Just Call Me OCD

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About Just Call Me OCD

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  1. Oil-Filled Bumps? Not Milia...

    I was experiencing some sudden Retin-A irritation and a rash, so I took a few days off.  This isn't uncommon for me when the weather gets colder, but the rash was really severe, so I had to cut back from Retin-A nearly every night, to Retin-A about once or twice per week.  I haven't used Retin-A in 3 nights, and over the course of the past 2 days, these tiny, clear, oil-filled bumps have formed along my smile line on one side of my face.  This is where I'm prone to breakouts, and this is where I used to use quite a bit of Retin-A.  Even over the past 24 hours, about 5 or 6 new ones have popped up.  I sweat a lot due to thyroid problems, so I'm wondering if the sweat is trapped in the pores.  I've had milia before, and these are not milia.  They're completely clear with no whitish head, and they're the size of the head of a pin.  It's really upsetting that they would come on so suddenly, and I'm terrified to prick them because I'm a really slow healer who scars horribly.  I'm out of town, and there are no good dermatologists here. I guess I'll be using Retin-A again tonight.  Praying that stops them in their tracks, shrinks them, and prevents new ones from forming.  This is really upsetting.  Any advice is welcome.  Hyper-sensitive skin, so pretty much all products cause hyperpigmentation, irritation, or a rash.
  2. Amen! All of the season changes mess with my skin! I get comfortable in a season and then a breakout hits when the weather changes! Again, thank you. No doubt I'll be on here again in crisis within the next few months. So wonderful to have support from people like you!
  3. Hey! Aw, you're so sweet to check in. The scab is almost gone. Just a big red splotch is left. Not surprising. My skin is so fair that I probably won't ever get rid of the redness, but at least it's pretty flat. Just a few scab flakes left. I decreased to 100 milligrams Minocycline a couple of days ago, and I'm hoping that keeps me relatively clear for a few more weeks, then I'll go back off antibiotics entirely until I have another flare-up. I just wish I could get rid of my red marks. I'm still breaking out, but it's not too bad. It's definitely because places are turning on the heat now, so they're always way too hot, and I sweat too much. Thanks for checking in! We're at the tail end of the issue! Just that hideous red mark now!
  4. I knew it. Washing my face was devastating. The skin is peeling in the area an inch around the scab. I am also peeling severely all over my chin, but I'm still breaking out. I feel hormonal zits forming around my chin and mouth, and I'm having breakthrough bleeding. I also have a couple zits on my cheeks, and there's something happening on my forehead. I don't remember the last time I went two nights without Retin-A, but it's going to have to happen. My existing cysts are redder and seem to be expanding again. When it rains, it pours. I hate this so, so much. I've slathered my whole face in Biafine. Hope it doesn't break me out.
  5. You truly understand what I'm going through. My OCD and anxiety are at an all-time high. I got spoiled by clear skin for a few months and only had to cover up a couple of fading pink marks every day. Then I got 2 cysts and flipped out. Then I got this milium or whatever it was, and I went overboard and opted for the extraction. It was way easier to cover up a smooth bump than a bright red, scabby patch. My mistake. Now I need to stop beating myself up for it. I am trying to remain hopeful, but this reminds me too much of last year when I went through a similar situation and became a hermit for about a month due to a poorly-healing scab. The difference there was that I picked a cyst to death, then went in for a cortisone shot, then couldn't stop washing it and removing more skin. I need to remind myself that I'm not even 72 hours out from this procedure, and the dermatologist did it for me this time. I'm on antibiotics to increase the healing. There's nothing more to be picked. Now I just have to wait for the scab to heal. I don't have any major events to attend. And I have to keep living in the meantime. I have to force myself to dab a little powder on and get outside and do things. I have to force myself to wear extra eye makeup to detract attention from my scab and my healing cysts. I have to force myself to decrease my heart rate and adrenaline when I feel like I can't breathe after looking in the mirror. I have to believe that I won't keep breaking out instead of believing that I will. I have to believe in the healing process. I'll get through it. I always have. I just want this to stop so that I can enjoy my life. I've had too many pimple and/or scab crises that halt my life. I have to stop that. I have to keep living. Thank you, my dear. So much. I'm going to go wash my face now. I might panic a little bit, but I'm going to try to get a good night's sleep and calm down.
  6. I'm also scared now. I went to wash my face, and the raised, wrinkled skin around the area lifted off, so I used tweezers to gently remove it. I might have removed a tiny portion of the scab in the process. The surrounding area is bright red, which doesn't surprise me. I was a bit relieved that the wrinkly skin came off, but now I hate the redness, and I'm terrified that I've tampered with the scab healing process. I don't want an indented mark... I've applied Biafine all around the area for now and am forcing myself to not look at it. It stung a little bit when I applied the Biafine, so I bet I did remove a small portion of the scab... Think it'll scab back over and heal level?
  7. Thank you for responding, ShadyLee! Seriously. I am so thankful that someone finally responded. The major swelling from the procedure has gone down, but it's like the scab has increased in size. She only lanced a tiny bump, but she pushed and prodded all around that area, so I think the surrounding skin is very angry. I have the little indented scab in the center, which is yellowish-brown, surrounded by wrinkled, puckered volcanic walls of red skin. It's impossible to cover with makeup. I've called the derm three times over the past three days - a couple of hours after the procedure, yesterday morning, and this morning. I talked to her assistant today, who seemed clueless. She said the healing process sounded normal. I told her that I don't understand how this is going to heal flat. I know I'll be left with a large red mark, and I know that'll last for years. That's just what my skin does, unfortunately. However, I don't want a raised, crusty area. Or a keloid. Or an indentation. It's such a sensitive patch of skin, and if it even heals flat, makeup will get clogged in the smile line when I smile. I don't know if the scab will ever come off, or if the surrounding skin will heal level with the rest of the skin, or if the scab will heal level with the rest of the skin. It's a crater with raised, wrinkly walls. The derm told me it would take a week for this to heal. We are at 48 hours, and it looks worse than ever. I feel utterly hopeless. Since there's no tenderness or an any bump leftover (believe me, she got rid of everything that was ever there or would ever be there, ugh), a cortisone shot would likely cause atrophy. I'm going to go back in early next week if I don't see a marked improvement. At this stage of the game, I can't bear to spend more money just to have her tell me that it'll heal and that I just need to be patient. I'm still popping 200 milligrams Minocycline. Otherwise, she told me to use Vaseline/Aquaphor on the spot, but I almost feel like that prevents it from healing. I've used some Cetaphil Restoraderm moisturizer. That's the most I feel like doing right now, especially since I feel the compulsive need to wash it off and check it all the time. I wish I hadn't tried to powder the area yesterday. I'm afraid that set me back in terms of healing, but maybe not. How long did your spot take to heal, and how long did the red mark last? I know your circumstances were different, but I'm curious. Again, THANK YOU!
  8. Nobody can offer any support or advice? Today, the skin all around the area is red and wrinkled. The center is still a greenish crater. The diameter of the wound seems to have increased. I can't cover it. I'm so depressed about the fact that I'll probably be out of commission for 2 weeks, but really more like a month. Please?
  9. Closed comedone extraction

