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New Blog: Acne And Self Image--The Reality In The Mirror

body dysmorphic disorder anxiety depression obsession acne skin health beauty recovery healing

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#1 dejaclairevoyant

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Posted 03 December 2012 - 01:08 AM

Hi guys--

Most of the blogs I share are on nutritional topics but since this is also a holistic form, and that includes emotional health, I thought I'd share my latest blog. It's about self image, anxiety and the obsession we can develop with our skin problems.

http://thecircledanc...-in-mirror.html

It was hard for me to write this because this is something I've been struggling with for a long time, sometimes very badly. Recently I've been going through a time of struggling again and it helped me to write this. I hope it helps someone else too.

Much love.

#2 Thehoper

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Posted 03 December 2012 - 02:15 PM

That was a great post. Good for you for being open with others, huge majority of people aren't brave enough to display their bad memories. Amazing how those little experiences of others putting us down stays with us huh? lol. I still remember some bull shit from years ago about some kid I don't even care about putting me down in front of others, and I shrugged it off and didn't care, and yet still remember it clearly to this day. It's like they take a little piece of your pride ya know, some times a big piece, but the lesson in the end is to never let anyone take any piece from ya no matter what they say or do.

Everyone has experiences in their life which shadow their thoughts of worthiness. We all have to remember every day is a new day, the past is the past, your all children of the divine and deserve just as much as every other soul on this world. Don't be afraid of what they'll say.. who cares what cowards think anyway?

And I looked over some of your other posts and ya look damn good to me girl haha, I like that yoga/free spirit look ya got goin on, unique. Great smile in your juice fast post. Good luck to ya.

#3 SweDan

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Posted 04 December 2012 - 01:22 PM

Great post. I can totally relate to most of it. I'm fighting this obsession and it's very difficult to break free from. I'm slowly making progress and this post was very motivating. Recently I've started to tell myself that I can do anything I want. Anything. There's nothing stopping me, except the idea that I can't due to my imperfections.

I'm also with you on stopping the chemicals. Although the thought of stopping scares me, I don't want to live with the harsh side effects for the rest of my life.

#4 dejaclairevoyant

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Posted 04 December 2012 - 03:15 PM

Hey you guys thanks for reading. I'm glad you found it motivating and interesting.

Stopping chemicals has been the scariest thing I've ever done. It's so difficult not to just slather a bunch of BP all over my face right now. But at least I know that as broken out as I am, this is the real, unmedicated current condition of my skin. When it's healed, I'll know it's ME really healed, not my skin being changed by BP.

Had a great EFT therapy session today. I cried a type of cry I haven't experienced in a long time, where you can barely breathe or speak and tears are literally squirting out of your eyes in every direction and soaking your shirt. It scares me that such a level of distress and misery is going on, bubbling down under the surface in me ALL THE TIME. I sometimes have difficulty connecting to my emotions. Instead of crying, I obsess. I stare in mirrors. I think about every bite of food that goes into my body and what it might do.

So it's probably really good that I was able to get such emotion out of me like that. I did the EFT tapping all during the time I was crying. The main point was frustration. I've been battling severe acne for ten years and I am just so fucking beyond frustrated. It's the worst feeling. But after the session I felt empty and calm and it showed me that even though I feel "normal" at times, I'm really walking around like a ticking timebomb with this volcano of hurt under the surface every single day. :( After my session I experienced what it would be like to release that.

EFT is really awesome. :)

#5 tracy521

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Posted 04 December 2012 - 03:24 PM

wow i can totally relate because i am feeling the same exact way right now. i just got into an argument with my mom on the phone because of my acne. she never had acne in her life and she tries to equate things she gone through with it but i told her there is no comparison. i get so caught up in the bad feelings and negativity because you only get one face and with this last round of breakouts i am so afraid i will get even more scarring. i tried to tell my mom that its not just a breakout its so much more than that. as if the breakouts arent enough the red marks and scars just add to the whole thing and make it almost unbearable at times. i know i am in a bad place but just dont know how to fix it. i talk to everybody that will listen and just started working out again so i hope something helps soon because its just all too much to deal with on a regular basis.
i feel so frustrated too. the worst part is not having any control over the situation. i can only do so much but the rest of it is out of my control and that part is truly terrifying and it just seems to be getting worse. i have been lucky to have had clear moments in my life but dealing with this on and off for 16 years has just gotten to me and after having dermatitis for 2 months i have nothing left in me.
thank you for your post i dont feel so alone now.

