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About blackbird86

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  1. blackbird86 added a blog entry in Accutane-Round 3   

    Day 13-Ib? Looking For Feedback!
    I think the IB has hit me. I have clumps of clogged pores on both sides of my mouth, and they are starting to emerge. I've got a couple on my forehead as well, but those don't really bother me. It's the ones around the mouth that SUCK--I feel like you can't help but notice them. Even when they eventually go down, I will be left with a lot of hyperpigmentation. Ugh! I didn't get an IB during my first two courses, so I don't know what to expect. Can anyone tell me how long theirs lasted? Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.
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  2. blackbird86 added a blog entry in Accutane-Round 3   

    Day 6
    I took my 6th pill tonight. It's starting to kick in! Here's how I know:
    -My lips are starting to feel dry
    -My skin is thinner (sadly, I know this because I picked...shame on me!)
    -Overall, my skin is oilier than usual. This might sound weird, but it happened during both of my previous courses; my skin got oily in the very beginning and then became drier (or in my case, it just normalized)

    Whoop! Good luck to all of my other Accutaners out there.
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  3. blackbird86 added a blog entry in Accutane-Round 3   

    Start Of Day 3.
    Is it physically possible for an IB to start this quickly?

    As I've mentioned before, my biggest area of concern right now are the clogged pores around my mouth. I don't even have any actives right now; rather, the area around my mouth has bumpiness from both healing pimples and clogged pores. Well...I've been terrified of getting an IB considering the congestion I'm dealing with, and I think it just might be happening. The weird thing is...the pores aren't becoming inflamed, but some seem to be swelling while others seem to be coming up in the form of plugs (but I refuse to touch this--I know I'll only make it worse). It looks so horrible in natural lighting/certain bathroom lighting (you know what I'm talking about). I am seriously considering getting a facial with extractions to improve the texture of my skin. Of course, I would tell my esthetician that I'm on Accutane; I trust that she'll tell me whether or not she would actually do a facial while I'm on such an intense medication.

    UGH. This SUCKS. Royally. PLEEEEAAASE if anyone has words of advice/comfort, I'd love to hear them.

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  4. blackbird86 added a comment on a blog entry Mandelic Acid Serum   

    Wow! Your results look amazing! Congrats!
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  5. blackbird86 added a comment on a blog entry Accutane So Far   

    Good luck with your course! Quick question for you...has the Accutane helped to get rid of your clogged pores, too? Or have you not noticed a difference with this? I just started my 3rd course and that's my main concern right now...
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  6. blackbird86 added a blog entry in Accutane-Round 3   

    1St Pill!
    I took my first pill last night. My skin is actually OK right now. My biggest insecurity are the clogged pores around my mouth. It's so weird...every other part of my face is pristine save for some areas of congestion around my temples, but those really don't bother me. It's the ones around my mouth that make me self-conscious. In certain lighting, it looks AWFUL--so congested. Just gross. They just sit there! The last 2 times that I did Accutane, I didn't have as much congestion as I do now, but it did work quickly and made my skin both smooth and breakout free. I'm a little nervous about this round and what will happen to those clogged pores. If anyone has any light to shed on this issue, I'd love to hear it!
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  7. blackbird86 added a comment on a blog entry Accutane Day 15   

    I'm here to encourage you! I've been on Accutane twice, and I'm about to start a 3rd course. It cleared me quickly and left me clear for almost 2 years afterward each time. I RARELY wore make-up because my skin was so clear! I really think the main reason my acne came back both times was because I started picking at my skin at the littlest sign of a breakout. Even though I am breaking out again, it's not as bad as it was before I first went on Accutane. Good luck! Message me if you have any questions!
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  8. blackbird86 added a comment on a blog entry Depressed.   

    Thank you. You're right. I am approaching today with a positive state of mind! I have a lot to be thankful for.
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  9. blackbird86 added a comment on a blog entry Depressed....   

    I absolutely 100% know how you feel. I have also been dealing with acne since I was a teenager. I'm now 27, recently engaged, and wanting to start a family in the next few years, and I am terrified at the thought of having a child for fear of my skin going crazy.

