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Would You Join A Dating Website For People With Acne Scars/acne?

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I have mixed feelings about dating sites. For one, there are about 30 men to every 1 woman. A woman probably receives 100s of messages a day (mostly from the creepy/stalker type) so the chances that a woman responds back to you is slim to none. This no response could be devastating to a man's ego. You really need to have something going for you in order to get a response out of these woman.

I think you are better off joining a club at the local community college to meet people. The chess club , track-meet , meditation, yoga or even a dance club are all offered at my school where people of all ages and creeds are welcome.Which brings me to my next point... the Acne club! LOL. How weird would that be?


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I read an article about online dating a few days ago and it gave examples of sites that were more specific to certain hobbies, situations, etc..

There were sites aimed at people who had an interest in sci-fi, or sites aimed at people who were looking for others in a particular profession, for instance.

There was one listed which was for people who have HIV. The thinking behind that one was that it removes any kind of awkwardness or stigma there might be about that, and you know right away the people you chat with or the people you meet are experiencing the same thing and therefore understand what it's all about and what it's like to have that.

Obviously, we could never liken something as comparatively trivial as acne directly to HIV, but I suppose the principles with regards to the sites would be the same, in terms of being in touch with people who can relate. I think that might work, for example, for someone who maybe has acne on their back or somewhere else where it isn't instantly visible. I've lost count of the number of threads I've seen in this section where someone has met somebody they're interested in but they're fearful of taking things to the next level because it would mean exposing their body and exposing their acne. Maybe being aware that a person has acne on some part of their body right from the outset would lessen that anxiety for the sufferer.

For all we know, there could be countless people who might like to sign up to dating sites but don't because the pictures they see of others all seem to be people with clear skin. It certainly put me off joining them in the past and I always had a problem when it came to posting pictures of myself. Perhaps, on a more specific site, I might be more inclined to post them without worrying about it. It's not as if people would talk at length in their profile about their acne and nothing else because there's more to everyone than that. I bet it's the same on the site I mentioned for people with HIV; they probably don't talk about that in their profiles or in messages right away, and perhaps it remains unspoken, but there would still be a degree of comfort there knowing that the other person understands and you don't have to conceal whatever your situation may be.

I think the majority would use such a site for the right reasons. After all, it would probably qualify as some kind of fetish if you actively sought to only date people who had some particular issue or condition or whatever. That's the opposite end of the scale whereby, rather than not taking someone on their merits, you'd be picking them out because they had acne. Can't see many people doing that. For me personally, the irony would be that if I were to end up in contact with someone because of their experiences with acne - just as some people have on these boards - if I then got into a relationship with that person and we stayed together, I'd soon get to the point where their skin wouldn't even matter to me anyway.

There's that argument for it not mattering and that if someone judged you on your skin alone, or anything else for that matter, without getting to know, then it wouldn't be worth knowing them. That's true, but I'm not sure that's what we're talking about. If we're talking more about the idea of these sites as a concept and whether there's a place for such a think, then yes, I think there is. I think it would have it's practicalities for those who might not use the "conventional" sites.

All in my humble opinion, of course. smile.png

Omg i luv this post. +1

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Too much overthinking on this topic. Just put it up if you wanna join, then join, if you think it's immoral then fuck off.

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Oi... This subject irks me. There are so many reasons why I think an acne dating site is a terrible idea.

1. It keeps people in the "I have acne" mentality when if anything, an acne sufferer should be attempting to visualize and manifest themselves as a person with healing, clearing skin. Joining a site where you declare acne as a part of your identity will not help with this at all. I realize that this site is somewhat that way, but the difference is that this site is focused on healing acne and people can stick around here even after having clear skin simply because skincare/makeup/diet whatever interests them.

2. It's suggestive of a modern day leper colony... as if we aren't suitable to date anyone who doesn't have this terrible skin disease so we have to be quarantined off. As if we aren't worthy of being loved by "normal" people.

3. Why would I purposefully want to seek out people with acne? That doesn't make sense to me. I'm not saying I think acne is ugly or a dealbreaker, not at all. But to purposefully seek out another person who is suffering from an unpleasant physical condition that causes pain and insecurity? Why would I want to attract another suffering, depressed person? (Acne sufferers are not necessarily depressed, but I would question those who felt the need to join an acne-only dating site) Ever hear the phrase, "misery loves company?" That isn't something I want.

