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Just Needed To Vent

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So, I'm annoyed. I messed with a zit and now I have a fairly big red mark on the right side of my chin. And what makes me feel worse than the acne is the fun I miss out on because I'm not willing to slap on a ton of coverup to go outside and sit in the sun. I'm telling myself that it's actually better to put on moisturizer and let my skin breathe instead of sitting in the sun, but still. ugh. I hate acne. A month ago this one red mark and a few tiny healing spots wouldn't have phased me a ton. But now, it's like when I have a bad zit or red mark, I'm even more scared to look in the mirror. I don't want to see it. I don't want to cover it up. I just want it to go away.
I'm getting my blood work drawn on Monday for Accutane and then I have an appointment with my dermatologist next Thursday. I know the Initial Breakout for Accutane might suck...but I'm hoping somehow I can get through it. I want a long-term solution. 
Someone tell me it gets better? 

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