54 replies to this topic

[Sasch83]

That's the spirit. I think we all can recall the moment our skin changed. The upside of having acne though is that it makes us such better people on the inside. We look past peoples faults and reaize that what's on the inside is so much more important that whats showing on the outside.

Don't get me wrong, it still sucks to have acne but we are better people because of it. Also keep in mind that progress on accutane is not linear so you may do well one week and your skin can go to shit the next week. Thats how its been for me. Had a really good run of clearer skin up until week 8 and from then till now (week 11) my skin continues to get worse (i'm surmising this to be an initial breakout).It's tough but like you, I:

avoid mirrors

tell myself that the bad stuff has to come out before healing can start

recognize that inspite of having bad acne, there is probably someone out there who has it a bit worse.

Hope this helps. Any questions, feel free to PM me.

[Brownilocks]

So.... I'm getting back into my exercise routine FINALLY! Before the back pain was just exacerbated too much and its still there, but much more managable now. I really think that the additional water intake is helping with this and my other side effects. Getting a few tiny, quickly resolving white heads now, but no new major cysts. Just 2 on my temples that were there before have gotten bigger, redder, and itchier.. I wish all the old spots would hurry up and start going away!!! I wish these newly larger ones would come to a head so they would just drain or whatever and go away, but they are just big, sore, red spots for now and not budging. My old spots are still there, though less angry and not nearly as painful. My chin area isn't swollen like it was at the worst of it. My face isn't much improved from were it was before I started accutane but it is VASTLY improved from what it was a month ago when the IB had hit hard and I was a total and complete mess, so that HAS to be a good sign, right? The spots I still have don't seem to want to heal up just yet, but they do look a little flatter and calmer. I so, so, so want to get to a point where I can use makeup to cover up the redness a bit. I haven't worn any for almost 4 months now when this all started. As for other side effects, I'm getting pretty dry patches on my arms and my legs are kind of dry and itchy so I guess its time to start lotioning there now. Maybe more dryness is a good sign? I can't wait for time to fly by so I can look back on the progress! As of now (day 37) its just a waiting game and I'm slowly monitoring for improvement! Luckily I have my exercise now to occupy my mind again and get my thoughts off of it! As a side note, not sure if its just in my head or not, but right after I run it seems like my spots look a little smaller and better (less red). Like I'm sweating out some of the inflammation or something. Not sure if that's true or not, but I like to think so for my own sake!

[BMarieWantsNoAcne]

I'm not sure about the exercising, but for me when I first wake up my skin always looks really good. Once I start going about my day though, it seems worse... :/

[Brownilocks]

Day 45: No new pimples, save for one very tiny "normal" one near my hairline, but I've been exercising again lately and its probably from the sweat so no biggie. I'm definetely looking better than I was before! I looked back at my old images and have improved vastly from my worst point (2 weeks in) and also from day 30. Most of my cysts have popped now and are going down, but there are 3 that just sit there and will not go away! 1 by the left corner of my mouth has gotten a tiny bit smaller but still there without much improvement and the other was lingering for a couple months before blowing up and turning into a second one after I messed with it... I wish there was some way to get rid of the cysts faster... That's my biggest problem now... Its an improvement over the sore clusters of interconnected pustules but they still suck and hurt. I'm being positive though and welcome any improvement, so happy that I don't have the pain and constant soreness anymore!

I'm hoping that things will turn around soon. I want to get back out there and feel confident in public again. Hoping my derm can recommend something to get rid of these old, lingering monster zits soon. The cortisone shots just don't work for me. They do nothing and the zits either don't change or stall out for a week or 2 then come back even bigger and angrier than before... I'm tempted to ask to be bumped up on my dosage for month 3. I'm just not that dry. I moisturizer once a day if that and don't have flakes anywhere and my lips are no dryer than before. I had back pain at the end of month 1 but it only lasted a week and went away. The only crappy side effect is that my nose is really dry and crusty and cracked inside and I've got to apply vaseline inside of it twice a day to help with this, but otherwise I feel good so I'm not really scared about going up to 80mg at 50kg weight if need be. The pamphlet says you can go up to 100kg at my weight max, so this shouldn't be a problem if my derm agrees that I could use a higher dosage.

Oh well, just trying to keep calm and patient until them! Like BMarie has suggested in the past, I'm avoiding mirrors! The more I do it the more suprised I am by slight progress when I check myself out again later on! Stay tuned! Update again with new pics on day 60!

[BMarieWantsNoAcne]

I'm glad it is improving, and I hope those stinkers that don't want to leave skeedaddle soon!!