4. Some of you guys may be too young/innocent to realize this, but a site like this will attract some major creepy energies. I've worked in the adult industry and there are people out there who are really turned on by things like ugliness, skin issues, etc. I know that doesn't seem true but it is. There are men who specifically pray on women with low self esteem and a site like this would be a hunting ground, putting emotionally fragile and desperate-to-be-loved people in danger (this is true on any dating site to some degree). There are even sexual fetishes out there specifically devoted to things like "bagging" a girl (basically, screwing an ugly girl by putting a bag over her head) and I would fear that a site like this would attract that exact type of creep.

I guess maybe some people feel differently. But I personally find this idea silly, insulting and outright dangerous. I realize all dating sites present some degree of danger and it's up to everyone to protect themselves, but this just strikes me as particularly dark.

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Current Skin-Care Regimen (A work in progress):

Morning:

Gentle wash with DKR cleanser

Benzoyl Peroxide 2.5% (Following Dan's Regimen)

DKR Lotion + A squirt of Argan or Grapeseed oil (The lotion alone wasn't hydrating enough)

Skin 79 Korean BB Cream (excellent stuff)

Evening:

Gentle Wash with DKR Cleanser

Benzoyl Peroxide 2.5% (Following Dan's Regimen)

DKR Lotion + A squirt of Argan or Grapeseed oil


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2. It's suggestive of a modern day leper colony... as if we aren't suitable to date anyone who doesn't have this terrible skin disease so we have to be quarantined off. As if we aren't worthy of being loved by "normal" people.

Exactly.

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I agree with those of you who think it's a bad idea!

Personally, as a member of such site I would feel like a "last resort" to the guys there. They couldn't get "normal" girls to like them, so they got on this site to find me as their second option. "You're so pretty" they'll say, "but not too pretty, because you've got acne; it means you have lower self-esteem and will go out with me" they'll think to themselves. Thanks, but no thanks.

Let's say that such site really exist - two young people suffering from severe acne finds each other, falls in love, fights the battles together and supports each other with everything they can. Then one of them find a successful treatment and clears up totally . That's all, acne gone, all the depression and suffering melts away. The guy/girl is finally happy and confident, as he/she always wanted. And what happens to the miserable one, who still has severe acne and can't get in under control? The misery will beat him/her down. They will no longer understand each other. Will the clear one finally go out to the world and find an acne-free partner? If he was searched for someone to match their condition before (while still having acne) why wouldn't he now? He doesn't seem to like the challenge to face someone different than him (that we know from the fact that he didn't try to overcome his insecurities and look for a partner without categorizing people according to their skin conditions). Who's gonna be left broken-hearted (and probably permanently emotionally scarred)? The one who still fights the severe acne!

What a great idea for a site...

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Diagnosed with PCOS

Occasional acne + rolling scars

Meds:


- Yasmin birth control
- Spironolactone 37,5mg going 25mg
- Inositol powder 2 times/day before meal

Skincare:

- Hemp oil




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I probably would. My scars are the first and foremost thing on my mind at all times so to be able to not worry about being judged by that would be nice.

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I agree with those of you who think it's a bad idea!

Personally, as a member of such site I would feel like a "last resort" to the guys there. They couldn't get "normal" girls to like them, so they got on this site to find me as their second option. "You're so pretty" they'll say, "but not too pretty, because you've got acne; it means you have lower self-esteem and will go out with me" they'll think to themselves. Thanks, but no thanks.

Let's say that such site really exist - two young people suffering from severe acne finds each other, falls in love, fights the battles together and supports each other with everything they can. Then one of them find a successful treatment and clears up totally . That's all, acne gone, all the depression and suffering melts away. The guy/girl is finally happy and confident, as he/she always wanted. And what happens to the miserable one, who still has severe acne and can't get in under control? The misery will beat him/her down. They will no longer understand each other. Will the clear one finally go out to the world and find an acne-free partner? If he was searched for someone to match their condition before (while still having acne) why wouldn't he now? He doesn't seem to like the challenge to face someone different than him (that we know from the fact that he didn't try to overcome his insecurities and look for a partner without categorizing people according to their skin conditions). Who's gonna be left broken-hearted (and probably permanently emotionally scarred)? The one who still fights the severe acne!

