111 replies to this topic

[Willow3]

****EDIT: Diane 35 log starts page 3, post 43.****


Seems a bit late to be starting a log, but I keep saying there's no point because soon I will be clear. And here I am 8 months later.

HISTORY:

So I guess i will start with my history. I developed moderate acne when I was 12 on my face back and chest. When I was about 15 or 16 my doctor suggested I use some perscription meds, I had never trued to clear my skin before this because I didn't think there was anything that could be done. She started me on T-stat, did nothing, then oral tetracycline, did nothing. Then when i was 18 she put me on Diane 35. After 6 months I was totally clear.

I stayed that way until I moved to a big city for University. I was so stressed that i kept forgetting to take my Diane, well i started breaking out again, body and face. After that Diane didn't work as well as before. Probably because the city and pollution made my skin worse. Well I started using benzamycin in combination with the Diane at night. Cleared me some, but i was never totally happy.

In the winter of 2005 I started putting 2% SA on my skin during the day, and noticed I was much clearer. So I stopped the benzamycin and used SA day and night, I was totally clear! Well, I had been worry for awhile that the Diane was aggravating another medical condition, so i decided to stop it to see if the SA would clear me on it's own. A month off Diane all my acne came back full force.

I decided to try other treatment options before going back on Diane 35. I decided tretinoin would be a good idea, and my doctor agreed. I started with 0.01% for 5 weeks, then 0.025% for 5 weeks, then 0.05% for 3 months, and now I am on 0.1%.

My skin has followed the standard course. First couple of weeks are good, then irritation and a breakout, with slow steady improvement after week 7.

Wow, this is longer than I had thought!


TODAY:

Okay, so now I am at week 13 of tretinoin 0.1%. I still seem to be purging, but around week 11 I started seeing some better improvement, alot less crap coming to the surface. I'm not getting alot in the way of huge pimples anymore, really just little red marks as small plugs come to the surface. This is why i am certain that this med will clear me up enough. I beleive I am still in a purging stage. And, I am much improved! I have maybe 3 or 4 active pimples on my face, and the rest is just red marks that will fade quickly. My chest has a couple little plugs coming to the suface, but they are all rimmed with red. Not really real pimples though. My back has a good 20 of the little red spots.

[Willow3]

RANT ON HOW ACNE HAS EFFECTED MY LIFE:

My body acne has always effected me alot more than my facial acne. I hope my facial acne has taught me to be less vain, less concerned with what other think about me. I have no regrets over having moderate facial acne, as I say now that my face is almost clear! My body acne has really effected me. I have never felt comfortable dating, it makes me feel so disgusting. I am very embrarassed about it. Other than my doctor I have only been able to tell two of my friends about it in the last 12 years! I regret not being able to wear tank tops, go to the beach or pool, wear pretty dresses, and date boys. I have tried getting over it, but I cannot the same way I have gotten over facial acne. I know it is my fault I have missed out on some aspects of life...so please don't tell me so. I just need somewhere to rant. I really hope the tretinoin will clear up my body acne, I want to start dating agian soon, but I just can't take the initaiative until it is clear.

[kingziggy]

RANT ON HOW ACNE HAS EFFECTED MY LIFE:

My body acne has always effected me alot more than my facial acne. I hope my facial acne has taught me to be less vain, less concerned with what other think about me. I have no regrets over having moderate facial acne, as I say now that my face is almost clear! My body acne has really effected me. I have never felt comfortable dating, it makes me feel so disgusting. I am very embrarassed about it. Other than my doctor I have only been able to tell two of my friends about it in the last 12 years! I regret not being able to wear tank tops, go to the beach or pool, wear pretty dresses, and date boys. I have tried getting over it, but I cannot the same way I have gotten over facial acne. I know it is my fault I have missed out on some aspects of life...so please don't tell me so. I just need somewhere to rant. I really hope the tretinoin will clear up my body acne, I want to start dating agian soon, but I just can't take the initaiative until it is clear.

