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About this blog

Daily update on my acne journey with Accutane and finally finding "me" again...

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So I am not entirely sure how I feel about the "Regimen."  I felt like the pimples were calming down then BOOM another breakout.  Plus, I am getting worse dry skin then I did with Accutane years ago.  BUT I am not a quitter and will stick with it for now, at least until my 30 day wAiT is up...OKAY so I just spilled the beans...

If you are following me on my blog you know that I had a derm appointment on Monday.  I have been going back and forth about going on a second round of tane knowing that my husband and I so desperately have been trying to conceive AND tane requires birth control.  I have been contemplating whether having acne-free skin again was worth the wait of trying to get pregnant.  My derm thinks that another round of tane is best for 5-6 months.  I was a prime candidate before with NO side effects that were not easily managed- PLUS, it kept me clear almost eight years!  SOOO...after a long talk with my hubby and derm, I will be going back on tane.  I figure a happier, more confident, "me" is a lot more healthier to conceive than a stressed, depressed, and anti-social one.  So I will be taking the next 5-6 months finding "me" again and getting myself back to a healthy state of mind/body.  I am excited to be acne-free again and move on with my life. 
My 30 day wait is up on August 7.  I will update after that time with my very own Accutane story...progress is coming- I can FEEL it!!

The Regimen

By fraje14134,

So while waiting for my derm appointment scheduled for Monday 7/7 I decided to order the Regimen and see if it could give me more immediate relief.  I started it Thursday and I can't believe the difference thus far.  It has begun clearing up all active pimples that I have and drying out the red spots left behind.  I am wondering if I should stick to this for awhile rather than jumping into another round of Accutane.  As I mentioned in my last blog post, I am ready to move on with my life and start a family :) Accutane would require me to wait at least a year in order to begin trying to conceive.  If the "Regimen" continues to clear my skin, I may just stick to this and an oral antibiotic.  I am feeling hopeful that the Lord has a plan for me and my life.  He knows the direction I am to go and I will follow my heart.  I will update you all on what I hear from my derm on Monday.  Thanks and enjoy your 4th of July weekend :)  I will post progress pics on my next post if the Regimen continues to work for me!
          Before delving into the depths of my struggles with acne- I wanted to take the time to give some background information on all other aspects that make-up who I am (I guess you could call them the "positive" qualities that acne and low self-esteem can't take away.) 

Here GOES....

          My name is Amber and I am 25 years old.  I married my high school sweetheart and just recently nailed a "hard-to-come-by" permanent teaching job in northwestern PA!  My husband and I are finally at a place where starting a family should be and would be the next step...It seems that there are many positive things occurring all around me and that my life seemed to finally be falling in place...well...all except for one little issue- my acne which has returned suddenly after 8 years of being practically "acne-free." 

          Acne is a very fragile topic for me.  It is unbelievable how it can completely change the person you are into someone you do not want to be both physically and mentally.  I have become a stranger in my own body...I am on a journey which I hope you will embark on with me- to finding myself again...It will not be easy and the struggle will take time.  We all have to start somewhere right?!

          I took Accutane (Sotret) when I was 17 for five months (I wish I could remember the dosage...sorry.)  It completely cleared my skin in that time.  I had absolutely NO real side effects that were not easy to manage or control.  Needless to say, I was acne free for the most part for 8 years.  Recently, my life has been a roller coaster ride...I lost my father to cancer in May of this year.  He was diagnosed in November with Pancreatic Cancer and died six months later.  The monthly struggles, watching him suffer, watching him wither away took a huge toll on me...This rocked me to the core and opened the door to a darkness I've not ever experienced before- a new low...and also opened up the door for a unwanted friend to return- acne... 

          I started combatting my acne with over the counters (acne free 10%, clean and clear Persa Gel 10%, Kate Somerville products, Murad products, and proactiv.)  None of these products brought about true relief- if anything, they caused more irritation.  I even broke down and purchased a Clarisonic thinking I just was not "cleaning" my face properly. Still- NO RELIEF.  Now I have full blown acne again at age 25- this age is supposed to be my prime right?!  I then decided to try and contact my derm whom prescribed me Accutane 8 years ago.  Of course she is booked and scheduling two months out!!!  I made an appointment for July 7th and I am anxiously awaiting to begin the second round of Accutane- which for me, IS THE MIRACLE ACNE CURE!  In the meantime of waiting for July 7th to arrive, I made an appointment with my family doctor to try and get some immediate relief.  He prescribed me Metrogel first, which by-the-way is a TOTAL waste of money, super expensive even with insurance, and made everything worse.  I went back to him a week later and begged for something new- he then put me on Minocycline 100mg twice a day and Erythromycin gel.  While they have calmed my acne down some, I am still experiencing new breakouts every day.    :-/

          So this takes you to where I am today- one week away from starting my second Accutane journey.  I am a full believer that the second time around (especially when your acne is on the mild-moderate side and now in my mid-twenties) will cure me of this for the rest of my life.  Like I said before, my first round was for a short period of time, I believe a low-dose, and kept me in remission for 8 years.  I am going to push for a moderate-higher dose this go around.  I look forward to update you each week and maybe each day if it helps me cope.  Even if nobody in the world ever reads this- my shoulders feel lighter with sharing my thoughts, my struggles, and my journey to finding "Amber" again...Thanks for reading...

The above pic is to remind myself of what I look like completely happy- I will get there again...         
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