What a great idea for a site...

I disagree lol. This is almost like saying, "we shouldn't have invented the internet or youtube because some people are going to abuse them by tricking people out of money or posting inappropriate/controversial videos." -- This kind of thinking totally negates the amount of "good" that has come from them. Look at how much information has been shared across THIS acne community site.

I think most of us come here for info, solutions, make connections, & it serves as an great emotional dump. You think I'm wrong? -- Go to the 'Forums' home page and look at the Emotional and psychological effects of acne section. It has about 100,000 more posts than any other forum section.

I probably would. My scars are the first and foremost thing on my mind at all times so to be able to not worry about being judged by that would be nice.

^ This. Starting to think people are reading too much into this. It's a common interests & peace of mind thing. Let's say, for example, I live in the country. That being said I'd probably want to date a girl that is also from the country. Why? - because we'd share common interests. Dating a girl from the city probably wouldn't last long as she probably doesn't like mudding or raising chickens/pigs & milking cows. There are always exceptions to any rule but still.

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This just seems like a bad idea.


Morning Routine:
- CLEANSER: Cetaphil Gentle Skin Cleanser/Acne.org Cleanser
- BENZOYL PEROXIDE : 1 pump of The Acne.org 2.5%
- MOISTURIZER: CeraVe Moisturizing Lotion + 5-6 drops of Acne.org Jojoba Oil

Evening Routine:
- CLEANSER: Cetaphil Gentle Skin Cleanser/Acne.org Cleanser
- BENZOYL PEROXIDE : 1 pump of The Acne.org 2.5%
- MOISTURIZER: Cetaphil Moilturizing LotionĀ + Acne.org AHA + 5-6 drops of Acne.org Jojoba Oil

Medication:

  • Ortho Tri Cyclen Lo
  • Meftormin 500mg

Supplements:
  • Vitamin D - 2000 I.U/day
  • Zinc - 50mg/day


And this is all done as gently as possible. smile.png

This is my Regimen journey. ---

Ordering Acne.org Products from the Philippines. ---

This is my two year update on The Regimen and the products I have used ---


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I don't know. In a weird, putting the acne factor out there may allow me to be less uptight and focus on getting to know someone (so douche bags need not apply so....) rather on what they think of my skin. It would be like, 'so, we have acne, who gives a shit, what's for dessert?' All i'm saying is when social pressures are off regarding looks, people may be more open about themselves without all the bells and whistles.

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It's a rocky road but like everything else in life, there is always a beginning and an end. Here's to finding my end.

God is good to me..........more than I deserve.

James 1:2-4

Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.


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No because I don't believe in that. Going to a site like that with the idea in your mind that you hope to meet someone to have a relationship with... It's just not natural. It doesn't work that way, in my opinion. It only results in some forced relationship which is doomed to end badly.

Plus any woman who rejects me because of my imperfect skin is probably a case of *drum roll* good riddance. *cymbal crash*

There are also websites where you can only sign up if you have had higher education or if you are extremely attractive or have a lot of money. It's terrible. I understand a website for people with imperfect skin is something else but it's still excluding people and that's just never good.

This. I was going to make a similar post, but wouldn't have put it as well.

People are people, I don't think acne is a good enough reason to have a whole sub-division of a dating site. If somebody found me to be unattractive simply because I had acne, then I wouldn't want anything to do with them in the first place. I also wouldn't want to limit my criteria to just people with acne...I'm sure there are many people out there that don't careless if I have acne or not.

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I agree with those of you who think it's a bad idea!

Personally, as a member of such site I would feel like a "last resort" to the guys there. They couldn't get "normal" girls to like them, so they got on this site to find me as their second option. "You're so pretty" they'll say, "but not too pretty, because you've got acne; it means you have lower self-esteem and will go out with me" they'll think to themselves. Thanks, but no thanks.