Edited by tracy521, 04 December 2012 - 03:27 PM.


#6 dejaclairevoyant

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Posted 04 December 2012 - 03:47 PM

You are definitely not alone! *hug* I know other people with clear skin do NOT understand.

#7 tinygiraffe

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Posted 04 December 2012 - 03:55 PM

You've just described my issue with acne entirely I've had severe and now mild to no acne with my current regime.

However I only truly get my full confidence back if my skin remains clear for a week or more. Then when a spot does appear I obsess over it, normally I'd expect 2-3 small pimples or blemishes a week the sort that will go over night and leave little trace alongside an occasional spot. But because of my past experience my thoughts always turn to my face and the issues that surround it.

Sunday brought with it a new spot right in between my eyebrows small at first but once I'd clocked it was there I was back and forth till I'd popped and scarred it Monday morning terrible habit that I'm not proud of and I know it's wrong. Normally this would annoy the hell out of me until I got to work today and saw a colleague with pretty much the same spot scar in the same place, he has no obvious signs of acne and today we have the same complexion yet I feel I stand out or my acne concerns sit in everybody else's minds.

'Acne dysomohic disorder' describes my feelings exactly my wife often tells me there really isn't anything there and I've seen worse on people who I wouldn't describe as having acne. I believe I am mentally effected by my past problems with acne when it was at its most severe.

#8 tracy521

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Posted 04 December 2012 - 03:56 PM

You are definitely not alone! *hug* I know other people with clear skin do NOT understand.


thank you i needed that and yes i so agree. they think their lives are tough but they have no idea. they will never get it! its just a constant battle and one that i am getting sick of trying to win. i always feel so good when i wake up and then when i wash my face and start to get ready i get upset and angry all over again. there is nothing worse than not liking what you see in the mirror. its so upsetting and it just makes it hard to get ready to go to work let alone see your friends and family. i have avoided most of my friends for the lat 6 months because i dont want them to see this version of me. last year through antibiotics i was so clear and had no scarring so this is even tougher for me. i mourn who i once was and that is the hardest part. i just found out i have tons of food allergies which i believe is attributed to taking antibiotics for years so i am taking them for a little while longer then getting off them and am changing my diet entirely so we shall see what happens. i dont want to go on spiro or take accutane so i pray this works.

#9 tinygiraffe

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Posted 04 December 2012 - 03:57 PM

Thank you by the way very brave and well thought out blog post

#10 DaftFrost

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Posted 04 December 2012 - 04:08 PM

Great post dejaclairevoyant!

Tracy521,
I know what you mean, parents can act negatively towards you, as it manifests from wanting you to be someone, how you should be, what you have to be...
I have dealt lot of that myself, but you have to realize that all you can do is just let go.

Let go of what they say. Parents are quite ignorant, by ignorance, I mean they are attached to one sort of belief, that they do not allow themselves to see the other side. Instead they can blame them on you, or build up anger in themselves.
and when they are constantly fed up with the mainstream belief throughout their life, it will be nearly impossible to just simply change their mindset, and if they are not satisfied with their own personal lives, they tend to depend, or rely on you for their own happiness. That is a very wrong way of thinking in the first place.
People lack the responsibility of their own self.

But let me just tell you, don't rebel against them, or try to convince them. There's nothing that comes good out of it.
You may be the one who would be suffering more in the end.

Edited by DaftFrost, 04 December 2012 - 04:10 PM.