12 replies to this topic

[Empty Inside]

anyone else experience this? I've had acne since I was about 12 years old, sixth grade. of course it bothered me but i didnt get too depressed over it. yes i got made fun of for it, yes i didnt have many friends or a girlfriend because of it, but i didnt think it was all that bad. i just was able to accept the fact that i would be alone for the rest of my life and i wasnt too upset with that. i was able to accept this because i didnt know what it was like to live a good life, i didnt know what i was missing out on.

but eventually my acne got so bad i just had to go to a derm (i was about 16 at the time). he put me on some antibiotics and it actually cleared me 100% by the time i was 17. this was the first time in 5 years (almost 1/3 of my life) that i had normal skin. nothing about my personality really changed, i was still pretty shy and antisocial because of all the abuse i got when i had acne. but something else did change. i was able to get friends, i was even able to approach girls without them making fun of me. finally my life was getting better. i made some good friends and we started going to the gym and working out. the best feeling in the world is waking up to clear skin and not have to stare in the mirror feeling depressed about acne. i was litterally happy when i woke up in the mornings for the first time. i was even happy to go to school to talk to girls and friends. acne never even crossed my mind, it was out of my life completely.

but just when i was starting to reach my full potential i started to grow resistant to the antibiotics. my whole life came crashing down. acne came back and in full force. my friends abandoned me and girls wanted nothing to do with me again. i was thrust into a state of depression that i have never been able to get out of. my life didnt go back to the way it was before i cleared my acne, it is much, much worse. why is it worse? because i know now what i am missing out on. i know how great my life was when i had clear skin, and i know how terrible it is now. and i know ill never get it back, ill never be the same. everyday it gets harder and harder to live. i can barely even make it through the day because im just exhausted all the time (even though all i do is sleep). the only thing i can think about is having clear skin again. it consumes everything i do. i have lost scholarships, been made fun of, abused, mugged, and even kicked out of my home all due to acne.

the only thing that keeps me going is that 2 months of my life that i had clear skin. i just have to think one day i will get back to that. but those thoughts are slowly fading each day i wake up to a knew face of acne. all of my motivation is burning out. i dont know how much longer i can take this...

so basically the point of this thread is to say you cant fully understand how terrible acne is until you feel how good life is when you dont have it.

Edited by Empty Inside, 28 January 2012 - 02:08 PM.

[DesiAngel]

No not really.
Over this time period you had acne, then no acne, then acne again.
However over the same time period, many people had acne, then acne, and still had acne.

Be happy that you enjoyed a period of normal skin, and that you know how to attain your normal skin.
Many of us, still have not figured it out.

[Empty Inside]

you clearly did not understand my post at all........i would rather have never gotten rid of my acne for the short time i did, then i wouldnt have known how good life is without acne, its not that hard to understand. and wow i had 2 months of normal skin, big deal. no i have not figured out how to attain normal skin, did you even read the post? i am not resistant to all antibiotics and cant clear my skin again

[tritonxiv]

Empty Inside, on 28 January 2012 - 03:17 PM, said:

you clearly did not understand my post at all........i would rather have never gotten rid of my acne for the short time i did, then i wouldnt have known how good life is without acne, its not that hard to understand. and wow i had 2 months of normal skin, big deal. no i have not figured out how to attain normal skin, did you even read the post? i am not resistant to all antibiotics and cant clear my skin again

Unfortunately for people like us, in order to truly rid ourselves from acne, we have to sacrifice our overall health and quality of life. (Either through long term self-medication of Accutane, or massive dietary changes) Other than that, THERE IS NO 100% EFFECTIVE CURE FOR ACNE.

There are new studies and experiments being undertaken by ACNE.ORG members on a daily basis. You can try one of those cutting edge methods, or you can choose what is proven to work, and all the consequences that come with it.

Life sucks sometimes. But luckily, we are given the power to change our MINDS as well as our bodies.

Good luck in your choice.

Edited by tritonxiv, 28 January 2012 - 03:44 PM.