Let's say that such site really exist - two young people suffering from severe acne finds each other, falls in love, fights the battles together and supports each other with everything they can. Then one of them find a successful treatment and clears up totally . That's all, acne gone, all the depression and suffering melts away. The guy/girl is finally happy and confident, as he/she always wanted. And what happens to the miserable one, who still has severe acne and can't get in under control? The misery will beat him/her down. They will no longer understand each other. Will the clear one finally go out to the world and find an acne-free partner? If he was searched for someone to match their condition before (while still having acne) why wouldn't he now? He doesn't seem to like the challenge to face someone different than him (that we know from the fact that he didn't try to overcome his insecurities and look for a partner without categorizing people according to their skin conditions). Who's gonna be left broken-hearted (and probably permanently emotionally scarred)? The one who still fights the severe acne!

What a great idea for a site...

I disagree lol. This is almost like saying, "we shouldn't have invented the internet or youtube because some people are going to abuse them by tricking people out of money or posting inappropriate/controversial videos." -- This kind of thinking totally negates the amount of "good" that has come from them. Look at how much information has been shared across THIS acne community site.

I think most of us come here for info, solutions, make connections, & it serves as an great emotional dump. You think I'm wrong? -- Go to the 'Forums' home page and look at the Emotional and psychological effects of acne section. It has about 100,000 more posts than any other forum section.

Well, and I still think that acne dating site a bad idea, lol :D Didn't say anything about the internet and don't think that is relevant.


Diagnosed with PCOS

Occasional acne + rolling scars

Meds:


- Yasmin birth control
- Spironolactone 37,5mg going 25mg
- Inositol powder 2 times/day before meal

Skincare:

- Hemp oil




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Well, and I still think that acne dating site a bad idea, lol biggrin.png Didn't say anything about the internet and don't think that is relevant.

lol. In any case, I'm glad we are all humble about this discussion and not flaming each other to death. hifive.gif

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^ This. Starting to think people are reading too much into this. It's a common interests & peace of mind thing. Let's say, for example, I live in the country. That being said I'd probably want to date a girl that is also from the country. Why? - because we'd share common interests. Dating a girl from the city probably wouldn't last long as she probably doesn't like mudding or raising chickens/pigs & milking cows. There are always exceptions to any rule but still.

That's just it though. Why would you want to identify acne as an interest? Are you planning on having acne forever? Don't you want to get rid of it? Identifying it as a part of you is keeping it a part of you--or at least helping to do so.

As far as not being judged (responding to the other posts now).... The reason some of you guys are saying you'd want the acne dating site (to not be judged) is the exact reason why I think one shouldn't exist. It is a mistake to be of the mentality that the only way you are safe from judgment is to be with another acne sufferer. I've never dated another person with acne and I've never been judged. And another person with acne isn't necessarily going to be any nicer or any less judgmental than some asshole with clear skin. If anything, they may have more of a focus on acne and pay more attention to your skin whereas a nice, clear skinned person probably wouldn't even notice your breakouts.

2 people like this

Current Skin-Care Regimen (A work in progress):

Morning:

Gentle wash with DKR cleanser

Benzoyl Peroxide 2.5% (Following Dan's Regimen)

DKR Lotion + A squirt of Argan or Grapeseed oil (The lotion alone wasn't hydrating enough)

Skin 79 Korean BB Cream (excellent stuff)

Evening:

Gentle Wash with DKR Cleanser

Benzoyl Peroxide 2.5% (Following Dan's Regimen)

DKR Lotion + A squirt of Argan or Grapeseed oil


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That's just it though. Why would you want to identify acne as an interest? Are you planning on having acne forever? Don't you want to get rid of it? Identifying it as a part of you is keeping it a part of you--or at least helping to do so.

As far as not being judged (responding to the other posts now).... The reason some of you guys are saying you'd want the acne dating site (to not be judged) is the exact reason why I think one shouldn't exist. It is a mistake to be of the mentality that the only way you are safe from judgment is to be with another acne sufferer. I've never dated another person with acne and I've never been judged. And another person with acne isn't necessarily going to be any nicer or any less judgmental than some asshole with clear skin. If anything, they may have more of a focus on acne and pay more attention to your skin whereas a nice, clear skinned person probably wouldn't even notice your breakouts.

Hmm... I see your reasoning. I like this post.

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