    I don't know if anyone still follows this topic, but it's worth a shot. I got a slightly inflamed milium extracted today in my smile line, and I'm left with a bright red, dime-sized, raised area that has a green-brown indented scab in the center. I'm really worried about the healing process. I use Retin-A 0.025%, and the dermatologist knew this before she did the procedure. She lanced and squeezed and kept digging, unfortunately. I also have ridiculously fair and sensitive skin, so the redness is major. I scar terribly. The derm said the spot should be gone within a week, I should use Vaseline on it, I could cover it with gentle makeup, etc. But I don't buy any of that since it's 12 hours since the extraction and it looks like I took a pair of pliers to my face. She doesn't understand how sensitive my skin is. I already have enough red marks to cover, and now I have a disgusting scab that probably won't heal. I have it covered with Bactroban and hydrocortisone, and I'm taking 200 milligrams Minocycline. Please help. Instill hope. Tell me this is normal and will fade and fall off within a day or two. I feel hopeless.
  10. Please, someone. Please. This is going to take about a month to heal, and I will be left with a horrible red mark. I already have really bad red marks elsewhere. I do not know how to cope with this or to heal it. I should never have gotten this procedure done.
  11. Can anyone help me? I know I can't use Retin-A tonight, or it'll make this area worse. Should I use Biafine? Hydrocortisone? Polysporin? The dermatologist recommended Vaseline, but that clogs my pores. I need the swelling and redness gone, and I need the scab to go away. I need it to heal flat. I don't wear full makeup ever. How do I prevent other breakouts in the meantime? I'm sure my stress/crying will create more. How long should I stay on Minocycline (200 milligrams)? All the derm said is that I should stay on it until I'm "stabilized," and then I should titrate off. That will be a while since I have this swollen mass in my smile line, plus two (hopefully healing) cysts around my chin and mouth.
  12. About 2 hours ago, I went to the dermatologist. She told me my cysts were on their way out (after a month), but she could inject one if I wanted. However, there was a good chance of atrophy. I declined. I hope I don't regret that. One is really red on my chin (which she said was flat) and the other is really red below the corner of my mouth (which is still raised and has a visible yellow center if I press my tongue against it). But she said continued antibiotics would do the trick within the week. I hope she's right. That active one has already come back once... Now for the real problem. I'm flipping out. I had a small, inflamed milium in my smile line. I knew that I would take matters into my own hands if I didn't let her extract it for me. So I let her extract it. She pushed and prodded and dug into the skin for several minutes straight. She then announced that she got "most" of the oil plug out, put on a Band-Aid, and sent me on my way. I am very swollen on that spot. I am very scabbed on that spot, but it's not a raised scab. It's a skin damage scab that will scar and cause permanent hyperpigmentation. I am very red about 3 or 4 inches surrounding the area, as if she used something on my skin that caused an allergic reaction. It also itches. I told her how sensitive my skin is, but she kept digging at it. I called the office but could only reach a medical assistant, who suggested hydrocortisone and Vaseline. I have smothered that patch with Biafine, and I have hydrocortisone on the actual spot. Please, please, please help. I am in panic mode and don't foresee healing or good skin ever again. My skin is THAT sensitive and fair. I won't be able to leave home for a week or more. I already have scars and red marks to cover, and now I have a nightmare otherwise. Suggestions? Support? Anything?
  13. Blind Pimples - 3 Weeks!

