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Baby steps

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Okay Okay

Okay, maybe I was overreacting yesterday. This is what acne does to me- it stresses me out! But I'm a lot happier today. My face cleared up real nice, but it was super dry this morning so I loaded on a crap load of lotion. But it's not real dry now. I decided to wear makeup today, because I felt so naked without it yesterday. But I'm kind of sort of happy with how I look right now. ❤

It really ticks me off when people make fun of me for wanting to die because of my acne. It's so easy for the clear- skinned - maybe - a - pimple- or -two people to say. They don't know the struggle. They don't know how much makeup I have to pile on just to look decent. They don't know how I had literally take down my mirror in my room because every time I looked in it I wanted to die because of the way I looked. That's how I feel right now. I put on skin makeup for the first time during the day today (read my previous entry to find out why). And I can't cover up this massive pimple on my chin. They always gather up on my chin. My chin is bone dry, all peeling and gross. I put on a ton of lotion and let it soak in. It's still peeling and nasty, but now with makeup on which kind of makes it look worse. And this zit is huge, really noticable.... ugh. Nobody knows how irritating this is unless they have it. So if you don't have acne, and you don't understand the struggle, then you keep your mouth shut when I say I want to die because of it. Because I do. Without any self confidence, is life worth living? I don't think so. I have other problems besides the acne, yes, but my lack of self confidence is what really brings me down. I don't know what to do anymore, and I've given up. But of course I'll keep you updated, if you'd like❤

Baby Steps

I am just moments away from getting in the car to go to school. But, I wanted to share something first... Today is the first day I am going to school with no skin makeup! The only makeup I used was eye makeup, and a little concealer to cover my dark under eye circles. But that was it! I'm looking in the mirror now and I can't really tell that I'm wearing no skin makeup. It feels good to not have all that heavy makeup on too! I also tried the regimen today. I didn't have any neutrogena stuff for benzoyl peroxide, so I used the last step of proactive, which on the back said it had 2.5% benzoyl peroxide. Hope it works! I'm wondering if I'll see results tomorrow? We'll see! I have to go, but I will keep you updated ❤

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