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Not Getting My Hopes Up

Posted by leopard1, 23 February 2012 · 152 views

Hello all,

okay so i'm still on 100mg spiro 1x/day, but i have been taking an extra 50mg a couple of days a week because my face is still super oily but my spots seem to be clearing up (cross my fingers and hence the title not getting my hopes up). i feel like every time i make progress something always sets me back, BUT i should not think like that. i'm not using any topicals for the past 2 weeks other than acne.org face wash and moisturizer. over the past couple days I have been using acne.org BP as a spot treatment on a few spots I have and my forehead.

as far as spots go, i have a couple healing on my R cheek and 3 new ones on my L cheek and chin, i still have several whiteheads as well. BUT my skin is nowhere near as rough as it was a few days ago, the under the skin bumps and roughness seems to be fading, hope it lasts. and my overall tone of my skin is evening out, of course i still have redness and some dark spots but it's less angry. i still wake up with new pimples ever day, i mean some of them are big, some ehh not a big deal. my face is still oily even though i've been trying to be really simple w/ my regimen. i stopped using my dermablend cover stick to cover up zits about a 1 week ago because i found out it had mineral oil it it!!! wow i thought i would have looked into that more, crazy. my skin feels slightly less oily since then, probably more mental though. i still blot 2-3x/day and re apply powder. so as far as makeup goes i use bare minerals concealer powder and loose powder foundation from them as well in matte, it's not great coverage, you can still see the uneven texture and tone but it feels better on my face, light weight. i've been using it for over a year now. i only use makeup when i'm going out of the house. when i'm at home i'm bare face

i have to confess though, i had these annoying flesh colored bumps on my forehead, like 7-8, and i've had them for weeks now and they wouldn't go away, not terribly noticeable straight on but definitely in lighting. soooooo i popped most of them last night, woops. but honestly they are barely any raised bumps now and you can't even tell i did anything to them because they were all blackheads/whiteheads, they were super easy to pop and this hard sticky brown/white goop came straight out, not puss at all (sorry i know its gross). but now my forehead feels really smooth. i mean they have been there for weeks and they were obviously not going anywhere until i helped them and not its better, my forehead has never been a problem before the last couple of weeks so it was annoying because my chin and cheeks were red and pimples and now my forehead was too. i don't recommend popping and i don't usually anywhere else on my face but these were so stubborn and i would totally do it again.

i'm still planning on starting accutane next month, appt march 9th. even if my skin gets better over the next couple weeks i'm so scared i'll relapse and go backwards like i've done lately and then i'm screwed because i wait another 2 months. i'm just gonna go for it no matter what, even though i contemplate daily.

as far as emotions go, my skin feels good today so i feel good. it's so crazy how my skin controls my mood. my husband is the most amazing person and constantly comments on how beautiful i am. i am soooo lucky to have him and i need to do something super special for him because he has been my rock and if i didn't have him i don't know what i would have done over this last year. oh and btw i hate proactiv commercials. it's on as i'm writing this, totally off topic (kinda), but they're pics are absolutely ridiculous and there is no way that they're products are doing what the ppl say, they obviously have a ton of makeup on and you can tell, there is no way someone looks that good. i'm glad if proactiv works for some but they are on the TV seriously ever 5minutes. ok sorry for the rant.

so all in all, good progress as of now. hope it continues and gets better and better. thanks for listening.




You will probably contemplate it up until you take the first accutane pill. I did! My face got super clear about a week before I started and I almost turned back but I didn't and I am glad I didn't because my face exploded a day or 2 before starting (which made it a little easier). Once I took that first pill I felt so empowered!

My fiance has to go through the same things it sounds like your hubby goes through. I have been a hermet for the past few years because I am embarassed about my face. I feel like all of his friends wives have perfect skin and I hate comparing myself but I can't help it sometimes! We are getting married in October and I have this dream that on our honeymoon on the beach I wake up with clear skin and I can just jump in my bathing suit and hit the beach without obsessing about my face! That is one thing that is keeping me motivated. I suggest finding something like planning a little vaca or something when it is over to help you keep going!

Good luck!

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