God and Acne

Does anyone else find it difficult to love and trust God when you have acne? I was raised a Christian all my life. I am 33 years old now and STILL have acne. My skin is STILL incredibly oily, so oily that within an hour of applying my makeup my face looks greasy. Anyway, I have just found it very hard to think that God is very loving and watches over me when my face is a mess all the time. Then I feel guilty for feeling that way. My son just turned 12 and is going through puberty so now he has a little acne as well. I find it so embarassing that we both have acne, although his is "normal" and mine is not. I am so sick of trying to find a product that will work to clear my skin. I am married and my husband has beautiful skin. He does not care that I have acne, but it really destroys my self esteem. I do not feel like being intimate or showing my body to him when I have really big inflammed acne, which is at least a few times a month. I also tend to get acne on my shoulders and back at times and now have tons of scars from it as well. I don't like him to see me without makeup or clothing. I hate feeling ashamed of my skin and body. It makes me just want to give up! I know I have a lot to be thankful for.... a husband who loves me, 2 beautiful sons, but I can't seem to get past my skin. I try to not think about it and I must admit at times I drink too much so I can forget for a bit. I hate that I am this way. I know I should be able to get over it, but I cannot.

Advice about Saw Palmetto use

Hi,
I've posted here a couple times before. I read up on Saw Palmetto, and decided to give it a try as I'm sure my acne is hormonal. I have incredibly oily skin, and every month right before my period, I break out in usually one to two cysts along my jawline. So, after my last period, I started taking one Saw Palmetto 160mg softgel in the morning, and one after dinner. These are the standardized ones. Anyways, I'm due for my next period in a couple days, and this time I've gotten 5 huge cysts along my jawline. What I want is some advice about either stopping or continuing for another month or two. I did notice my skin is a little less oily, but these cysts are the worst I've ever had. What should I do? By the way I am 30 years old. Thanks.

Tea Tree Oil or 10% Benzoyl Peroxide

Which do you think would penetrate into the skin better for cysts? Tea tree oil or 10% benzoyl peroxide? This is my first time posting. I guess I should introduce myself and give my acne background. I have had acne and extremely oily skin since the age of 12. ( I am now 30.) I have never gone to the dermatologist, but have tried many over the counter products. I tend to get blackheads on my nose and the crease in my chin, and large cysts on my jawline and bottom of chin. I also have some acne on the top part of my back, mainly the shoulders and under the neck area. I am currently using the oxy maximum strength acne wash for my back and it has mostly cleared up and stays under control if I use it daily. I have come to the conclusion that the cysts come when I eat cheese or lot's of dairy. I try to avoid dairy when possible, but can't always and so now I have two large cysts on my chin. These are the kind that never seem to come to a head. They just get big, swollen and painful and take 2 weeks or more to go away. Anyways, I am currently using the 5% benzoyl peroxide lotion from Paula's Choice. She does not make anything stronger, but would like to try tea tree or 10% benzoyl peroxide for spot treatment on the cysts themselves. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.