[Omnivium]

Empty Inside, on 28 January 2012 - 03:17 PM, said:

you clearly did not understand my post at all........i would rather have never gotten rid of my acne for the short time i did, then i wouldnt have known how good life is without acne, its not that hard to understand. and wow i had 2 months of normal skin, big deal. no i have not figured out how to attain normal skin, did you even read the post? i am not resistant to all antibiotics and cant clear my skin again

Antibiotics are not the only way. Have you tried diet? This diet seems pretty good to me: http://www.acne.org/...__fromsearch__1 That guy has it all figured out. If you control your blood sugar and internal inflammation, you should clear up a lot.

And I'm just curious, does your username refer to the All That Remains song?

[Kyle_]

Back last year, before I found the org, I discovered a website, which some people here might recognise, which told me to starve myself with apples every day for 3 days, at that point, I went crazy over acne diet, I became so skinny because I stopped eating things that made me happy, I refused to enjoy a rtakeaway with my friends, it was horrible, but it amazingly cleared my skin, I also started taking something I think was called biiodermanzen, some sort of wired herbal acne cure, (SOrry if im not suppose to post brands,) at one point, my antibiotics, herbal crap, and diet came to an end, I decided, surley something I enjoy eating wont do any harm, but a week before a big event for me, I broke out, horribly, I had such perfect skin, without the use of BP, I could even use OTV cleansers full of crap but no, I broke out, and fell back to how I was, it was horrible the feeling of being clear, and not even having to worry about a regime.

Now, I'm clear again, but only with the everyday use of the regime

[sasch12]

Empty inside, i am sorry that you are going through this difficult time. You will find lots of support here. I too was clear for periods of time on accutane and it absolutely blows to revert back to acne, especially since i am an adult. You can't give up though. Stay positive, keep in touch with other people and just remind yourself that finding something that works for your skin is a long process and acne is only temporary - you'll eventually find something that works for you.

Good Luck!

[LaChesis]

One word: Accutane. I never really understand people who almost seem on the verge of commiting suicide because they are so depressed about their acne, but have not taken or won't take accutane. Took it once, cleared me for 3 years. Acne has been coming back in the last 6 months, so I'm going on it again in 10 days. It's that simple.. Yes there are side effects and risks involved, but when it gets to the point where you can't enjoy life anymore because of your acne, accutane is definitely the way to go. And for the record, pretty much 99% of people who take accutane only get dry lips/skin as side effects. BIG DEAL.

Edit: so OP, my point is: Do yourself a favor and get on accutane, it'll change your life. Please don't make the mistake of waiting too long and wasting the best years of your life not living because of acne.

Edited by LaChesis, 30 January 2012 - 07:45 PM.

[fplix]

That happens to me all the fucking time. It's unpredictable. It's annoying. It's frustrating as fuck.

[A damsel in Distress]

Hey, I know how you feel. People always tell me things like "hey this is temporary! it wont last forever! I don't understand why you get so worked up about it" .....but theyv never had acne. So how could they possibly know how we feel? Bottom line is, someday you may finally have clear skin (fingers crossed) and then again, you may be in earing aids before it all goes away. We can't curl up in a ball and die while we wait. The more our minds dwell on it, the worse it gets (im preaching to the chior at this point...). Hold your head high, fake some confidence even if you dont have any. Wear Acne. Don't let Acne wear you.
Delightfully, Me:)

[Callum.]

DesiAngel, on 28 January 2012 - 02:51 PM, said:

No not really.
Over this time period you had acne, then no acne, then acne again.
However over the same time period, many people had acne, then acne, and still had acne.

Be happy that you enjoyed a period of normal skin, and that you know how to attain your normal skin.
Many of us, still have not figured it out.

It doesn't matter if you enjoyed a period of normal skin... they now have acne again, and so remain in as much need of help as the rest of the people here...

[EffThis]

I definitely haven't had it as bad as you in terms of severity, but as one of those guys who once 'had a life' with all of the popularity, parties, girls etc. for most of my schooling career (despite having acne & wearing make up every single harrowing day), I have to say you're not missing out on that much. Not compared to having a future at least. Though I don't really genuinely know what it's like to have completely clear skin for even 2 months since my experience has been tumultuous at best & only getting worse for the most part, for me, faking clear skin led to a pretty awesome social life since it gave me all of the self-confidence I needed - & I really did enjoy being 'known' as the party animal/bad boy as such.

But in the end, I honestly have to say I would've swapped it all to be able to live my life away from the spotlight that being the center of attention all of the time brought - because then I wouldn't have cared what other people thought about me anywhere near as much as I did - it would've given me a chance to think things through properly & take some time to figure everything out for myself; & I wouldn't be stuck decaying in a bottomless pit of my own apathy & regret as I currently am.