ACCUTANE WILL CLEAR ALL THAT UP

[Willow3]

ACCUTANE WILL CLEAR ALL THAT UP

I know, but i won't go on accutane. I don't want to take anything that has the potential to damage my joints, I LOVE working out! And, I have other medical conditions that are much more serious than acne, that would probably be worsened by accutane. So overall, not worth the risk. Anyway, I could always go back on Diane and SA... .

[Willow3]

I had a freakout over my skin last night, after I washed my face everything looked so red and inflames and worse. The thing that annoys me about tretinoin is that it makes my skin so easily damaged. Sometimes I get red marks on my face, where I didn't even have a pimple, but it looks like I had/have one! It is annoying whe i have like 10-15 of these marks, makes my skin look so much worse. I covinced myself that I will never be clear on this regeime, and i should go back on the Diane. And I just posted on the board that i wouldn't change anything for another three weeks!

So I was walkimg around in freezing rain for about 30 min yesterday, my face was totally numb when I got home. The coldness took away all the redness and swelling on all the spots I currently have, it was great!

The one thing i will change is... NO TOUCHING MY FACE. I'm actually going to start counting how many times a day I touch my face, and update it on this log. I think I need some accountability, and a way to track my progress. May sound extreme, it it is so hard for me!

I really should have started a log much sooner, it is such a release to vent all my feelings somewhere in writing. I honestly doubt any one is following this, but it doesn't matter, because I need this for myself. I've been patient with the tretinoin for 8 months, and I am starting to become frustrated. Whenever I am frustrated I pick my face and make it worse.

Oh, one more rant. I was in the body shop yesterday buying a facial scrub, so i can get rid of the flakies when i want to wera make up. I mentioned to the sales women that i needed something noncomedogenic, but for sensitive skin because I am on irritating acne meds. She gave me this big long lecture of , when you are done with the perscriptions, come back and our tea tree oil line will clear your skin naturally. BULLSHIT! Tea tree oil will not clear my skin! Yeah, i have no doubt that if you have mild acne it can help. But if I am on tretinoin, clind, and BP, AND still breaking out some (mind you my acne is definitle mild now) how the hell is tea tree oil going to clear my skin! I don't think she realized how nasty my skin is med free.

Anyway, that is all i have to say... can't beleive how long all my posts are!

[Willow3]

Okay, so yesterday I breifly picked at my back in the shower twice, just started to touch some spots before I stopped myself. I also picked at a little spot near my hairline briefly. So not to bad.

My 'PMS breaking out' time of the month is over, so my skin should start to improve again. End of February will be it though, I'll go back on the Diane. Tazorac I don't think will be an option, it will just be more irritating than the tretinoin. And differein will just be less effective. I have haerd that the ccream base for tretinoin can be comedogenic, I wonder if I should try retin-a micro before I give up. I have an appointment with my doctor in a couple of days so I will discuss it with her.

[Willow3]

So yesterday I didn't pick at my face or chest, just a little at my back. Only let the puss out of two huge whitheads, and romoved some blackheads that were already pushing out. That there are still blackheads coming out of my back, not something i used to get, gives me hope that I am still in a purging stage, and my body acne will clear with the tretinoin.

My face is looking fantastic today, a couple of red marks but basically clear!

[LionQueen]

It's HARD to stop picking and touching! Like giving up a nasty little hobby ... but it's definitely the right thing for you to do. Good decision, hang in there ...

I have been in denial for a really long time about the damage I've been doing by picking ... kept convincing myself that I was "extracting" stuff and "taking care of problems". It's only now, when my skin is so close to being really clear at last, that I'm seeing how much worse my picking makes it. So I'm trying to stop, too.

Q

[Willow3]

It's HARD to stop picking and touching! Like giving up a nasty little hobby ... but it's definitely the right thing for you to do. Good decision, hang in there ...

I have been in denial for a really long time about the damage I've been doing by picking ... kept convincing myself that I was "extracting" stuff and "taking care of problems". It's only now, when my skin is so close to being really clear at last, that I'm seeing how much worse my picking makes it. So I'm trying to stop, too.

