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Having Acne And Your Partner Has Nice Skin Ahh!


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#1 DreamerForever

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Posted 02 February 2012 - 01:33 PM

Well I've had acne for about 10 years! I just started using the regimen hopefully it works out for me! But anyways do any of you find it hard having acne and ur bf or gf have nice skin. I went out with my bf for about 3 years and he's seen me without make up probably like I'd say 10 times in the past 3 years but idk some times I'd feel insecure me with all this acne. There would be times I wouldn't hang out with him cuz I had broken out alot! I feel like he obviously knows I have acne but yet it still makes me feel insecure with my skin wishing I had clear skin..

#2 Ssydniee

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Posted 02 February 2012 - 02:26 PM

Girl, I am in the same boat. The worst part is I'm always scared that he'll leave me for a girl with better skin? He isn't shallow, but gah. It's like the bane of my existence.

#3 A damsel in Distress

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Posted 02 February 2012 - 04:26 PM

I know! I'm not currently with anyone but I always worry that when I meet guys they'll just see my acne and not me, so they'll look elsewherePosted Image
But hey, that should just show me they're shallow anyway! So acne kind of helps weed out the surfaces swimmers so to speak...Posted Image
Delightfully, MePosted Image
They judge by the way we look, but what they dont get is...The covers not quite like the book

#4 mrjarjarbinks77

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Posted 02 February 2012 - 09:43 PM

Well I've had acne for about 10 years! I just started using the regimen hopefully it works out for me! But anyways do any of you find it hard having acne and ur bf or gf have nice skin. I went out with my bf for about 3 years and he's seen me without make up probably like I'd say 10 times in the past 3 years but idk some times I'd feel insecure me with all this acne. There would be times I wouldn't hang out with him cuz I had broken out alot! I feel like he obviously knows I have acne but yet it still makes me feel insecure with my skin wishing I had clear skin..


I your in a relationship, you need to be happy. The insecurities and depression is what wll push someone away. If someone leaves cause of that, do you really want them? As sad as this maybe, this is as good as it gets guys. We will get older, our skin will age, look worse, may even scar, and one day we will die. This is life. Now, we could be depressed about it or happy about the life we choose to live.

#5 the uphill battle

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Posted 02 February 2012 - 10:44 PM

I can totally relate, my fiance has beautiful skin! I stare at it and examine it with envy. It must be nice to have pretty skin at all angles and in any sort of lighting. I'll never know, though.

Edited by the uphill battle, 02 February 2012 - 10:45 PM.

"I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I'm out of control, and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." -Marilyn Monroe

#6 quechua

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Posted 03 February 2012 - 01:16 AM

i think thats awesome youre with someone that has nice skin because it probably means that even though you have bad skin youre still pretty. I havent had a bf for a while beause i always think whats gonna happen when we stay the night at each others house and I have to wash my face and lather on my mouturizer and look like a zombie. , or when I go to sleep with clear skin and wake up to horrible pimples. but then i think well there are girls with beautiful skin out there (ive seeb many) but that facial feautures wise arent very cute, and then theres me (, not trying to sound full of myself but I am content with the way I look) with all this acne and dry peeling skin and still get approached . one day hopefully theyll cure acne, end of 2012?

#7 AbyBar

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Posted 03 February 2012 - 10:42 PM

My same exact story.
My significant other has flawless skin. No zits, no nothing.
But he's seen me without make up, I don't like to wear make up for some odd reason. I also don't know how to apply it either without it looking like a total mess .
If you guys have been together for three years and he's still with you then I'm sure he sees past our acne and doesn't even care about it. Would you stop liking him if he developed a sudden breakout ?? I hope not. Just hold on to him tight and don't let your insecurities come in between .

#8 junkyard

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Posted 03 February 2012 - 11:24 PM

I have been with my partner for 3.5 years, and at first I was embarrassed for him to see me without makeup. About a year ago, I decided it was time to give up trying to hide it - it's not like the makeup is actually hiding anything, it was just some kind of a security blanket for me.

I think the stress that has been lifted now that I don't feel like I have to hide myself from the person I love has made my life a lot better. There are still times that I would feel embarrassed, but usually I would just make a joke about it, like "sorry you have to stare at this huge zit on my face," and he would just tell me he doesn't care. Since I definitely care, it's hard for me to believe, but he still wants to be with me, so I guess he must mean it.

It was hard at first. I imagine it's like if you're a person who wears a wig, and then one day you just decide to stop wearing it. Ha ha.

Just remember, you are your own worst critic.

#9 mrjarjarbinks77

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Posted 05 February 2012 - 10:30 PM

The part about having a relationship is not something to overlook. You guys are doing something right and likely, you are very critical of yourself in a way your partner has looked past that.

#10 PaulH85

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Posted 06 February 2012 - 10:37 AM

Surely, for everyone who says they can relate to this subject, the telling factor should be that your partner is with you? Surely you know that they love you for who you are? Doesn't that help cancel out these insecurities?

It seems like such a shame that people might be so caught up in their acne that they could feel this way or perhaps even fear their partner would leave them for it. Come on, folks, have a bit more belief in yourselves, in your partners, and in your relationships than that!