[Brownilocks]

So... day 48 (end of week 7) and I'm pondering on my treatment... My derm prescribed me pretty high dose accutane to start (60mg/day at 50kg weight) and I have either mild acne fulminans or pyoderma faciale according to both her and my second opinion doc, so per the internet it says its usually treated with prednisone and LOW dose accutane thats slowly ramped up... Maybe I would have been getting better results or not had such a severe IB had that been the course? I'm hoping I'm on the right treatment... Anyone else start that high with a similar condition or have a different treatment course than me with a similar condition? I'm hoping this is going to turn around soon. Old spots are better but still there and not going anywhere and still getting (small) cysts and several smaller whiteheads/pustules, some in the same old areas.... Back pain is very mininal now and only slightly achy after running, skin still really not very dry, scalp is staying dry like its been since week 1, lips are dry but not too bad, and only severe side effect is that my nose cracks and is sore if I don't apply vaseline twice a day.

HOW MUCH LONGER TO SEE NOTICEABLE RESULTS?! Grrrrrrrr............... Going on 4 months of looking like this now and I'm starting to get really pissed seeing this in the mirror every day! My husband says it doesn't bother him at all but I'm so tired of being an ugly wife.. I want my old face back so, so very bad.. Will I ever look the same again or will the remnants of this stay around forever? Just need a little encouragement and reassurance today...

[Sasch83]

I am in my thrid month and my face still breaks out in inflamed and small bumps with cysts every now and then. For you acne, it may take longer but for the most part, accutane should work for you to some extent. Keep your head up and try to stay positive. You are a beautiful soul with or without acne so don't allow your acne to let you think otherwise

[annetossy]

Try not to get discouraged! It'll get there!! Maybe talk to your doctor at your next appointment to get his/her opinion on why he started you so high? I'm sure they had reasons to?

I understand about the 'ugly wife' thing. I say the same thing to my husband. But it will get better!

[ughhhhh]

I'm having a bad day too My dr said I might need to be on 120mg by the time this is over (and he said likely a much longer treatment, like 10 months) because of my severity! I'm so upset and discouraged and feeling ugly and alone and scared.

[BMarieWantsNoAcne]

120 mg?? That's a lot! It seems like 80 mg is the most people get. I saw one person who had 100 mg, but he was a large guy. I don't think you should go on 120 mg...

[ughhhhh]

Yea I'm not sure why my derm said that, how can he go from "you're improving" to "well you'll probably be on this for a long time at double the high dose". And then they ask if I'm depressed! My mom who is a nurse said she used to see asshole drs like this all the time, no bedside manner and just goes with the worst possible outcome so that in a couple months they can say oh look how nicely you're doing now. I'm choosing to believe that he will not actually put me on this dose. I'm also wondering if I should seek out a new dermatologist :/

[Brownilocks]

Soo... things look a little better today on day 52. I'm feeling a bit better about my acne, save the new twin cysts that popped up about 2-3 weeks ago on my right jawline that I made worse when I tried to squeeze. Just big, red, itchy, and going nowhere fast... Other stuff getting flatter, but not redder and not going away. I think I'm going to have major problems with lingering hyperpigmentations. Zits that went away a month ago still have very visible and very dark colored red marks... I only have 1 pimple on my forehead!!! Its a flatter cyst by my nose that's been there for a long time but appears to be getting a lot of dry skin on it. Good sign?   Temple pimples (haha, I made a rhyme) are calming somewhat. Skin is still not that dry. Only dry areas are on the biggest and most active spots and the CeraVe cream moisturizer gets rid of it easily every time. Chapped lips a little worse and left corner of my mouth is slightly cracked. Chapstick and vaseline help but don't get rid of it. Nose is really dry and cracking with stuck, hard, cracking mucus (ewww, right?). I put vaseline in it with a Q-tip 2-3 times a day and it feels better for a long time, but it doesn't really ever go away completely. I get a little lower back pain when I exercise a lot but its totally tolerable. My arms and legs feel a little bit dry and itchy but not too bad and they don't look like it so I don't put on much lotion there and its fine. I'm thinking about asking to up my dosage from 60mg to see if I get more results. Would that make things get worse again (another IB)? Would it make the side effects a lot worse? Just wondering if I should ask to next time since not much dry too skin overall...