My downfall was the fact I was already notoriously popular when I first got acne, & so the fear of losing it all due to the degrading condition of my skin is what put so much pressure on me to look 'normal' - which eventually caused me to become more of a recluse than ever since I was really just hiding myself behind the make up. Sure, this was purely the doing of my own self-indlugent vanity, but at the same time I think I would've had far more time to concentrate & focus on my skin if I wasn't so worried about 'living the life' & partying it up, maintaining my appearance etc. just for the sake of doing so & just because I didn't know any other way to live.

Ironically, as a sensitive romantic metal-head at heart (if that's even possible), all I really wished for everyday was to be left alone to deal with my insecurities without the scrutiny of all of my peers, but when you have friends/enemies/girls & all that other crap to deal with it's not so easy to just slip away & vanish without a trace because there are always expectations you have to fulfill. Especially when you're a cocky pretentious pseudo-playboy with everyone asking you what's happening on Friday night. The relentless social pressure & the shallow narcissist within always got the better of me. I can't help but think that if I'd been a more humble down-to-earth kind of guy withdrawn from the typical social scene then it would've made me more resilient to such superficialities in the long term that seem so very redundant in retrospect. Because I wouIdn't have pulled my ultimate Houdini disappearing act & plunged myself into complete isolation for the last year fucking up my future forever. The damage I've done is now permanent & the time I've lost is irrevocably unrecoverable.

So I'm basically trying to say that the life you long for isn't necessarily as fulfilling as you hope it is, because clear skin is only one piece of the puzzle. Maintaining a true circle of friends/girlfriends over a period of time has plenty more challenges & frustrations in itself regardless of what your skin looks like - it doesn't sound as though you had that if they abandoned you purely due to your acne flaring up again. Then your own personal aspirations & achievements are something else entirely. If you're still living some some sort of productive life where you can enjoy even just the little things & have promise of opportunities in the future, then just forget the rest of the shit because one day when you do get clear you'll know exactly how you want to live & you won't regret a day or moment you wasted, since you didn't. Just because you're not the social butterfly you wish you were at the moment doesn't mean you won't be one day. & now you've had a taste of 'the good life', well you know what you're looking forward to at least. Don't think of it as missing out, just think of it as more motivation to get to where you want to be.

& although I've never been brave enough to do it, if you know how good life can be & know how to live without acne altering your personality, well then fuck it dude, enjoy what you've still got if you're content with it or simply put yourself out there if you want something more. I personally have allowed acne & my own vanity to destroy me from the inside out & I will regret it forever. It started as a small niggling worry in the back of my head, but over the years just became too much for me to handle & eventually it engulfed my entire life. & now I've lost it all. Don't waste what you can still have, cause time is the one thing you will never get back. Trust me on that.

PS: Fall Of Ideals = best album ever \m/

Edited by EffThis, 01 February 2012 - 06:03 AM.

[Peony7]

Hey,

I think I know what you are getting at. I started getting acne at 9, but I have also had periods where my skin was very clear. The same exact people will treat you completely differently accordingly to how your skin looks. For me it was always a case of polar opposites - when my skin was clear people would flirt with me, approach me and I was asked to model. When I have acne at its worst I have had people shouting things and spitting at me in the street, telling me to buy clearasil, telling me to my face I was ugly, dirty etc. And the comments aren't just from strangers - some of this was from my family and my husbands family and my friends. I think the major difference with me and some of the people on this site is that I kept on going out anyway, I didn't hide away and as a result I was exposed to even more of this. One girl even threw a punch at me when I told her that I did wash my face.

I think experiencing acne and clear skin does show you how things would be if you didn't have acne. However I am extremely grateful for the times I had clear skin. It improved my confidence a lot so that when the acne came back I was a stronger person.

I think you should look into diet changes if you haven't already. I think this is probably the key for many people. Or you could try diet changes and topicals at the same time.

Also, I just wanted to say be careful of girls - whether you have clear skin or acne. Almost everyone who made comments, bullied and attacked me were female.

Anyway, this is the year I destroy my acne. I think you can too. And when you have destroyed your acne you will be a cool guy with good taste in music and clear skin