    I'm actually about to start my 3rd round of Accutane. It worked perfectly for me the first 2 times. Honestly, I think a big reason that my acne came back both times is because I did start to breakout a tiny bit and started picking at my skin. Of course, that only exacerbated my situation. I highly, highly recommend that you try it. Maybe not now since you're wanting to have another child, but when you're sure that you don't want to get pregnant, I would do it. It is amazing what it does for your skin and self-confidence.

    No offense Abhishek17, but telling her not to be depressed and that stressing only makes it worse is not helpful nor is it fair. I understand when you (and people like you) say things like that you're just trying to help, but if we could control our emotions about acne, we would. Some people aren't bothered by it, and some people are. We feel how we feel. We can't help it.

    Good luck, Nina. Feel free to message me if you have any questions about Accutane!
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  10. blackbird86 added a blog entry in Accutane-Round 3   

    Acne is such a strange thing. I was feeling quite alright this morning, and now, less than 12 hours later, I feel so down about my skin. This past week, I have had one of my worst breakouts in a while. A week ago today, my skin was pretty good. Not perfect by any means, but not something I was obsessing over like I am right now. While I had some clogged pores and redness from previous breakouts, I was able to conceal it well with make-up. This week, I was hit with the type of breakout that cannot be covered no matter how much make-up I apply. It is amazing, and quite sad, how much this condition radically affects every freaking aspect of my damn life. When I am clear, I am myself. I love life because I don't have to think about my skin. And my acne is not even that bad. It's just persistent and located in an area that is so damn hard to conceal (around the mouth). I look at pictures of people whose conditions appear so much worse than mine, and my heart goes out to them because I know that it's hard enough dealing with my own situation that it must be so difficult for them.

    I have never been a lover of make-up. I prefer the natural look. I really only wear it out of necessity. When I was clear from Accutane, I only wore make-up when I went out for special occasions. It was SO NICE to be able to leave the house without a stitch of concealer or foundation on. Now, I can't leave the house without either, and my face still looks like shit. It is so frustrating. My poor boyfriend has to deal with my obsessiveness and depression. He tells me all of the time how much he loves me and how beautiful I am, but all I can think is, "How could anyone find me attractive right now?" You would think that someone telling you something like that would make it better, but for me, it only makes it worse. It's a double-edged sword; it feels awful to have acne, and it feels even more awful to refute someone's love because of the sense of worthlessness that acne imposes on you.

    Ugh. This sucks.
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  11. blackbird86 added a comment on a gallery image January 23, 2014   

    Photos today! I do have makeup on and these photos aren't great quality, they are taken with my phone. My skin has improved 80-90% in one month of Accutane. I'm so ecstatic I can hardly stand it!!
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  12. blackbird86 added a blog entry in Accutane-Round 3   

    5 Days!
    I'm finding that writing about this in a public yet anonymous forum is quite therapeutic. It helps to know that I am not the only adult who is still dealing with and depressed by acne. It seems that everyone in my life (friends, family, boyfriend) has good skin, and therefore, nobody really understands the emotional pain that this disease causes. I get to start Accutane in 5 days, and I could not be more excited to get back on track toward having clear skin and, more importantly, to re-gaining my self-confidence.
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  13. blackbird86 added a blog entry in Accutane-Round 3   

    1 More Week!
    I cannot wait to get back on this medication. Currently, my skin is the worst it's been in the past year or so. I have 4 actives around my mouth...all swollen, painful pustules. I also have some clogged pores around my mouth. Every other part of my face is clear...but the breakouts around my mouth have always been my biggest problem, and they've always made me feel very, very insecure. I feel like they are the most noticeable and they're nearly impossible to conceal. Even if I can cover the redness with make-up, the swollen, bumpy texture cannot be covered. Ugh. This sucks!
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  14. blackbird86 added a comment on a blog entry 11 More Days...   

    I understand. Honestly, I've done it twice and come out fine. It's worth it to me to not deal with the stress of my skin. I do know about some supplements that cleanse the liver. Thanks for your concern!
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  15. blackbird86 added a comment on a blog entry 11 More Days...   

    Thanks for the comment! I have actually recently tried the non-dairy diet, although I cheat just a little bit. I've never been a milk drinker, anyway, but I do love yogurt and cheese, so I've given both of those up with the exception of having *a little* cheese every once in a while. It's been about a month, and it hasn't seemed to make a difference...
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