[Brownilocks]

Day 70

Old spots continue to get better. As for side effects: Lips peeling worse and dry in corners. Lower back hurts right after I run, but tolerable. Very light dry skin on arms and back of hands. Dry, bloody boogers, but not as bad as before. Feel VERY tired some days. Still breaking out but they are smaller and seem to heal quicker. 2 HUGE cysts on my right jawline (not in pics) have been there since day 35 and continue on... The biggest is MASSIVE and recently drained. At its biggest, it took up more than a quarter in space and stuck out like 1/2 an inch (nasty, I know). Its a lot flatter (sticks up from face half as much as before) but still very large and kind of bruised looking now. I hope to be done with the continued breakouts soon. Not sure why I keep getting new ones and many in odd places where I wasn't breaking out before. I feel heartbroken every time I notice a new one... I'm hanging in there and trying to focus on the positive, like my old spots being so much better. I just need to see myself in the mirror again and not be hyper-focused on my skin! I might ask to go up to 70 or 80mg (60 now) if I don't see much improvement or am stilling breaking out when I go back in to the derm in 2 weeks. ANYONE who had/has severe, cystic, and/or nodular acne that has been, or is on accutane, please post! It's great to hear from those who have been through it on days when you get down in the dumps and think it might not work, or might take much, much longer than you expected...

Edited by Brownilocks, 10 February 2013 - 12:25 AM.

[Brownilocks]

Wow, breaking out again. 2 new cysts by left ear, 4 itchy and sore pustules, and 2 more little flesh colored spots (pin sized). I don't get it... It's day 73 by the way... The old spots are still there and haven't changed much in the last 2 weeks. What gives? Is this going to work? Going to the derm in a week, maybe its time to up my dosage to 70mg (still on 60 now at 110lbs.) ?...

[Sasch83]

Wow, breaking out again. 2 new cysts by left ear, 4 itchy and sore pustules, and 2 more little flesh colored spots (pin sized). I don't get it... It's day 73 by the way... The old spots are still there and haven't changed much in the last 2 weeks. What gives? Is this going to work? Going to the derm in a week, maybe its time to up my dosage to 70mg (still on 60 now at 110lbs.) ?...

 

Brownilocks, i am a little further ahead - Day 120 i think and i am still breaking out so don't stress it.  Some people clear up closer to the end of their courses which i hope is the case for me.  If your acne was pretty severe it will take time.  Don't forget to breathe.  If you ever want to vent or have general accutane questions, let me know (this is my 3rd time doing this)

 

Keep on keeping on

[Brownilocks]

Thanks Sasch! I needed some encouragement. I am just getting really frustrated with looking so bad and hiding out in the house. Ready to get my life back... 5 months of looking like this sucks!

[Sasch83]

Thanks Sasch! I needed some encouragement. I am just getting really frustrated with looking so bad and hiding out in the house. Ready to get my life back... 5 months of looking like this sucks!

No problem girl!  We're in this together! 

[Brownilocks]

Day 91, starting to get really dry. Lips looks really weird all the time with little dry things hanging off everywhere. Can't keep nostrils clear of crusty soreness. Pimples still there, albeit smaller. Still cystic acne though. Back of hand rash is getting pretty bad. My general doctor took my blood recently and said cholesterol, HDL/LDL and triglycerides are all off. Wondering why my derm didn't tell me this? Going to call Monday to find out. Lesions looking dryer but getting sick of this! She told me 4-5 months to be completely clear so REALLY desperately hoping that that happens sooner rather than later.. It sucks having all the side effects and still not being clear. Starting week 13 tomorrow. When did others with severe cystic acne start seeing it clear up once and for all? Sorry to keep asking, just not getting many replies lately....

[Brownilocks]

Beginning of month 5 and still not clear. Better than before but still have lots of old spots (bumps) and redness and still getting new ones... Derm said my acne is just very severe, cystic acne and sometimes people with it that bad take longer to clear. She said she has a male patient with similar acne who is on month 7/8 and just now clearing. I believe it will work and it looks pretty good with makeup over it (still bumpy texture though). Otherwise I am very dry, especially inside my nose and of course lips and skin (mainly my forehead and chin where acne is worse). Back gets sore after intensive exercise as well. Hope it gets totally clear soon, dang it!!

Edited by Brownilocks, 05 April 2013 - 12:11 AM.

[ughhhhh]

Hey- sorry its been so rough my doctor told me that everything that's left is a scar, even the bumpy ones! I didn't want to scare you which is why I didn't write back. I'm seeking a second opinion today because his attitude about it was just unacceptable "you should be glad it's not worse, you'll never look like you used to". Who the fuck says that to someone going through something as awful as us?! I am still getting some smaller ones, but my main concern is that my face doesn't seem to heal, even the smallest pimple just sticks around as a little bump so I really am worried I'm just producing scars with every pimple. Makes me so anxious for the future. I'm glad your derm is much nicer and hopeful for you. Where are you located? I wish I had your doctor!