myadultacnecure

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Posted 13 January 2013 - 04:15 AM

You look fine. Seriously I would love to have your skin. WTF why am I cursed :'(

#10 Ella27

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Posted 13 January 2013 - 06:09 PM

It isn't as bad as you may think. :) Seriously I had a hard time searching and most people will too. I think you're drawn to it and point it out when in reality you'll probably have to tell someone where it is before they notice. I have the same problem.

#11 Pianina

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Posted 14 January 2013 - 01:02 PM

I don't see anything. You're perfectly fine.

#12 notacnefree

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Posted 17 January 2013 - 02:40 AM

I still see the pattern of the fractional laser on my nose and it looks like sandpaper. I have the feeling that it will never ever fade. And it's so hard because I had very bad acne on my forehead, someday it faded, but it took years and I was so happy that my skin was "okay", not perfect, but I was happy with it. I think childhood teasing is what brought me here again. I had like a small red thing on my nose and it ended with a surgery scar. Then I thought, oh you could look better when you remove your moles and a very very shallow red mark on my forehead, that only I was seeing. Now the laser has caused damage. And the thing on my forehead is very noticiable. It's like I've seen both, but now it's more noticiable. -.- And when the doctor corrected it, I asked him if he could laser a mole again that grows back. THE DOC lasered a fucking ZIT beneath it. And now there is a little red mark. A little one and maybe you wont see it, but it's there. And before christmas i was in hamburg doing fractional for that thing on my forehead and the nose scar. The foreheadscar looks a bit better but what I more worry about is the pattern look on my nose which isn't visible in pictures. Has anyone experience with that? Oh got, it helps me such much to write about it, cause here I find people who are dealing with the same thing as me, my family does not understand my worries. But they dont went through mobbing and all that stuff. When my skin was "okay" I felt so much better. I think I'm more sensitive because I know I had normal skin a while back in 2008 and please dont tell me it's my own fault, cause I know what worked for me, but I just wanted better and better skin -.- I truly wish everyone could have normal skin. I was so happy a while back and now I'm just thinking about suicide. I can't even be happy when I'm listening to my favourite songs or be happy that my favourite singer britney is again #1 in germany. Cause everyone thought I was crazy for liking her. I lost my life! I will alway have this pattern look on my nose and there are some white spots. And its so mean when people without any scar or acne are making fun of you. I would never do that, when I had acne free skin I wasn't doing it because I know how acne feels. I know how cruel people can be and when my skin is good it's like a "schutz" don|t know the english word and i know mz english is terrible right now.

#13 notacnefree

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Posted 24 April 2013 - 07:08 AM

here you can clearly see what damage the laser did to me. It looks very dry and now on the other nose side there is a zit or a gristle? Which I can clearly feel. I know there was some uneven point before but now it looks very yellowish. Here is the damage: http://dkm80tng5uqm9...200-1482464.jpg http://dkm80tng5uqm9...200-1482465.jpg http://dkm80tng5uqm9...200-1482465.jpg



#14 Lapis lazuli

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Posted 24 April 2013 - 08:03 AM

 I know how cruel people can be and when my skin is good it's like a "schutz" don|t know the english word and i know mz english is terrible right now.

 

Doesn't schutz mean a protection?



I don't see anything either to be perfectly honest.

 

I don't see anything. You're perfectly fine.