10 replies to this topic

[Cassie88]

I really don't know why i did it, i just feel so empty i don't want to do anything.
The last few weeks have been a bit of a nightmare, I've been dumped, have fallen behind with studies and been drinking quite a bit to drown the sorrows and so i got really obsessed with my skin again; consequently my skin erupted in cysts dotted all over my cheeks and chin.Previously, my skin was practically clear after not picking for months so it was especially worse returning to my previous skin state that is, covered in cysts. Finally the stress got to me and when i looked in the mirror i just started squeezing and picking at anything that looked like a bump and i swear i got into a sort of frenzy that i couldn't control. Today i have about 14 large scabs on my face and so its impossible to leave the house. there are also further cysts already starting to form after yesterday so my face is red, swollen and crusty. Its disgusting and i'm just so ashamed, i just got so obsessed with my skin again and its ruining my life.
I'm not due for work for 2 weeks so got that time to try and mend my face and the best way is to leave it the hell alone. Urgh just needed to rant, no-one i can talk to face to face because it actually looks like mine has been hit with shrapnel. Thanks for reading guys.

[pokemonster]

heey plz wear gloves whenever u can! no srsly, this method maybe is annoying n said hundred times but rly it helps to prevent automatical n unaware stress caused picking fo sho so wear them (or at least 1 of them on free hand that u dont use as much) as often as possible, ofc remember that theres nothing as damaging than picking too and that u have to let your skin heal! also rly sorry u have hard times but good luck :<

[girl11]

I'm sorry...I know that feeling of regret all too well. I went through it myself last week where I picked a pimple really bad. I hate when that happens because that means a couple days that I need to hide and keep ointment on my face and I freak out wondering if I've given myself a nasty scar. It WILL heal though if you just let it heal and do not touch the scabs. Usually the first 3-4 days are when it will look it's worst so I'm sure they'll look a lot better in 2 weeks.

[northlincs4kylie]

Thought I'd reply on here because this is exactly what I did the other day, I went mental picking every little pore on my face & then spent the rest of the day being a recluse and crying. Have you managed not to pick since then? I hope so, those few minutes of frenzy really aren't worth the next week or so of avoiding social events and trying not to talk to people.

Keep strong, you can do it

[charliepatton]

thats one of the hard things not to do because it becomes a habit, but i think your just really streesed from losin ur love one and school so u stared picking. try not to strees it only makes your skin worse.... i know your going thru something but youll get thru. be strong

[Cassie88]

Thanks guys for all your replies it really means a lot that there are people out there who understand and so i am very grateful...

I have relapsed a few times the last couple of months and last week was one of the worst picking phases i've had for a long time, i almost spent the whole day in front of a mirror and had to phone in sick to work the next few days. i've been so stressed with work because there is huge pressure on me to meet these deadlines and i've also realised another reason; I talk to practically no-one these days; i live alone and don;t go out. at work i don't really talk to anyone (i do programming) and consequently i've become a recluse. i have now found it even more difficult to talk to people and because of my skin, its x100000 worse. I'm just so miserable and depressed...*cue violin*

I've also just picked two pimples and they're going to be scabs tomorrow morning in time for facing work along with the other 10 i have on my face and the countless red marks.

so goddamn sick of this. I feel i'm reaching the end of my sanity not talking to anyone doesn't help, but no-one understands why i pick except for you guys and so it is reassuring to get these replies...

urgh so sorry for this rant.... anyway this is IT. i mean it, i can't go on living like this its been 6 years of self destruction but i am going to stop. A 30 day challenge starting now....

[girl11]

Ugh, I was also a wreck earlier this week because I squeezed at a pimple except it was a red inflamed one, and then the skin all around my cheek was red too after squeezing it. It looked like I burnt myself or something. I can't exactly give advice because I do the same thing.

Why don't you try taking picture of how it looks after you pick? I took pics the other day, and I'm saving it to look at when I'm tempted. Yes, it sucks when I have a big pimple, but a big pimple is better than a healing scab. It's better to have someone think 'oh she has a pimple' rather than 'what the hell happened to her face??" I know it's hard though, I hate when there's bumps. I still have a red mark now, but I'm not as anxious if it's a flat healing red mark as opposed to a big inflamed pimple. But it's just not good for our skin, and those days where you have to stay inside and hide from the world while it's healing is hell.

Have you tried reading this?
http://www.stoppickingonme.com/

[Cassie88]

Hey girl11 i hope your cheek is healing now and you're absolutely right a pimple looks better than a big crusty scab, its just whenever i'm around a mirror and start scanning my skin you see a spot then you just get so tempted so have thrown away my little compact mirror lol
Yeah i read that a long time ago and have just read it today it is a good reminder thanks so much! And thats a good idea about taking pics i've just taken one and think i might do a photo log once i'm brave enough to look at the pics!

hang in there we can beat this!

[girl11]

Just wondering, have you gotten better? My cheek healed which was good, but I squeezed a pimple on my chin that had a huge head to it but now it's a nasty open sore Even knowing I had those old pictures to look at, I did it. How the heck do we beat this?

[Cassie88]

Hey sorry for late reply had no interent for ages...

How are you doing now? I've managed to sort of control the frenzy i just have to avoid mirrors but what i notice is i pick more when at home so i've been working into the evenings and so when i get back i'm too tired to do anything. Its not great lifestyle but it is helping me to think of other things asides from my skin.
I've also found watching comedy has helped with feeling down and i know my picking has to do with this.

I hope things are better for you!

[Nilan]

I'm glad your feeling better Cassie! There's a 30 day challenge thread which really helps to keep me away from picking and the whole keeping busy in the evenings is good too. Hope you feel better soon aswell girl11!