    I have had 2 blind pimples for 3 weeks now. I started taking Minocycline (100 to 200 milligrams) again once they appeared, and I thought they were getting better. However, the one on my chin has gotten redder. The one in the corner of my mouth was really on its way out, and then all of a sudden, it refilled and got huge, painful, and red again. I went to the dermatologist 1.5 weeks ago, and she said the zits were healing, so she didn't want to give me a cortisone shot and risk atrophy. Now, I've requested another appointment for next week. It's mid-week, and I'm seeing a dermatologist instead of a PA this time. I'm just going to risk atrophy with the cortisone shots. This is ridiculous. I'm already going to have horrible scars/hyperpigmentation from these two zits. Meanwhile, I got a new zit on my forehead, which I assume is due to stress, and I found a new one on my chin yesterday. It doesn't end. I've cried and panicked over these for too long now. I went several months with no major issues, and now everything is showing up at once. I never wear full foundation, so I just spot-cover blemishes with concealer. They end up looking really obvious. I have too many events coming up to not wear makeup, and if I don't wear makeup even on days when I can stay in, I go crazy from looking in the mirror 24/7. I feel absolutely hopeless. How do I stop the breakouts? I'm already on Retin-A, Minocycline (which I'll never be able to stop now), Spironolactone, and Yaz. What else can I do? My skin is too sensitive for zit-zapping products like BP and SA. I've tried. I'm 26. I'm too old to still be getting these breakouts. It seems like everyone around me has perfect skin and no worries. And I feel so self-conscious about these giant zits, especially knowing that I'm powerless to stop them. They linger for weeks, and the scars linger for months and years. Next week marks a month since these zits first appeared, and there are others in the works. It's infuriating. It's depressing. It's horrible.
  14. Best Blind (Hormonal) Pimple Advice - Sensitive Skin

    I'm back on 200 milligrams Minocycline. The one beside my mouth was so close to leaving. Then it refilled. It's bright red and bulbous again. It hurts. I think the one on my chin is leaving slowly. I'm now developing another cyst on the other side of my chin. I don't know what to do. I've asked for an emergency derm appointment early next week since I'm out of town this weekend. I'm in a wedding, so that sucks. I'm not used to a surge in hormonal acne like this. Three weeks since everything started, and I'm screwed even more than I originally was. I need support.
  15. Best Blind (Hormonal) Pimple Advice - Sensitive Skin

    I kid you not. These jerks are still lurking. It has been THREE weeks. When I saw the dermatologist last week, she said they looked like they were on their way out, and she didn't want to give me cortisone shots and risk atrophy. I agreed at the time, but a week later, they're still here. The one on my chin is slowly going down, but it's still as red as ever. The one beside my mouth seemed to really be diminishing in size until a few days ago, when it developed a white head under the skin. It's still lurking there, and it's gotten redder again, too. The clogged oil gland or pore or whatever it is near my mouth/cheek area is still there. It's white and under the skin, with a slight red border. The dermatologist said it wasn't exactly milia, nor did it look like a pimple under the skin. She said she could lance it, but it would irritate the skin, so it would probably be better off left alone. True story, it would've made it worse because I heal so poorly and scar so badly. She told me to keep going with the Retin-A. So I am. And I'm still taking 100 milligrams Minocycline. I don't know if/when I can stop now...
  16. Best Blind (Hormonal) Pimple Advice - Sensitive Skin