Q

I'm is the same place, boe that my skin is haeling, I realized the problems i was causing. I was almost making excuses before, 'well the retin-a is going to make me breakout anyway'.

[Willow3]

Tretinoin 1% Week 14:

So I picked at my lower back last night, I'm so annoyed at myself. A little at my upper back. But no picking at my face or chest. My chest and afce are still pretty clear, but alot of really small red things.

Changes I have made...I am wearing clean shirt to bed everynight. Hopefully this will help clear up my back. Also i got a perscription fro retin-a micro 0.1% from my doctor, i will start using this tonight. Hopefully it will be a little more effective, and reduce the irritation.

I'm happy I have greatly reduced my picking, even though I was never very harsh, I think just touching my skin worsens my acne.

I'm seriously considering going back on the Diane 35, but I'll give this another 2 weeks first.

[LionQueen]

Here are a thread and a website that are really helping me with my picking problem:

48 Hour No Picking Challenge

stop self injurious skin picking

Also ... hang in there with the Retin A. Your skin will get used to it ... you just have to remember that "less is more", it's a long-term treatment, and it takes awhile to adjust to it. After 3 months, it had me completely clear.

Q

[Willow3]

Here are a thread and a website that are really helping me with my picking problem:

48 Hour No Picking Challenge

stop self injurious skin picking

Also ... hang in there with the Retin A. Your skin will get used to it ... you just have to remember that "less is more", it's a long-term treatment, and it takes awhile to adjust to it. After 3 months, it had me completely clear.

Q

Thanks for the websites, I'll take a look at them. Sadly I'm already at 3.5 months. I'm really not having trouble with irritation on my face, but my back is so itchy and painful. I'm going to watch how much I'm putting on.

[Willow3]

Okay, I just signed up for the 48 hour no picking challenge! I'm very excited, I like challenges. It is 8:30 am Saturday morning.

So yesterday I picked one spot on my chest, it was a white lump at the suface, so it wasn't too bad of me. Also i removed some blackheads from my forehead and one from my back. All the plugs expelled really easily, so it was bad of me, but not too bad.

[Willow3]

So I have been really stresses, and broke out with 3 bigger pimples and three smaller ones, not bad. I have never noticed before that stress effects my skin before. My back and chest are continuing to improve, but the irritation is so bad right now!

24 hours of the no picking challenge are done. I caught myself running my hand over my back in the shower, and scratching my back once while watching a movie. I also purposeley popped the large pimple on my forehead. All the pus was right at the suface so i decided it would go away faster, although I left all the others alone. Overall I am happy, one instance of picking, and I carefully considered doing it, and still support my decision!. 24 to go!

One more thing i forgot, I think my back and chest are improving since I started wearing a clean shirt to bed every night, so I'm going to keep this up.

I was convinced yesterday that i would go back on the Diane, but no. I'm getting the retin-a micro tonight, and starting it. I think that if I get rid of the irritation, I will be happy with the results I have now.

[Willow3]

I keep running out of time to pick-up my retin-a micro. Tonight I will! My back and chest are really clering nicely. I think I might be tempted to get more pillowcases so i can sleep on a clean pillowcase every night, I think it will make a difference. But I am too busy at the moment. 48 hour picking challenge is over. I scratched an itch and a blackhaed popped out into my fingers, this can't really count as picking, because I was not aware that it was there or, even in front of a mirror. While i was studying I think I breifly scratched at a spot on my neck.

Next 48 hour challenge starts now! This time my goal is for no accidental picking, or touching my skin except for if there is an itch. I have to stop myself before my fingers even brush my skin.

[Willow3]

So I got retin-a micro last night. It smells really gross! Anyway, I am hoping it will be a little more effective, and wil reduce irritation. I was looking at my back last night, a noticed that one of the pimples I accidedntally scratched/ picked the other day has gotten bigger, but everything else is healing up. So I think this whole no picking/ touching thing is working really well. My lower back is clearing really well. When I was washing my back last night, tons of little plugs wiped off my skin, they had just been purged to the surface. So, I think I am definitely still going through a purging stage there. Although I think i only have two or three active pimples. I think because my skin is thicker there, it will take longer to work.