It's wonderful that you've managed to put yourselves out there and not let your acne stop you from finding someone. Well, at least I think it is - I struggle to feel even vaguely capable of meeting anyone at all, even when my skin's clear - so give yourselves credit, let that be enough, and be happy! Posted Image

Thoughts become words
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It is time to change my destiny

 

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#11 jujuy

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Posted 07 February 2012 - 02:43 PM

Ugh my BF has the nicest skin! It's soo pretty, actually he's so good looking :)

When we first started dating, I would do crazy things like hiding in the bathroom to retouch my makeup before bed. All sorts of crazy manouevres so he would never see me without makeup. About a month and a half in he saw me without makeup...and guess what he said? Nothing, nothing at all. He kept complimenting me and telling me I was beautiful. Crazy, huh?

It took two months more for me to be able to talk about my skin with him, but now it's OK and he's so supportive of the treatment I am undergoing! <3

#12 MariaBo

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Posted 07 February 2012 - 06:08 PM

My boyfriend also has the nicest skin in the world! We have only been together about 6 months, almost half of which were long distance, but now that we see each other every day, there is no hiding my acne. When we met over the summer my skin was doing well but it as really gotten a lot worse. He still hasn't seen me without makeup on and there have been many times when I tried to muster up the courage to talk about my skin and treatments and the way it makes me feel but I always freeze up and feel really scared to talk about it. I don't know why it seems to scary because makeup can only hide so much and he sees me in the morning. Maybe it is so scary because I don't want him to know my biggest insecurity and know how upset it makes me and then think i'm not very strong?

#13 PaulH85

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Posted 07 February 2012 - 06:34 PM

Maybe it is so scary because I don't want him to know my biggest insecurity and know how upset it makes me and then think i'm not very strong?


Being insecure about your acne doesn't mean you're not strong. By the same token, I can't imagine any decent, caring person would see acne as some kind weakness. It's a safe bet that your boyfriend is a decent and caring person otherwise you probably wouldn't want to be with him. In which case, he'd probably only ever want to support you through it and be there to offer strength whenever you happen to not be feeling particularly strong yourself.

If I had a partner and was able to share my biggest insecurities, or them theirs, I'd imagine it would only serve to bring us closer together. Especially if it's something that isn't really shared with anyone else and I'd essentially be saying, 'I trust you enough to open up about this', That's how I'd like it to be anyway, although perhaps it isn't so easy for every person or within every relationship in reality.

:)

Thoughts become words
Words become actions
Actions become habits
Habits become character
Character becomes destiny
It is time to change my destiny

 

You look like a guy I banged once.


#14 MariaBo

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 11:32 AM


Maybe it is so scary because I don't want him to know my biggest insecurity and know how upset it makes me and then think i'm not very strong?


Being insecure about your acne doesn't mean you're not strong. By the same token, I can't imagine any decent, caring person would see acne as some kind weakness. It's a safe bet that your boyfriend is a decent and caring person otherwise you probably wouldn't want to be with him. In which case, he'd probably only ever want to support you through it and be there to offer strength whenever you happen to not be feeling particularly strong yourself.

If I had a partner and was able to share my biggest insecurities, or them theirs, I'd imagine it would only serve to bring us closer together. Especially if it's something that isn't really shared with anyone else and I'd essentially be saying, 'I trust you enough to open up about this', That's how I'd like it to be anyway, although perhaps it isn't so easy for every person or within every relationship in reality.

Posted Image


Thanks Paul for your kindness and wise words. I really think you are right, that if I could just get some more courage and talk about it that he would support me and it would bring us closer together. He's a good guy and he must like me for reasons other than my skin! hah. It's just difficult for me to talk about it I think because of how much stress it gives me, how often I think about it, and how intensely it has affected me emotionally. It took me forever to even talk about that aspect of it to my family! I know how other people here feel too about being insecure that he/she could leave for someone with clear skin, or if their exes had clear skin, and that jealous scared feeling. It's totally irrational I think but hard not to feel like that sometimes. It sucks that acne can make me feel like less worthy that someone who doesn't have it.

#15 jujuy

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 12:23 PM

I feel you MariaBo! It's so hard for me to talk about it too; usually, when I do it (only with my family, some of my closest friends, and my bf), I break down into tears. The right moment to talk about it will come naturally. I know for me, it was when I started Accutane. Before that, I would just always try to have him see me with makeup on and say nothing. Then when I started Accutane, I didn't want to sneak around for my trips to the dermatologist or get blood work done; that's when I finally talked about it.

In the end, when someone loves you, they'll support through the tough times.

#16 jkitty03

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Posted 11 February 2012 - 11:48 AM

I'm on the same boat. My boyfriend has the nicest skin plus he's fair and pinkish. Well we're together for almost 3years. Yes, there were many times I felt those WHAT IFS.. I won't lie that I still have that WHAT IFS. The funny thing is, on unexpected moments (where I am just being plain me= bad hair days, sans concealer), my boyfriend will stare on my face and tell me "you're so beautiful" out of nowhere. I will shrugged it off or laughed at it sometimes. There was a time when we had heart-to-heart talk (when we would talk about his life) he said "I can't imagine myself with someone else other than you". Hearing him say that was really heart warming. LOL. I believe him. Though future is uncertain.

So much for that cheesy moment. My boyfriend learned from me many things because of sharing my experiences about my acne. He will also help me find products that I could use to stop having breakouts. And I also tell him about my visits to my dermatologist. And he's just ok with it. He's ok with my face :)

As what others told, it all comes down to who's at your side.
So keep the relationship and love alive ;)

Happiness is the consequence of personal effort.


You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it,


and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it.



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