    I see the dermatologist tomorrow, and I'm dreading going in there without makeup. I look grotesque. I reduced the Minocycline to 150 milligrams three days ago and have used 100 milligrams yesterday and today. I only reduced it because I hate to be dependent on antibiotics, even though nothing is improving. The zit beside my mouth has reappeared with redness and a small under-the-skin white head. The one below my lip has maybe shrunk a tiny bit, but it's still bright red with a deep under-the-skin yellow head that I can see if I press my tongue against it. The one on my chin is the worst of all. It's bright red and huge with a deep under-the-skin yellow head that is visible if I stretch my chin out. To top it all off, I'm peeling terribly in these areas, even thought I've avoided using harsh products for the most part. I am now getting a new zit near the chin zit. It's starting out the same way the others have, as a tiny under-the-skin whitehead. I'm terrified to mess with it, and I'm terrified to not mess with it. I need an answer and a fast solution. The most depressing thing of all? Even after these pimples are no longer active, which could take a good month or so, the red marks will never leave. I feel completely hopeless. I have a wedding coming up in a week and a half, and I don't even want to go anymore.
  17. Best Blind (Hormonal) Pimple Advice - Sensitive Skin

    I'm at a loss here. They're bigger and more painful today. It feels like the one on my chin is spreading to the other side of my chin. I've been on 200 milligrams of Minocycline for a few days now, and nothing is improving. I feel horrible about myself.
  18. Best Blind (Hormonal) Pimple Advice - Sensitive Skin

    I feel like they aren't getting better. The soonest I could schedule a dermatology appointment is in a week.
  19. Best Blind (Hormonal) Pimple Advice - Sensitive Skin

    Ugh! They're bigger and redder today.
  20. Best Blind (Hormonal) Pimple Advice - Sensitive Skin

    Thanks, Father Smulnik. You made me smile. (That takes a lot these days!)
  21. Best Blind (Hormonal) Pimple Advice - Sensitive Skin

    I feel very, very low. I'm out of town, so cortisone shots aren't an option. Even if/when these lumps go away, the redness will linger for a year or so. That's what my skin does. I hate my face today. So much.
  22. Best Blind (Hormonal) Pimple Advice - Sensitive Skin

    I'm not picking, but I don't know how these are going to leave on their own. My mouth and chin are throbbing. I hate antibiotics, but I guess I'll keep taking them for the next few days...
  23. Best Blind (Hormonal) Pimple Advice - Sensitive Skin

    When it rains, it pours. In addition to the nose one, smile line one, and chin one (all blind, of course)... Stuff happening between my brows now. Another blind one beside my mouth. Stuff happening along my chin/jaw. Redness and blotchiness. Broken blood vessels. Great fun, all of it.
  24. Best Blind (Hormonal) Pimple Advice - Sensitive Skin

    Thanks for your replies. I ended up picking at the one on my nose because it's in the least obvious spot. (Great reason, right?) I got some white pus out, but now it's a million times larger and redder, of course. I've left the other two alone. I took a shower and slathered hydrocortisone all over my face, with extra globs on the zits. My skin sucks right now. I guess I'll keep being a hermit this weekend so I can keep covering my pimples with hydrocortisone. I'm on Yaz, as I said, but I've been spotting this week. That's unusual for me. Probably all of it is stress-related. It's just odd for me to get more than one blind pimple at a time, and I've been lucky for so long now. It was a shock to break out again. I hate it so much. Makes me feel horrible. Makes me feel like I'll keep breaking out while these other zits continue to get bigger.
  25. Best Blind (Hormonal) Pimple Advice - Sensitive Skin

    Please? I really need some support. When I woke up this morning and gently washed my face, I felt so sad. That whole section of my skin around my mouth is discolored and bulbous. If I try to cover it, it looks white and even more noticeable. I also got a new blind zit on the size of my nose that's huge and red. Plus, one on my chin (formerly a whitehead) went underground overnight. It's now a blind pimple. Meanwhile, I have to cover all of the pinprick broken blood vessels that are bright red, plus all of the existing hyperpigmented scars. Retin-A burned the section between my eyebrows last night. Everything went wrong. It does not look good. Just a few days ago, my skin was pretty decent. And now my Minocycline is making me dizzy and nauseous. I have a headache. I don't know if it's worth it or not, especially since I'm only taking it for this current flare-up. I don't know how to fix this. My zits take forever to go away (2-3 weeks or more), then they leave red marks for years. I'm truly not exaggerating. I may end up at the dermatologist, they'll tell me there's nothing more they can do, and I will have wasted time and money. I hate that...