24 hours left of my second 48 hour challenge! I didn't pick at all, and I can't remember even touching my skin unless there was an itch!

[Willow3]

Well, I definitely pick at my skin more when I am upset. I am having a bad day, and what do you know I find myself in front of the bathroom mirror. I didn't pick though, but I wanted to. I have a number of pimples that are so close to the surface, but I know picking will just make them worse, or at the least cause future breakouts. I didn't even touch my skin, I just spot treated with some antibiotic and left the bathroom. I think now that I recognize the triggers that make me touch my skin it is helping alot to stop. It is always when I am upset, or right when I get out of the shower. I don't think that it is that I am trying to punish myself or anything, more that I have less self control when I am upset. This log is helping alot too, it lets me vent my frustrations over my skin, so I feel less inclined to 'do' something to help my skin. Also, when i keep a log on picking, and write down my successes, it helps me realize that by not touching my skin I am actually doing something.

It is really important that i do stop picking my skin, because I need to see what the full effects of the tretinoin will be, so I can make an informed decision on whether to go back on the Diane. I really only want to go back on the Diane if it is absolutely neccessary.

In 10 days I will be at 16 weeks, so that should be maximum effects of tretinoin. With the last two weeks with no picking/ touching. I might go until 17 weeks just to be sure, but then if I am not happy with my skin the only choice will be to go back on the Diane.

The micro seems pretty good, very little irritation today, but it is probably too early to tell for sure if it is less irritating.

I'm supposed to go out this weekend, but I can't think of anything I can where that will cover both my back and chest...so frustrating.

[Willow3]

I gave in and picked last night? But I only removed blackheads that were ready to come out, so I didn't do a noticeable damage. Two from my back, that only required my to rub my finger across them, and some from my nose i ahd to give a little squeeze to. Oh, I almost started picking my lower back, but stopped myself. I failed the challenge, but have improved the degree of picking alot! Anyway, I'm going to go on a day by day basis now.

I'm woorried that because I put retin-a micro on my skin right before i go to bed, that it is all getting rubbed off instead of absorbed. I think i will try putting it on 30 min before I go to sleep so it can be absorbed fisrt. I really think i am getting less irritation now.

[Willow3]

My chin is breaking out alot right now, and my chin some. This may be an initial breakout, because I was using less tretinoin on these areas before because they were very sensitive, but now my skin has adjusted enough that I can put more on. My forhead is pretty clear, that is usually the worst. My back just keeps on improving! My chest has a couple of pimples, if it were to clear up I think I would be happy with my results.

[Willow3]

So my back is definitely clearing up very well with the combo of no touching and clean pajama's. Sometimes I wear shirts more than once before I wash them, but I'm going to start washing them everytime, I think this will help as well. I have to do laundry every week anyway for my gym clothes. I already wear a clean sports bra everyday when I work out, in the summer I wear a clean shirt/ tank top when I run. This time of yaer though I only have two running winter shirts, I should probably get 3 more (I run 5 days per week). They are like 30 buck's each though, and i don't have 100 dollars right now. I wear these shirts when it is below 5 Celcius, down to -15, so it's not like I am sweating alot!

I went out in a tank top last night, it ws fabulous to feel confidednt about my skin on my back and chest. The no picking is working really well, along with clean shirts. I have a couple of pimples on my chest that are really sarting to fade, and I don't see any others coming to repace them, so my chest might be totally clear soon!

I think with the micro you do need to still wait 30 min after washing your skin, I was starting to get some irritation. although it is definitely less irritating than the cream, I can put a normal amount on my chin area without getting dry, flacky skin. Although it is causing another initial breakout in this area.

I'm at 15 weeks, so one more to go before I can expect full results with my skin.

I bought SA, not sure if I am going to start using it though, I'm worried about excess irritation.